Too Young
by victory.x
Summary: We are the reckless, we are the wild youth. And we don't want to grow up. Not yet.
1. Before

**WARNING: Swearing, alcohol, and racebent characters. If you don't like racebent characters, just pretend they're not racebent. I mean, I like racebent characters. I think they're cool. If you don't, whatever. You do you, man.**

 **TOO YOUNG: In which a group of infallibly stupid, annoyingly endearing teenagers do crazy shit. And probably get smashed a lot.**

* * *

Includes!

James Potter, an Indian, cocky boy who wears glasses and enjoys riding a broomstick far too much.

Sirius Black, a Venetian spoiled brat who's an asshole to everyone he meets and rides a motorcycle because he thinks he's punk rock.

Remus Lupin, the highly educated yet angsty boy that survives on chocolate and books.

Peter Pettigrew, the boy we all grew up hating but will grudgingly learn to like throughout this story.

Severus Snape, the boy without any friends, a fiery disliking for James Potter, and the saddest love story of all time.

Lily Evans, the redheaded girl who we all honestly want to be.

* * *

 _We are the reckless, we are the wild youth._

- _Daughter, "Youth"_

* * *

 **Please review, favorite and follow. Also, I like your face.**


	2. Welcome Home

_Chapter 1._

Venice, city of canals. Of gondoliers and winged lions and gold-plated angels hovering over you from the spires of the church.

Two dark figures sat on a wooden bench. One was smaller, thinner, and stiffer, while the other was taller and had his arm hanging lazily over the side.

The taller one was smoking a cigarette, which wasn't uncommon in Venice. He blew a plume of grey smoke onto the other boy's face, making him cough and splutter.

Anyone could guess from a glimpse that the two were brothers, though if you looked again, you'd be less sure.

Both had thick dark hair and the traditional Venetian olive skin, skin shimmering gold in the hazy sunlight. Both were uncommonly beautiful boys, though the smaller one was thinner with hollowed cheeks, tired eyes. Although younger, he looked older than his brother. He wore a crisp black suit and pants, and was fixedly staring into the canal water.

The older boy clapped a hand onto his brother's back. His eyes were bright, he had high cheekbones, and he wore his hair long, tied back in a bun. He was wearing a maroon shirt with a black leather jacket thrown on top, black pants and boots. He smirked at a girl who'd been staring at him, and she nearly fell into the canal.

"Sirius," said the younger boy quietly. "When do you think Mum will come back?"

"Hmmm?" hummed Sirius, who had comfortably tucked his arms behind his head and was leaning against his younger brother's shoulder.

"Mum." the boy repeated, more insistently. He didn't push his brother off of him.

Sirius sighed loudly and sat up, frowning at his brother. "Who cares?" He stood up and stretched. "Do you dare me to jump?" He eyed the canal.

The boy glared at his older brother. "Only to kill yourself," he replied snidely. "And _I_ care. You know Mum hates it when you smoke those Muggle things."

"Oh, this?" Sirius teased, tossing the cigarette at the boy, who fumbled with it in his hands. "Yeah, I know." He kicked a rock into the water. "Feel that breeze, Regulus? That's the ocean." He outstretched his arm and took a deep breath. "I'm going to see it someday."

Regulus rolled his eyes. "I'm going to the bookstore down the street," he said. "When you're done daydreaming, you can join me."

"I'd rather die!" Sirius said dramatically, but there was no one there to hear him say it.

"Hmmm," he said again, kicking another rock in the water. It hit the surface with a tiny _plink!_

He dipped his toe in the water. Nothing happened.

He sighed, then went back and sat on the bench.

Muggle Venice was boring. You couldn't do magic, you couldn't smoke cigarettes, you couldn't do this or that or this— but you _could_ babysit your little brother.

Muttering under his breath, Sirius trailed after his brother's past self and found himself in the bookstore. He spotted Regulus immediately, comfortably squashed into an armchair with a pile of books surrounding him. Sirius snorted. He was beginning to think he was adopted.

Nudging past the nonfiction shelves, he grabbed a random book, flipped it open, and leaned against the wall. His eyes slid over the words like dew on a leaf. He slammed the book shut. He couldn't read Italian.

The worst part about spending summer in his home country was that he couldn't see James.

James, the smug, glasses-wearing idiot. Probably snuggling up with a redhead in the Three Broomsticks. James had a weird thing for redheads. Sirius didn't care. He just liked girls in general.

A tall, raven-haired woman walked through the doorway, looking oddly and unfortunately like a thundercloud. Sirius' thoughts immediately soured. Well, he liked all girls _but_ his mum.

Regulus, on the other hand, _adored_ his Mum, practically worshipped the ground she walked on. He was all ready to get _Mommy's Boy_ tattooed across his chest. Sirius nodded to himself. Very masculine.

Regulus had bought his pile of books. When Sirius swaggered over to them, whistling with his hands in his pockets, his mother glared down at him in distaste. "No books?"

"None," Sirius responded sagely. Snap of the wrist, and he had one of Regulus's books in his hand. He flipped it open and began to read, " _Potions and Polar Bears—_ "  
"Thank you," Regulus grabbed the book and closed it. "If you wanted a book, you should've got one."

"It doesn't matter if he wants one or not." snapped their mother. "You're going to study all night. You _know_ about the week before school. And," her eyes snapped back to Sirius's. "you're going to keep your grades up this year."

He ignored her. "You want to play Quidditch back at the Manor, Regulus?"

"No, he doesn't, Sirius."

Regulus swallowed and looked at his books.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "God, don't any of you have any fun?"

"I have fun!" Regulus defended himself as they followed their mother out the door. Sirius took one of the books and hit Regulus with it.

* * *

It was raining.

"It's the night before school," Regulus said, looking up from his books for the first time that day.

Sirius tossed a snitch back and forth in his palm. It reminded him of James.

"Yeah?"

"Are you excited?"

"Obviously," he droned, a perfect imitation of Snivellus. "I can get out of this hell."

"Venice isn't hell."

"Not Venice," Sirius elaborated. "This fucking _house_."

"What's wrong with this house?" Regulus sounded slightly affronted.

Sirius shot his brother a sideways grin that always won over the girls. Not his brother. "The people."

"Oh, fuck you." Regulus said, turning away from him and picking up a newspaper. "Hey, have you seen this?"

"Unlike you, I have better things to do than read through mountains of political gossip," Sirius responded calmly.

Regulus snorted. "Like tossing a snitch back and forth?"

Sirius grabbed the newspaper. His eyes caught on a headline: _Forty Muggles Killed In Freak Rebel Accident_. "Hell," he breathed, scanning over the words again and again. A knot tightened over his chest.

"There's rumors about a rebel group that's taking Europe over by storm," Regulus said, adopting the tone he used whenever he answered a question in class. "It's not like before, the other Pureblood Supremacist groups. This is real, and people are getting affected. They're actually _doing_ stuff."

"Why doesn't anyone stop them?" Sirius asked, shaking his head.

Regulus was quiet for a long time. "They don't know how. Anyway, Mum likes them." he said finally.

Another silence.

" _Mum_ ," Sirius spat out the word. "is crazy. Absolutely, utterly mad. Don't listen to a thing she says."

"Mum says not to listen to _you_ ," Regulus replied, frowning.

"Because I'm the only sane mind in this household," Sirius snapped. "Go to bed, Regulus. There's school in the morning."

He turned off the lights and slipped into his bed. The sweet air of Venice drifted over them from the open window, and Sirius, for the first time, felt sorry that he had ever said anything bad about his home city. Oddly, he thought he was going to miss it.

"The guy who leads them. Calls himself Lord Voldemort."

The name sent a shiver crawling over Sirius's shoulders, and he shuddered, the dark night air suddenly turning unfriendly.

" _Sleep_ , Regulus."

Silence.

"Goodnight, Sirius."

No answer.

* * *

The station was always loud and warm and chaotic, just the way Sirius liked it. His picture-perfect family stood cold and frowning in a shadowy corner, Regulus wearing another _stupid_ suit. All of summer, he had felt like an alien, now _they_ were the strangers.

Regulus shuffled awkwardly behind him as his brother easily threaded his way through students.

The shimmering scarlet train was a magnificent sight to sore eyes. Sirius grinned widely when he saw it. Regulus slunk off to join his silver and green clad friends, but someone punched Sirius in the back.

He doubled over. "Prongs, you bastard."

"Good to see you too, Padfoot." James Potter, chocolate skin and eyes, messy black hair, glasses on the edge of his nose. Peter Pettigrew, a slightly chubby boy with blond hair and wide, excited eyes threw his arms around Sirius.

"Oh God, get off!" Sirius hissed, shoving the boy away from him. "We're _men_ , Wormtail, we don't _hug_."

"Oh." said Peter, blinking. "Right."

"Moony's saving us a seat," James said, helping Sirius with his trunk. "Come on."

"Seen Lily yet?"

James shot him a sly smile. "You bet."

When James triumphantly threw open a compartment door, a fiery haired girl talking fervently with Remus stared at him. Then she whipped around to look at Remus, who looked oddly guilty.

"You _said_ he wasn't coming, Remus!"

Remus produced a bar of chocolate from his pocket. "Consider me bribed."

Before she could escape, James had blocked the doorway and had produced a bouquet of roses from his wand. "Will you go out with me, Lily Evans?"

"When hell freezes over, you wanker," Lily scowled, setting fire to the roses. She flounced out the door, James staring dreamily after her. "What a woman," he commented, when Sirius shot him in the face with a jet of water to put out the flames.

Remus sighed. "She's not going to talk to me for a month."

"Worth it," James replied, handing him two more chocolate bars.

Remus grinned. "Keep it coming, Prongs, keep it coming." He shoved a piece of chocolate in his mouth, then tossed a piece to Peter, who dropped it.

Sirius threw himself into the seat, grinning widely.

James grinned back at him, settling back comfortably. He snapped a chocolate frog in half and tossed it to Sirius. "Welcome back, Padfoot dear."

Sirius swallowed the chocolate. "Good to be back, Prongsy." The train began to chug along. Sirius stuck his head out the window and spotted his family. He cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted:

"SEE YOU NEXT YEAR, MOTHERFUCKERS!"

* * *

 **A/N: Words cannot express how weird I feel writing this. The Marauders are perfect in my mind, and I, a mere mortal, should NEVER have been allowed to write a FANFIC about them. But here I am lololololol**

 **Review?**


	3. Together Again

_Chapter 2  
_

It was hours after the Sorting, everyone was in bed. Except four _incredibly_ immature boys.

The firelight was soft in the Gryffindor Common Room, AKA home turf for the Marauders. Sirius had taken his hair out and had his feet propped up on the table; James's glasses were residing in Sirius's lap, Remus had _finally_ put his books away, and Peter was dumping vodka into his coffee.

Peter had a problem with staying awake on school nights. The problem increased when you had _his_ particular friends.

His red-and-gold tie wrapped securely around his head, James made the first move.

In Exploding Snap.

"OHHHHH!" The other boys chorused loudly, and James knocked back a shot. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand.

"How'd you get this in, Padfoot?"

Sirius smirked lazily at him, tucking his arms around his head. "I have my ways."

"Sirius _flirted_ with Dumbledore," Peter giggled. Remus rolled his eyes.

James's expression turned to one of mock hurt. "I thought you only flirted with _me_."

Sirius batted his eyelashes innocently. "What can I say? He's got a sexy beard."

Remus choked on his Firewhiskey. "That's enough alcohol for you, Sirius." He grabbed Sirius's flask and dumped it into Peter's coffee. Peter looked despairingly at it. "I don't want to be hungover in class, guys," he whined, sniffing his coffee suspiciously.

"We're _always_ hungover in class." Remus replied, raising an eyebrow.

Peter opened his mouth as if to reply, then abruptly shut it. "True." Sirius generously added a little more to his coffee.

Peter took a sip, then swallowed. "This is disgusting."

"Wanna play a game?" James suddenly interrupted. His brown eyes were dangerously bright.

Sirius groaned. James had the _lowest_ alcohol tolerance _ever_. And yet, he drank the most. Besides him, of course. "We _are_ playing a game."

James stood up, wobbling. "Let's try to get into the Girls' Dormitory."

"You're crazy." Sirius told him.

"He's drunk." Remus corrected. "James, maybe you should go to bed."

"No thanks, _Mom_ ," James said sassily, fist on his hip. He teetered over to the girls' stairs. "Watch this!" He stumbled into them and like a crack of thunder, was blasted into the opposite wall.

The other three boys crowded around him. James pried his face from the floor, grinning. "Again!"

He ran into the barrier again, and was blasted back once more.

He looked up at Remus, eyes shining. "Maybe if you do a Shield Charm, you can play _badminton_ with the _barrier_. Like, with me. As the ball."

"It's called a shuttlecock." Peter said unhelpfully.

James giggled immaturely. "Shuttle _cock_."

"I'm not good at badminton." Remus told him. "And you're not good at being a ball."

"A _shuttlecock_."

"I'm good at badminton." said Sirius unnecessarily.

He had spoke too soon. James was blasted a third time from the barrier.

He lay face-first on the floor for about two minutes.

"Should we take him to the Hospital Wing?" asked Peter thoughtfully.

Silence.

"Nah," said Sirius and Remus together.

Remus checked the time. "It's four in the morning. Let's shove him into bed."

"Or we can just leave him here," Sirius said, looking distastefully at James's fallen body.

"Sirius!"

"What?"

Remus bent down and hoisted one of James's arms over his shoulders, groaning as he stood up. "Help me, one of you idiots."

"You," said Sirius and Peter, pointing at each other. Both of them whipped out their hands and played a quick game of rock-paper-scissors.

"Sirius, you can't _do_ gun! That's cheating!"

As Sirius was about to run for the stairs, James broke free of his delirious state and latched onto him. "You didn't do a Shield Charm," he mumbled sleepily, yawning.

"Please don't throw up on me." squeaked Sirius. "This is my favorite leather jacket."

James chuckled evilly.

Remus slung James's opposite arm around his shoulders. "James, if you throw up on him, you're banned from alcohol. For a _month._ "

"A _month?_ "

"A _month_."

And Peter ate chips while his friends lugged James up the stairs and tossed him into his bed.

"Goodnight," he said cheerily, and James puked.

"James, you disgusting tosser!"

* * *

Lily Evans was probably the prettiest girl in the entire world.

No, not probably. Definitely. _Definitely_ the prettiest girl in the entire world. Her flaming red hair was messily thrown into a braid, she wore minimal makeup, and you could see the stars in her emerald eyes from a million miles away. Best of all, was her glittering smile. Unfortunately not aimed at _him_.

James stared dreamily at her, elbow propped up on the table. His waffles and bacon were untouched. Sirius quietly snuck them to his plate and ate them, smiling evilly at Remus.

"Wake up, you creep." Remus smacked James in the back of the neck. "I have no idea how you've ever gotten a girlfriend."

"Because of me," Sirius explained through a mouthful of food. "I'm hot. And convincing."

"Not _that_ hot or convincing." James told him, shaking himself out of his temporary reverie. "Because you've never helped me ask out Lily."

Sirius put a hand to his heart in mock hurt. "You wound me! What about the little surprise we cooked up last night together?"

"You _encouraged_ him?" Remus demanded.

"So did Wormtail!" Sirius pointed a finger at Peter and hid under the table.

Peter looked down guiltily. "I brought them snacks."

"Oh yeah, the surprise," James perked up. "I think she'll like this one."

"She hates them all." Remus deadpanned. "Honestly."

"This one's pretty all-out," Sirius defended, reaching over Remus to grab the flask of pumpkin juice.

"They're all-out _every_ year," Peter pointed out.

"Oh, shut up," said Sirius. "Let him live his Lily-worshipping life."

James stared hard at Lily, and she looked at him, frowned, and looked away.

"I'm getting there." said James, leaning back in satisfaction.

His friends looked at him with a mixture of pity and disgust in their eyes.

"Sure, mate." said Sirius consolingly, patting his friend's back.

Breakfast commenced, with Sirius _literally_ wolfing down food. James ate little, Remus ate everything with chocolate, and Peter just ate everything.

When the clock struck, James froze and grinned at Sirius. "It begins," he said dramatically, and the four friends looked toward the teachers' table, Remus in despair.

 _BOOM._

Fireworks exploded throughout the hall, dragons and unicorns and every creature imaginable spilling off the walls in brilliant colors. An enormous purple firework lion climbed out of the Gryffindor table and roared, making the tapestries shake. A snake attempted to bite Snape's head. He ducked.

Everyone clapped and cheered, and nodded at each other. _The Marauders_ , they said, shaking their heads and smiling. _Every. Single. Year._

As if on cue, everyone looked directly at Lily Evans, who looked like she wanted to sink into the floor.

A small firework rose popped around her head, and the walls of the school turned a blushing pink.

Rose petals fell delicately around her.

 _Lily Evans, will you go out with me?_ was written in sparkles in the air. Everybody chuckled. Dumbledore twinkled.

"ONE DAY," Lily said loudly, glaring daggers at James, who was grinning like a cat. "I WILL KILL YOU, POTTER."

"Oh, I'm getting to her," whispered James to Sirius.

She shot a hex at him, and he ducked.

"What beauty, such grace!" sang Sirius, also dodging a hex. "By the way, Evans, your hair looks great today."

"Thank you." Lily snapped.

"You prat, _I_ was going to say that!"

Sirius raised an eyebrow. "That's _definitely_ not what we rehearsed yesterday."

"I hate boys!" Lily shouted, and flounced out of the Great Hall, steam billowing in her wake.

The Great Hall erupted back into it's usual laughter and brightness, Snape sinking into his chair, glaring at the Marauders. The teachers, sighing in consternation, were left to clean up James's mess.

Remus sighed. "She'll never go out with you if you do it like _that_ , James."

"And what do _you_ know of romance, my scarred friend?" James replied haughtily, loosening his tie.

" _Clearly_ more than you." Remus pointed at the still sparkling question in the air.

James looked at it for a moment, then his face split into a wide grin. "By Jove, you're right! Her favorite color is _red_ not _pink!_ " He slapped his forehead in sheepish delight. "I'm an idiot!"

Remus wore the expression of a toad. "That's _exactly_ what I was talking about."

"Lighten up, Remus," whispered Sirius. "One day he'll realize that he was meant for Moaning Myrtle, and he'll get over it."

"Yeah," said Peter. "It's not like he'd ever _really_ ask her out."

* * *

 **A/N: Why am I still writing a story about these 70's Losers?**

 **Because I'm crazy and I love them.**

 **Also, please review? For meeeeeeeeee?**


	4. Musical Talent

_Chapter 3_

"Here's an idea. Why don't I _really_ ask her out?"

"You're mental." said Sirius.

The four of them sat in detention, doomed to alphabetically organize all the books in their Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. Even though Remus had repeatedly assured their teachers that he had _nothing_ to do with the prank that morning, he was still shoved in because the four of them happened to be a package deal.

So, sour-tempered, he lobbed a book at James's head. "Maybe that'll knock some sense into you."

"No, really," James said, picking up the book and rubbing the side of his head. "Girls love romantic stuff. What if we have a midnight picnic?"

"That's if she actually agrees to go on a date with you." Peter pointed out.

"Oh yeah." James frowned. "That could be a potential problem." He brightened. "No, it wouldn't! Picture this, mates. I just ask her out. On bended knee. Roses. All that shit."

"Yes, on bended knee," Remus commented drily. "The perfect position in which she can repeatedly kick you in the face."

Sirius tried to hide his laugh into a cough. "He's got a point, mate."

"Maybe you should try actually waiting more than four hours to ask her out." Peter suggested. Sirius and James looked at him like he had a poinsettia sprouting from his left ear.

"Simply preposterous, Wormtail."

"Bordering on the imbecilic."

"I _thought_ we raised you better."

"Please shut up." Remus said, rubbing his temples.

There was a silence as they filled up the _H_ section of the bookshelf.

Then James pounced on Sirius, making the other boy scream and knock the pile of books in Peter's arms to the pinkie toe of Remus's left foot. Remus blanched.

"I just had the most _fantabulous_ idea!" James squealed excitedly.

"Ow." Remus squeaked.

James got off of Sirius. "We're all musically talented, right?"

"No." said Remus.

"We can all sing, right?"

"No." said Remus.

"We could perform a dance routine _while_ singing if we wanted to, right?"

"No." said Remus.

"Then," James said, grinning like a kid on his birthday. "I've just found the _perfect_ way to ask Lily out." As he explained his plan, the horrified feeling in the pit of Remus's stomach grew.

When he finished, he clapped his hands together. "How about it?"

"Holy mother of John the Baptist." commented Sirius.

"I don't think I'm confident enough for a singing and dance routine," Peter put in fretfully.

"No." said Remus.

"Pleeeease?" James whined pitifully.

Sirius rubbed his face. "How do we _always_ get roped into these?"

"It'll be fun!" James punched him in the arm.

"No girl will ever date me again." Sirius said thoughtfully. "My reputation will go to the dogs." He sniggered. "Dogs. Heh. Geddit?" He pointed very obviously at himself.

"And we'll be in detention again." Peter sighed sorrowfully.

"There's no rule against _singing_ ," James punched Peter in the shoulder.

"Ow."

James looked hopefully at Remus.

"Come on, Moony. For me?"

"I cannot and will not sing, Prongs." Remus said staunchly, wearing his stoniest expression.

James sighed dramatically.

Silence.

"I was hoping to save these for a better time," he said, "but I have no choice." He withdrew a bag of chocolates from inside his cloak. Remus's jaw dropped.

James waved it slyly in front of his face. "Are you drooling, Moony?"

Remus wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. "You wish."

"No, I wish you'd sing with us." James said. He sighed sadly. "I guess you won't." He began to put the bag back inside his cloak.

"WAIT!"

"Doyoupromisewithallyourheartandwon'tgobackonit?" asked James quickly, pulling out the bag once more.

Remus snatched it from him. " _My precious_ ," he hissed, freeing the chocolate from it's prison.

" _Remus_."

"Fine, fine, I'll lower my self-esteem to up my chance of diabetes." Remus replied cheerfully. "When do we start?"

"Now."

* * *

Lily Evans, the most envied girl in the entire school, ( _every_ girl thought James Potter was pretty hot) (besides Lily, obviously) (well, she thought he was hot too) (come on, she's not _blind_ ) was walking innocently from Charms to Potions.

She smiled at Professor Slughorn. "Good morning, sir." she said, dipping her head. "How are you?"

"Good, good," Professor Slughorn replied jovially. He shook her hand. "How was your summer, Miss Evans?"

"Too long," Lily replied truthfully. "I couldn't wait to come back."

But Professor Slughorn was looking at something behind her, a hint of a smile on his wrinkled face.

"Sir...?" Lily turned around, and immediately wanted to smash her face into the wall.

James Potter, with red roses ( _how_ did he know her favorite color?) was wearing a bow tie and a smarmy smile. "Lily Evans, most beautiful girl in all of Hogwarts," he began dramatically. "Also breaker of hearts and probably my arm, who has repeatedly rejected me throughout my years, please accept these flowers."

Lily rolled her eyes and took the flowers.

"They're lovely, Miss Evans." Slughorn said, eyes twinkling.  
"You can have them, sir." she said, handing them to him. "I have a million in my ro—"

"AND THIS SONG!"

Three other figures appeared next to James, all strumming air-guitars. The only ones that were really into it were James and Sirius.

" _Lily, won't you accept my heart?_

 _I can't bear it when we're apart!_

 _My favorite thing is your smile,_

 _Please, won't you stay awhile!_

 _Oh, Lily, Lily, don't go breaking my heart!_ "

They shimmied around Lily. _I'm sorry_ , Remus mouthed at her.

She raised an eyebrow. _Chocolate?_

He grinned.

" _Lily, Lily, please don't go breaking my heart!_ "

Applause filled the hallway, even Slughorn. The screams of excited fangirls were soon heard, and the four took off for their lives, James turning around to yell, "You look gorgeous, Lily!"

"Detention, Potter! Tonight at eight! Bring your friends!" yelled Slughorn after them. He turned to Lily, grinning. "What a lucky lady you are, Miss Evans."

"More like cursed to have him around me forever," she grumbled, following her professor into the classroom.  
"James Potter is a good boy." Slughorn told her, shuffling his papers around. "I like him."

"Extraordinarily pigheaded." Lily ticked off on her fingers. "Cocky. Arrogant. No care at all for school. Treats others like they're less than him. Behaves like he's a king—"

"More like a _god_ , Lily darling." James Potter, the devil himself, sauntered into the classroom. "I believe this is my class, sir."

He sat down next to Lily. She fiercely ignored him.

"I wrote it myself, you know." he said cockily. "Look at this. Sheet music. Though Sirius choreographed the dance."

"Don't you have a life?" slipped out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

His smirk was brilliant. "My life is you, Lily-flower."

She groaned, putting her head on her desk. "I'm going to throw myself out a window."

"I'd catch you."

"On second thought," she said, glaring daggers at him. "I'll throw _you_ out a window."

"Sirius will catch me."

"See? Exactly why I can't date you, Potter." she said, throwing up her hands.

"Wait, what? Why?"

"Because if I started dating you, I'd also be dating your idiotic friends."

* * *

 **A/N: I wrote two chapters in a day. In a DAY. I don't have a life either, James.**

 **Review?**


	5. First Moon

_Chapter 4_

"She called _us_ idiotic?" Sirius exclaimed, throwing a hand over his heart. "Prongs, this relationship is toxic."

"I mean," said Remus drily. "It's not like we performed a tribal dance around her while singing."

Sirius sniffed importantly. "That's art, Remus, you wouldn't understand."

They were all in detention, except for Peter. Slughorn thought Peter was their slave and was forced into doing whatever the other three of them did. What lies.

Peter, at the moment, was stuffing his face in the kitchen with the House Elves. If only Slughorn knew.

"Quidditch trials are coming up," James said suddenly. "Sirius, you already have a guaranteed spot on the team."

"You're the man, Captain."

"Moony, you want to try out?" James asked, looking at his friend.

Remus gave a harsh laugh. "You're joking, right?"

"Okay, okay, you hate Quidditch. Weirdo."

A knock came at the door. "Yeeeeeeeeeees?" called Sirius.

"It's me," whispered someone. "Open the door, you lot!"

The three of them rushed at the door and pulled it open, to reveal a smirking Peter. "You don't have to thank me," he said, and held out an enormous tray of food.  
"Lord Pettigrew," said James, taking the tray and shutting the door behind his friend. "You are kind of great."

Sirius took a noisy bite of an apple. "Why are you always bringing us food?"

* * *

Remus settled down in the library. The sun was setting, and the bookshelves were painted with a beautiful gold light. The musty smell of paper clouded over him and he took a deep, content breath. Besides being with his friends, this was where he felt most at home.

He squashed himself into an armchair and pulled out his books, quills, and parchment. Dipping the tip of his quill into a deep red inkwell, he chewed on the quill and thought about what the first words of his essay should be.

The sound of another person clunking down next to him broke him out of his reverie. A flurry of dark red waves clouded his vision and he smiled. "Hey, Evans."

" _Lily_ , call me Lily, Remus." she said, quickly throwing her hair into a knot at the nape of her neck. Lily Evans's smile was the loveliest thing in the entire world, and even if you weren't obsessed with her like James, it was an undisputed fact.

She pulled her legs up onto the armchair. "Where are your friends?"

A smile pulled at the corner of Remus's mouth. "Why? Looking for someone?"

" _Definitely_ not that Potter," she huffed, hair escaping from her bun. "I hope he gets expelled."

 _Oh, he's getting to her_ , Remus thought to himself in satisfaction and a slight twinge of surprise.

Lily, besides his friends and Dumbledore, was the only one who knew the truth about him. In fact— she was the first person he told when he came to school. And she smiled at him and told him that she thought he was very brave, and she respected him. If there was one girl Remus believed James deserved, it was Lily. Both were unnaturally kind, unnaturally forgiving, and unnaturally wonderful.

"He won't get expelled," Remus replied, dotting one of his i's. "Dumbledore loves him."

Lily huffed, her cheeks turning pink. "I don't understand why. He's absolutely horrid."

Remus looked at her and frowned. "Lily."

"He is!"

"Covering up a crush?" Sirius materialized from behind Remus. He bumped his friend's shoulder. "What's up, Moony? Stealing James's one true love?" He tossed him a chocolate bar.

"All your teeth are going to go bad." Lily said, breathing hard from Sirius's sudden appearance. (We all do that, Lily.)

"I'll risk it."

"Remus lives on the wild side." Sirius waggled his eyebrows at Lily. "You want to have a go, Evans?"

" _Black!_ " Lily's entire face was red. "I-I— don't even know what to say to you!" She stood up, completely flustered and gathering up her papers.

Remus shoved Sirius away from him. "Lily, sit down. He'll go away soon." He turned to his friend, raising an eyebrow. "What do you want?"

"It's confidential." Sirius said snidely, immaturely sticking his highly attractive tongue out at Lily, who glared at him.

Remus sighed, looked up at the heavens, counted to ten, then back at Sirius. "Fine, write it here." He shoved a piece of parchment towards him.

Sirius made a great show of hiding whatever he was writing from Lily, who looked ready to explode. Then:

"Here," he said dramatically, flourishing the parchment at Remus's face.

"Thanks."

Sirius curtsied to Lily then skipped out of the library.

"Mental," Lily murmured, watching him wiggle his butt at her from the door. Madam Pince nearly punched him in the face.

"I agree entirely," Remus replied, scanning the parchment. The blood drained from his face, and he seemed to gain another ten years to his face. Lines that hadn't been there from moments ago appeared near his eyes and mouth.

"Lily, I have to go," he said hurriedly, gathering up his things and putting them in his bag. His eyes were dull.

Lily, sensing the change in the atmosphere, frowned. "Are you alright, Remus?"

"Full moon." he forced through gritted teeth. "No choice. Don't go out tonight, Lily." He gave her a half-smile. "Study here tomorrow?"

Lily looked at him sadly, then nodded. "Sure." She stood up and hugged him impulsively. "It's not your fault, Remus."

Remus gave a bitter bark of laughter. "Thanks, Evans."

The lighting itself in the library seemed to dim when he left.

* * *

"So I was thinking that we could have our own theme song," James was saying when Remus entered the room. "Oh, hey, Moony!" He turned back to Peter. "Anyway—"

Sirius was ruffling through James's trunk to find the Invisibility Cloak. "There is absolutely no way that all of us are fitting under this anymore." he said, distastefully tossing it to the floor.

"Hey!" James said, grabbing the Cloak. "This thing is like a million years old! Jesus." He reverently stroked it's edges.

"Sirius is right," Remus said, the words feeling foreign on his tongue. (Sirius was _never_ right.) "You and Sirius can go under it alone."

Sirius and James gasped. "But we _always_ go together."

Remus glared at them. "I'm _allowed_ to go out. No one will notice a rat through the halls. But a stag and a huge black dog? I think not."

"True," Sirius and James said together, nodding sagely.

Remus rubbed his face. They were doing that synchronization thing again.

"But," the two of them raised their hands. "We can only shift outside."

"Sure." Peter nodded. "Except for me." He glanced at his watch. "Okay, students are in bed. Remus is due at Dumbledore's office in three minutes." He looked at his friend. "We'll join you in exactly four minutes."

But Remus was already gone.

* * *

As Dumbledore bade him a sad smile, Remus was alone in the Shrieking Shack.

He hated this moment. It happened to him every month, but he never got over it.

The first shock of pain hit him. He gasped, doubling over. His knees hit the floor. He whispered a fervent prayer before he slammed his head on the table.

His mind was a cloudy haze, his eyes went in and out of focus. Wave after wave of pain hit him again and again. A choked sob emerged from his throat. Fangs made his lips bleed. His hands were turning into claws.

And then— arms. Familiar, dark arms. And a voice. Two voices, soothing and low. Idiot, idiot voices for coming in here with him, but kind voices, good voices. They didn't hurt him. They didn't make him bleed.

"It's alright, Moony. We're here." James's voice floated down to him, the voice of an angel. He could smell Sirius's Italian cologne. A tiny rat skittered around near his foot, also seeming to encourage him.

He ripped through his shirt, and screamed.

Sirius and James were out of the shack in a flash. Even they knew that it was dangerous now.

Black and purple and a mellow green— Remus screamed again.

 _I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man_ , he thought desperately, as his snout appeared and his claws raked the floor. He tasted blood on his bottom lip from his own fangs.

 _I'm a wolf_.

* * *

They were dancing through the forest, flashes of silver and gold and black— souls caught up in a whirlwind of man and beast.

In school it was never taught how wonderful it really was to have an Animagus. It was a forbidden, wonderful, delicious thing to be free.

And they really were free. Free in a way you couldn't explain if you were human. And when before the forest was a cloudy mystery, now it was their home.

Human, they were outcasts, but at night— they were kings.

They settled near the lake, four humans trapped inside animals, and stared over the glassy water. It was a strange group— a wolf, a rat, a stag and a dog, but their reflections on the water were reflections of boys, of friends that would rather die than face any peril alone.

And slowly, as the sun rose over the horizon, the skin of the animals melted, until only four boys remained. One of them collapsed to the ground, and the three of them solemnly sat down next to him.

It was hours later till Remus woke up.

"He's alive!" Sirius cheered, crawling over on his hands and knees. "How are you feeling, Moony?" The other two boys hovered anxiously over him.

Remus looked at his three friends, and then he smiled wearily. How he had missed them over summer vacation. Who was he to deserve these wonderful people?

"Lucky."

* * *

 **A/N: Remus Lupin makes me happy.**

 **Review: Who's your favorite Marauder? It's impossible for me to decide, but what about you guys?**


	6. Detention With McGonagall

_Chapter 5_

"Black!"

Sirius slid innocently into the desk next to James, who grinned at him. _You're dead_ , he mouthed.

"Yes, Professor?" Sirius batted his eyelashes up at a young, pretty Professor McGonagall.

Minerva McGonagall gritted her teeth. "You're late. Detention, Black. At eight."

"Wait, alone?" Sirius said, cutting the act, eyes widening in horror. "Professor, I can't do detention without my mates with me!"

"Oh, you certainly can, Mr. Black." said McGonagall in satisfaction. "At eight o'clock. Don't be late." She turned back around and continued her lesson.

Sirius leaned back in his chair, frowning. James watched him with a mischievous light in his eyes. It was Sirius's thinking look.

"Prongsie, I'm not serving detention tonight."

* * *

"You're crazy. Batshit crazy." James was grinning like a cat. Peter looked awkward. Remus looked sick to his stomach.

"It's foolproof." Sirius said confidently. "And then we can camp in the Forbidden Forest!"

"I sense a pattern," Remus said drily, raising an eyebrow. "One stupid idea after another."

"You're _awfully_ saucy on Wednesdays, Remus," sniffed Sirius.

"You cannot _flirt_ with Professor _McGonagall!_ " Remus burst out. "It's absurd! Out of all the teachers— _McGonagall?_ "

"Okay, McGonagall is _not_ bad-looking," James defended. He thought. "I mean, she'd be hotter with red hair, but—"

"What is it with you and red _hair_ , James?"

"A bet! A bet! A bet!" Peter suddenly shouted, scrambling towards them. "If Sirius gets out of detention before eight thirty, he gets fifteen Galleons. If not— James gets fifteen Galleons."

"Brilliant." said Sirius.

"Su _perb_." said Remus. (With a touch of sarcasm.)

"Lily Evans." said James.

They all looked at him like he was crazy.

"What?" he said defensively. "It's a synonym."

Silence.

"Wait, is it really?" Peter asked, eyeing his friends. "Can I look it up in the Thesaurus?"

Silence.

"Wait, you have a _Thesaurus?_ "

* * *

James slid into the seat next to Lily, who steadfastly ignored him.

He ruffled through his bag. "Hey, Evans, you have a quill I could borrow?"

She shot him a contemptuous look.

"Aha, thank you," said James, plucking her quill from her fingers.

"Hey!" Lily reached over and grabbed it back. "This is _mine_ , Potter!"

Quick as lightning, it was in his hands again. He smiled innocently at her. "Pay attention, Evans. Slughorn is doing notes."

"Give it _back!_ "

Nimbly, he threaded through her furious attacks, still grinning at her.

She punched him in the shoulder.

"OW!"

Slughorn turned around, frowning. "Mr. Potter? Is anything the matter?"

"No, sir." replied James through a false smile, gritting his teeth.

"You've got a mean right hook, Evans," he muttered to her out of the side of his mouth when Slughorn turned back around. Lily hid a secretive smile.

"I'll punch you again if you don't give me back my quill." she said haughtily, extending her hand.

"No, thanks, I like this quill." James replied, beginning to chew on the end of it, eyes fixed firmly to the board.

"Potter, stop contaminating my things!"

He smiled slyly at her. "I can contaminate you too, if you'd like."

Two seconds later, James's hair was on fire.

"Mr. Potter!"

"It's alright! It's alright, sir!" James panted, when Remus, who was sitting in the front, blasted a jet of water at him.

"Goodness," huffed Slughorn. "Please sit down, and dry yourself off. No more outbursts, Mr. Potter."

Lily smiled sweetly at him when he collapsed in the seat next to her.

"Here," he grumbled, tossing the quill at her. "You're too pretty for your own good, Evans."

* * *

Sirius Black sauntered into detention fifteen minutes late.

" _Evening_ , Professor." he said, shooting McGonagall a brilliant smile. "I take it you're doing well?"

"I'm grading papers, how well can I be?" McGonagall replied tightly. "You will be staying fifteen minutes extra for your tardiness."

She stood up and went over to him, slamming books on his desk. "The spines of all these books are damaged." She pointed towards a pile in the corner. "You will repair all of them tonight."

Sirius choked. "All of them?"

McGonagall gave him a very Slytherin-esque smirk. "I expect no less." She went back to her desk.

Sirius attempted the re-binding of some books, then gave up. He went over to McGonagall's desk.

"Yes?" She looked at him over her glasses.

"How about I grade some of those papers instead?" Sirius asked bluntly.

She frowned at him. "Preposterous. You yourself failed."

"Give them all B minuses!" Sirius suggested.

McGonagall's mouth tightened even further. "Mr. Black, I gave you a job and I expect you to adhere to it, lest you want to spend more detentions with me."

Sirius seized his chance. He slipped on his best cat-like smirk. "Oh, but Professor, I _do_."

McGonagall nearly choked. "S-sorry?"

He sat on her desk. She edged away from him.

"You know, Minerva, I can call you Minerva, right?"

"You definitely cannot!" she said indignantly, but with a touch of healthy fear.

He ignored her outburst. "She's the Roman goddess of wisdom, were you aware?"

"Of course I was, Mr. Black," she sniffed. "I'm very well-learned in the ideas of Muggle mythology."

"I think you fit the name rather well," he said innocently.  
She scowled at him. "Thank you."

"I hear a couple fourth years are selling homemade butterbeer down the hall," Sirius said sweetly. "I'd love to try some."

"Later." McGonagall was putting on her brave face.

"We could go together if you'd like," Sirius twisted McGonagall's quill in his fingers.

McGonagall pulled at her collar. "No thank you." She was sweating.

"That's fine," Sirius said, transfiguring two piping hot cups of tea from McGonagall's quills. "Here, take one." It was a very intricate piece of Transfiguration magic, and Sirius was well aware of that fact.

"I'm not thirsty?" McGonagall squeaked, when Sirius pulled up a chair at her desk. He was much taller than her.

"You look very nice today, Professor," said Sirius smoothly.

That was _it_. "You're free to go, Mr. Black," she said, quickly standing up and trying to catch her breath. "No need for anymore time."

"But, Professor?" said Sirius innocently. "I thought you said—"

"I misspoke!" she interrupted quickly. "Now go, go drink your butterbeer, do your homework—"

Sirius was already halfway out the door.

Minerva took in a deep breath when he left. She rubbed her sweaty palms together.

Sirius Black, no matter how frustratingly annoying, was a _very_ handsome young man.

* * *

When Remus, Peter, and James reentered the Common Room, they nearly screamed at the sight of Sirius lounging lazily on the couch, doing his Transfiguration homework.

"You're back from detention already?" Remus asked incredulously.

"You're doing _homework?_ " asked James in horror.

Sirius smirked. "Peter, what's the time?" he asked, knowingly grinning at James.

"Eight— eight _twenty eight_."

Sirius laughed jovially. "Pay up, _mio amico_."

James tossed a couple galleons at Sirius. "You better have not spoken Italian to McGonagall."

Sirius slapped his forehead in dismay. "I forgot how much girls love that!"

* * *

When Transfiguration class rolled around the next day, McGonagall caught Sirius's eye and said, "Um, no homework." and shooed them out of class early.

"I think she blushed, mate," said James in wonder.

Sirius smirked conceitedly. "What can I say? If _I_ was the one pursuing Lily, we would have already been dating."

* * *

 **A/N: I could _not_ write this chapter seriously, mates. I had this strange idea in my head, and I just wrote it. Simple as that. I'm crazy, fellas. And I'm pretty sure real-life McGonagall would have slapped Sirius across his smarmy, beautiful face.**


	7. Quidditch Tryouts

_Chapter 6_

"Ladies, gentlemen, line right up," James shouted over the raucous that was the Gryffindor team's tryouts.

Sirius was standing next to him, his long hair tied back, arms crossed over his chest like _he_ was the real team Captain. Peter was happily eating snacks on the bleachers and Remus was somewhere else, probably the library, studying.

A gaggle of giggling girls, or what Sirius and James called a GOGG, were huddled in groups and, well, giggling. Quidditch tryouts were a mess when fangirls got involved.

"Will everyone who is _not_ trying out please move over to the bleachers?" James said, sounding irritated. The only thing James was actually serious about was Quidditch. The GOGG sadly moved from the field to the bleachers, wiggling their fingers at Sirius as they left.

"Alright, Seekers, Chasers, Beaters, Keepers. Four groups. Are you paying attention?" James yelled. The noise began to die down.

"I'll start with Chasers," he said. "First up—" He choked. " _Lily?_ "

The redheaded girl glared at him defiantly. "What?"

"That's not fair!" someone shouted from the line, and a chorus of agreeing murmurs followed. "Everyone knows you fancy her!"

"Oi, shut up!" Sirius glared at the person. "There's no chance for _you_ , Yule, so you can leave while it's early."

"I want to play Quidditch." said Lily.

"And have you _ever_ played Quidditch?" James asked, voice strained.

Lily frowned defensively. "There's a first time for everything, Potter."

James sighed loudly and buried his face in his hands. "Go ahead, Evans." His voice sounded muffled and defeated.

Lily gathered her Gryffindor courage and kicked off the ground, soaring into the air. Her hands gripped her broom like it was her lifeline. Her knuckles were white in the cold morning air.

James peeked between his fingers and perked up. Her flying technique wasn't so bad. "You there," he said, jabbing his thumb at one of the kids standing in the Keeper line. "Get up there and defend."

When James was finally up hovering next to Lily, he could see she was shaking. "You're doing great, Lily." he said gently. "Here." He tossed her the Quaffle. "Try and score at that goalpost."

Lily was gripping her broom with her right hand and had the Quaffle tucked underneath her right armpit. "Okay," she said, and determinedly set off for the opposite side of the field.

When Lily tossed the ball, it was awkward and messy, and dropped to the earth like a stone. James sped underneath her and caught it. "No problem. You'll get it next time." he said, handing it to Lily, who was beet red.

She tried again, and it was even worse. The ball swerved in the opposite direction. The crowd below had started to titter.

"Third time's a charm," James said, tossing it to her, but she dropped it.

Lily wanted to die. She could _distinctly_ hear the laughter from down below. She huffed, blinking to hide her tears of embarrassment. "Never mind, Potter, I've changed my mind."

Hurriedly, she hit the ground, ignoring the snickers following her.

She could hear James jogging after her. "Listen, Lily—"

"Prongs, I'll handle this, you get back to the tryouts—" said Sirius pompously, then: " _Ow!_ "

"Get out of the way, you oaf," snarled another voice. Lily rubbed her hand across her eyes before she was tackled by a slender brunette girl.

Marlene McKinnon, the best best friend in probably the _world_.

"Fuck them!" Marlene swore. She turned to James. "She tried out because—"

"Marlene!" Lily hissed, shooting glances at James and Sirius.

"Shut up, Lily, I'm telling them—"

" _Marlene!_ "

"— _because_ of that fucking _girl_ and her fucking _friends_ and how they fucking _forced_ Lily to try out and everyone fucking _knows_ Alicia likes you, Potter—"

" _Marlene!_ " Lily covered her friend's mouth, blushing from embarrassment.

"...What?" said James.

"Can I just say," Sirius announced. "that _you_ need to wash your mouth, young lady!" He smirked and wiggled his eyebrows at her. " _Or—_ "

"I can guess the words coming out of your mouth, Black." interrupted Marlene. "So maybe you should come and wash your mouth out with me."

Sirius held up his hand, randomly pulled out a bottle of water, and swished it around his mouth. Then he spit at Marlene, who danced away in the nick of time. After which Sirius was shot in the face with an enormous jet of water. Marlene cackled.

"So...much...sexual...tension..." Lily said, shaking her head in disbelief.

James tore his eyes from his best friend and back to Lily. "Listen, Lily, I have to get back, but we'll talk about this later, okay? We can— we can go flying or something."

"I am _not_ going on a date with you, Potter." Lily said, eyes glinting in annoyance and crossing her arms.

James's patience was thinning. "You know what, Lily? I think you just keep up this act of playing hard to get because you're too stubborn to admit that you actually _like_ me. Well, wake up, because I've been waiting _seven years_ , and I'm sick and tired of you playing with me."

With that, he whirled around and angrily stalked back to the tryouts, where he barked at the people and made a second year girl cry.

Lily stared numbly after him, eyes wide.

Marlene touched her shoulder. "Did James _actually_ ask you out? Without the fireworks and the publicity?"

"What an uncharacteristic, gentlemanly move!" commented Sirius, propping up his chin with his elbow on Marlene's head, who scowled and shoved him off.

"Yeah," Lily said quietly. "Yeah, it was."

* * *

" _Drama_ went down at the Quidditch tryouts!" Peter sang happily, plopping himself down next to Remus, who raised his eyebrow. Sirius collapsed on his other side.

"Second years crying drama? Favoritism drama? James's unfair choosing drama?" Remus prompted, shutting his book and settling back for a good, long gossip chat.

Peter shook his head excitedly. "Lily and James drama."

Remus looked at him in confusion. "Lily went down to see the tryouts?"

"Lily _tried out_." Peter squealed.

"Shut up, Wormtail." James appeared in the doorway sourly.

There was a silence as he glared at them.

"You look like Satan," Sirius commented helpfully.

"I feel like Satan," James groaned, collapsing on the couch. Sirius fearfully edged away from him.

"Well, your hair is kind of demonic." Peter agreed.

"You know I actually _like_ Lily?" James suddenly burst out.

The three of them exchanged a look. James was about to rant.

"Yes, James, we know." Remus said patiently.

"Yeah, well, she acts like everything I do is fake!" he shouted. "Aren't girls supposed to like fireworks and flowers? It's _bullshit!_ "

"Bullshit." Sirius confirmed solemnly.

"Yeah, exactly!" he ranted loudly. "And— I don't know, maybe I should go for Alicia, or something."

The three of them gasped simultaneously and stood up in disagreement.

"No!" they chorused, aghast.

"McKinnon said she liked me!" James shouted. His anger was abating. The steam was coming off him in ripples instead of waves.

He sat down on the couch with his head in his hands. "I wish Lily liked me." He was the perfect picture of an angst-ridden teenager.

The three of them exchanged looks again. James never got _this_ worked up over Lily. Ever. He was even thinking of _abandoning_ his pursuing of her.

"Evans will come around, mate." Sirius said, tentatively patting James's head. Peter offered him his last cookie.

James took the cookie and somberly chewed on it. "Thanks."

"Maybe you should talk to her." Remus suggested cautiously, sitting next to him.

"She doesn't _want_ to talk to me!" James said. His anger levels were rising. Sirius and Peter glared at Remus.

"Never mind, never mind." Remus said hurriedly, offering him a tissue.

"I'm not _crying!_ "

"It's alright to cry," Sirius said calmly. "Let out the negative emotions."

"That's it, I'm leaving," James said, getting up and tantrum-ing his way out the door.

"Well, that went well." sighed Peter, as they all stared at his retreating back.

"Peachy." Sirius said.

* * *

Somehow, James ended up in the Astronomy tower.

He sat on the ground and glared up at the sky. "Fuck you, moon," he said, just because it made him feel better. "Fuck you, stars. Fuck you, night."

He cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted, "Fuck you, Lily Evans!"

"I'm not going to pretend that one didn't hurt."

James whipped around. Lily's hair was blowing around her face.

He turned back around and glared harder at the night.

Lily joined him at the balcony. "I tried out for Quidditch because Alicia said I couldn't play." she said quietly. "And I like proving her wrong. She likes you, by the way." She tried sounding nonchalant, but James could hear the underlying tone of annoyance in her voice.

"Anyway, I didn't get on the team. I expected that, I hate heights. And she said that you only like Quidditch girls, or something. She got on the team, I heard."

There was a silence.

"Alicia and I snogged under the staircase last week." James said randomly. He eyed her closely for a reaction.

She stiffened. "You're dating, then?"

James snorted. "Hell no. Lily, you do know that I've been asking you out every other day? You don't play Quidditch."

She didn't say anything.

"I kiss Quidditch girls because they're the exact _opposite_ of you and they actually _want_ to kiss me." James said. "Okay? Happy?"

Silence.

"I can't date you because you're so mean to Severus." she finally burst out tearfully. "Okay? He was my best friend. I couldn't do that."

James looked at her like she was crazy. "He's an asshole! He called you a-a— you-know-what! And have you _heard_ what he's been doing?"

"I know, I know!" She gave a strangled sort of sob. "But he was my friend, James."

James groaned and rubbed the back of his neck. "Are you actually telling me that you've rejected me all these years because of _Snivellus?_ "

"See? That's what I'm talking about!"

"Fine!" James yelled. He quieted. "Fine. I'll stop annoying Sniv—Severus. _Unless_ — unless he does something and deserves to get his ass kicked."

Lily gave him a look.

James sighed. "Look, Evans, you don't have to date me. Just— can't we try being friends?"

Lily played with her fingers. "I guess."

Silence.

"So... still up for going flying with me?" James asked hopefully. At the sight of Lily's outraged look, he quickly backtracked.

"As friends, I mean, as friends!" James added quickly. "Relax, Evans."

"Fine, but I get my own broom."

"Of course," James said, grinning widely at her. "Tomorrow night?"

"Alright." Lily said, and made to leave.

And James could've been seeing things— but he thought he saw her smiling.

* * *

When James reentered the Common Room, he was a different person than the James that left it.

He grinned at his mates, all sitting depressed on the sofas.

"What's up, chums?" he said, slapping Remus in the back. Remus choked on a cookie.

"What happened to you?" Sirius raised an eyebrow.

James was grinning like a kid on Christmas. "You're never going to believe it."

"Hurry up and tell us, James," said Remus, frowning at him.

James grinned wider. "I'm going on a date with Evans."

They all stared, openmouthed at him. Never, in all his seven years at Hogwarts had he successfully got Lily Evans to go out with him.

"You're joking," Peter breathed.

A mane of red hair appeared from the door. "It's not a _date_ , Potter!" Then turned into a scarlet whirlwind into the Girls' Dormitory.

The three of them looked from the Girls' Dormitory back to James, who smirked smugly at them.

"He's not joking," breathed Peter, and collapsed on top of Sirius.

* * *

 **A/N: This chapter makes me want to hide in a hole. Seriously, it's not even _funny_. Also, is it tryouts or try-outs? If it's not tryouts, then Microsoft Word lied to me. God, I need a beta. Any volunteers?**


	8. Snapes and Roses

_Chapter 7_

Severus Snape looked up from his Potions essay to see a radiant Lily Evans talking animatedly with Marlene McKinnon. He smiled faintly and a little sadly. Too bad that smile would never be directed at him anymore.

He watched James Potter easily sling an arm around Lily's shoulders, smirking at her while Sirius Black annoyed Marlene. Severus clenched his fists, a muscle twitching in his jaw. He stared down at the question on his parchment— _how and why would you apply shredded moonstone to make a Smooth Skin Potion?_

"Oh, you're still working on that?" Regulus Black slid in next to Severus. A few girls giggled and looked in his direction. Severus had never managed to make any girl look over towards _him_.

"Yes." he replied tightly and shortly, pulling the parchment closer to him and opening his Potions book. Regulus was a fellow Slytherin— he understood when another person wanted to be left alone. However, he didn't move away, just set his things on the table and began eating his breakfast.

A sudden excited murmur swept across the Great Hall, and Severus looked up, seeing the owls glide in from the window. _Right on time_.

Swallowing tightly and clenching his quill in his left hand, he watched a midnight black owl float over to Lily Evans and drop something in her lap. A single, perfect red rose.

There was no tag or letter attached; and Lily stared at the flower in confusion. Severus smiled secretively to himself.

"Are you going to eat that?" Regulus asked, pointing to a blueberry muffin sitting untouched on Severus's plate.

"Hmmm?" he said, pulling himself out of his daydream. "What?"

"Eat that," Regulus repeated, jerking his finger towards the muffin. Without waiting for a reply, he grabbed it and tossed it onto his plate. "Are you staring at Evans?"

"You're very blunt today," Severus replied, frowning. "And no, I'm not staring at Evans." He hesitated over her name.

"Whatever," Regulus replied, then picked up a copy of the _Daily Prophet_ that had been dropped over him. "Hey, look at this."

Severus wasn't paying attention. Marlene was helping Lily put the rose into her hair, and Potter looked murderous.

"Snape, are you listening?" Regulus prodded him in the shoulder. "It's that rebel group again. Voldemort, or whatever."

Severus looked at his friend. "Oh."

"They seem to be recruiting or something." said Regulus, skimming over the paper.

"Are you looking at the _Prophet?_ " Macnair grinned at Regulus. "I heard about Voldemort. Yeah, blasted a couple Muggles over a bridge." He laughed, and so did some of the other boys. Severus didn't.

"And he's sooooo handsome," put in Bellatrix Black, Regulus's cousin. She smirked flirtatiously at Severus, dragging a single nail across Voldemort's smirking, aristocratic face.

"But he's killing people," said Regulus, frowning a little in confusion. "He's bad, right? He should go to Azkaban."

" _Regulus!_ " Bellatrix shrieked, laughter evident on her features. "You've been spending too much time with your brother!" She shook her head, tears of mirth still sparkling in her eyes. "No _way_. He wants to make Europe a good place again, a great, Pureblooded society. Wouldn't that be wonderful? No more Mudbloods or Muggles to sully what should be _ours_."

"That's enough, Bella." Severus said quietly. "Regulus is young."

That was the wrong thing to say. "I'm not young," Regulus said, glaring at Severus.

"Stop babying him, dear Severus." said Bella, smirking at him. "Regulus, you should come with me and a couple of my friends to the Hog's Head this weekend."

Regulus shrugged uneasily, glancing at Severus and sending a quick look over to his brother. But Sirius Black was not paying attention to him. He turned back to Bella. "I'll think about it."

"Your cousin is crazy." Severus said quietly, when Bella had moved over to the other side of the table.

"Bella?" Regulus, looking at his beautiful cousin, who was laughing. "She's interesting. But she's strong. Opinionated. I admire that."

Severus gave a harsh laugh. "That's one way to put it." He looked very hard at Regulus. "Listen, don't go with Bella to the Hog's Head."

"Why not?" Regulus said, a twinge of annoyance flaring up in his eyes.

"She wants to do something about this," Severus stabbed the _Prophet_ with his paper. "She wants to join him. And she's trying to recruit us."

"What's wrong with that?" Regulus asked defiantly.

Severus's mouth fell open. "You yourself said it! They're _killing_ people!"

"They're not people!" Regulus shot back. "Just a couple Muggles. What loss is that?" He looked away.

"My father is a Muggle," Severus hissed, anger in his eyes.

"That's not my problem." Regulus replied, glaring at him. "She's right, you know. You're babying me. So does Sirius, so does my mother. I'm not a baby, I'm not young. Go back home to your Muggle failure of a father, Snivellus."

* * *

"That rose looks _so_ stupid in Lily's hair," James muttered to Sirius. "You should tell her."

" _I_ think it looks rather nice," put in Peter.

"Peter!" James hissed. " _No_ , it does not!"

"James is having an attack of jealousy," Sirius muttered to Peter. "Apparently someone, _not_ him, sent her that rose."

Peter's lips formed a round _O_.

"Who cares?" grumbled Remus.

James, Sirius, and Peter all glared at him.

"Oh, right," Remus mumbled sarcastically. "All of us."

A cream-colored envelope dropped onto Sirius's head, and he grabbed it. "It's from Andromeda," he said excitedly. "Favorite cousin of all time, hands down."

"Narcissa is okay, too." said Peter, blushing slightly.

They all stared at him. Sirius even momentarily paused from opening the envelope.

"I mean," said James, scratching his head. "She's hot."

Remus smacked him in the back of the head. "She's two years younger than you!"

"Have you even ever _spoken_ to Narcissa before?" asked Sirius incredulously, tearing open his letter and pulling out a piece of parchment.

"Yes, I have!" said Peter defiantly. "We're partners in Transfiguration." He blushed bashfully.

"She's dating Lucius Malfoy," said Lily, who had inexplicably joined their conversation. Sirius pretended to gag.

"He's hot too," defended Marlene. "They're both hot."

Lily sighed, shaking her head. "Hot people dating hot people."

"Natural selection, Lily darling," James said, as Sirius read over his letter and Peter shook his head wistfully.

He clapped James on the shoulder. "It's Dora's fourth birthday! And we're invited to the party!" James grabbed the letter and read it quickly, his smile growing.

"Mate, that's brilliant!" he said. "When?"

"Christmas," Sirius replied, rereading over James's shoulder.

"Who gave you that rose, Lily?" Remus asked, looking over at her.

Lily smiled, and shrugged. "I don't know."

"A secret admirer," Marlene said, and the two giggled madly. James looked like a thundercloud.

"Have you all been reading all that stuff about Voldemort?" Peter asked, who was eying a leftover copy of the _Prophet_ on their table.

All at once, the smiles on everyone's faces dropped. The mood darkened, like a storm hanging ominously over them.

"Yeah," sighed Lily. "Yeah, I have." She looked pensive.

* * *

Lily was standing at the Astronomy tower, curly hair whipping around her face. She was wearing a little more makeup, and had a nervous color to her.

She _knew_ James said that it was only a friendly date, but she couldn't help but be a little jumpy. It was true what he had said about her rejecting him all those years— but to believe she had actually _agreed_ to having a date with him was surreal and a little terrifying.

A hand touched her shoulder.

She whipped around, expecting James, but there was Severus, highlighted black and white by the moon.

"Lily." he said quietly.

She scrambled away from him. "Severus? What do you want?"

"Lily, I'm sorry about— that." he said, his voice strained. "I'm sorry. I want to be friends again."

"Severus, I-I can't," she said, wishing a thousand curses on James. Where was that prat when she needed him?

"I sent you that rose, Lily. It was me," he said, eyes darting where the scarlet flower was bound into her curls.

She touched it's soft petals. "Oh. Thank you."

"Floriography, the language of flowers," he said quickly. "Roses mean passion and courage and respect."

 _And 'I love you'_ , Lily thought, panicking slightly. "Oh, um, thanks." She went over to the door. "Listen, Severus, I have to go—"

"Lily, wait!" he said, grabbing her arm. He looked desperate. "I really am sorry. Please forgive me. I'll do anything."

Lily was dragged back to the Astronomy, looked despairingly at Severus's hopeful face.

 _Potter, you cad, where the hell are you?_

* * *

"Listen, Sirius, do I look more fuckable with _this_ tie?" asked James, posing in the mirror.

"I don't think it's possible to look fuckable with a face like that," Sirius said instead.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"You look like a dad." Sirius told him sincerely.

" _What?_ " James nearly screamed. "Do I have a dad bod?" He grabbed Remus. "Remus, do _I have a dad bod?!_ "

"Your body is perfect the way it is," Peter said kindly.

"Thanks, Peter," said James. "At least Peter thinks I'm fuckable."

Peter looked sick. "Okay, I never said _that—_ "

James waved it off. "It's what you meant."

Sirius was armed with a comb and hair gel, attempting to tame James's unruly black hair.

"It—won't—go—down," he said, grunting as he tried to flatten it with his elbow.

James groaned and put his face in his hands. "I'm going to die alone," he moaned.

"No, you won't," Remus said, looking up from his book. "Sirius will probably be there with you." He reflected on that for a minute. "Actually, on second thought, we'll all be there with you."

"Unless some miracle occurs and Narcissa Black gets with Peter," Sirius snorted, and Peter glared at him.

* * *

When James appeared at the Astronomy Tower, twenty minutes late, he was greeted by the sight of Snape and Lily standing uncomfortably close together.

He screamed.

Both of them whipped around and stared at him.

He cleared his throat. "I mean, Snape, get the hell away from Lily!" He marched pompously between them and pushed Severus away from them.

"Potter!" Lily scolded, running over to help him.

"What is _he_ doing here?" Snape spat in disgust, clutching onto Lily like a lost parasite. His hooked nose quivered.

"Lily," James glanced at her, who frowned at him. "I mean, my honey-sweet-raspberry-muffin-bread and I are going on a broomstick ride."

" _What?_ " Severus said, sounding disgusted, angry, and hurt.

"Severus, we have to go." Lily said, peeling his fingers off her arm. "I'm sorry."

"Why?" he asked, turning to her. "What does he have to offer you?"

"The question is, Snivellus, what do _you_ have to offer her?" James retorted, raising an eyebrow. "Come on, Lily."

And with a final apologetic glance, Lily disappeared into the shadowy darkness, gripping painfully onto James's arm.

"All of me." Severus whispered, his breath cloudy in the cold, and fell to his knees.

"I offer her all of me."

* * *

 **A/N: I have this weird issue of jumping from emotion to emotion. Humor to angst and back again is my style ;) Sorry about your sudden bipolar reading experience.**


	9. Gathering Storm

_Chapter 8_

Seniors, or Seventh Years, had full permission to leave Hogwarts and head to Hogsmeade when they didn't have class. So, as James Potter was flirting with Lily Evans thirty feet up in the air, Sirius Black and his cronies were enjoying something alcoholic down at the Three Broomsticks.

"Moony," said Sirius suddenly.

Remus glanced up at him. "What?"

"You need to get a girlfriend." he said sagely, nodding to himself. "Yes. Get a girlfriend."

Remus stiffened. "Why?"

"Yeah. Why?" Peter parroted curiously.

"You need to loosen up. Have some fun." Sirius explained. "You're boring as fuck."

"Thank you." Remus replied stiffly. "I'm quite loose, I assure you."

"See?" Sirius said, giving a bark of laughter. "Who says, 'I assure you'?"

"Or 'quite'?" Peter added, grinning at his friend.

Remus rolled his eyes. "I'm friends with the three of you." he said. "What makes you think that getting a girlfriend could make me break a couple rules?"

"Stop questioning my judgment, Moony," Sirius said, frowning at him. "Come on. Who's the hottest girl in here, right now?"

"Please shut up." Remus said, covering his face in his hands.

"Marlene McKinnon." Peter suggested. "She's cool. Actually, she and Remus would be a good couple, now that I think about it."

"McKinnon?" Sirius snorted, and Remus could've sworn a flash of worry danced through his black eyes. But it was gone in the next second. "Nah."

Remus glanced at the dark-haired girl sitting at a table with Alice and her boyfriend, Frank. He stared down into his drink.

"I dare you to ask her out, Remus," Peter said, grinning at him challengingly.

"No." Remus replied shortly. "I won't."

"Come _on_ ," Peter whined. Sirius remained tight-lipped.

" _No_ , Peter, I don't want a girlfriend!" Remus suddenly exploded. He was shaking. "Can you even imagine? What if we fall in love? What if we get married? What if— she got pregnant? Can you even imagine, a child inheriting the worst parts of _me!_ "

He was breathing heavily, fear rebounding on the inside of his brain.

He shook his head slowly. "No. _No_. I will not allow a child this fate. Not if it's my choice."

Silence.

"Well," said Sirius, taking a sip of his drink. "You could always use a condom."

Remus's head snapped up, eyes lighting up in fury. "You—"

" _Moony_. There you go again, acting like a selfless martyr, to starve yourself of love and friendship and joy, blah blah blah—" Sirius smiled gently at him, to assure him he wasn't making fun of him. "It's okay to be happy, you know. So you know what? Ask out McKinnon. Right now."

"I-I—" Remus struggled to get the words out. "I don't even _like_ McKinnon!"

"Just try it out!" Peter urged. "If she turns you down, then cool."

Remus's palms were sweating. " _That'd_ be embarrassing."

"Not more embarrassing than never having a girlfriend in all seventeen years of your _life_ ," Sirius pointed out. "Which could be very, very true for you, my friend." He looked at Peter. "And you."

Peter looked offended. Remus looked sick.

"Go Remus go!" Sirius began to chant. "Go Remus go!"

"Stop, stop, people are looking," Remus hissed, glancing around.

But Peter had joined in, and there was no stopping _that_. "Go Remus go! Go Remus go!"

"Okay, okay, I'm going!" he hissed, and shuffled over to Marlene's table.

She looked at him curiously, wearing a confused smile. "Hi?" she said.

Sirius appeared at Remus's side. "Wotcher, Marlene," he said smoothly, shooting her a knee-weakening smile. "Remus wanted to ask you a question."

"Hello." Remus said awkwardly, staring at his toes.

Sirius elbowed him hard in the side.

"Um, Marlene, are you free this weekend?" Remus asked finally, pasting on a weak smile. "To go to the Three Broomsticks with me?"

Marlene blushed, actually _blushed_. Which was slightly ruined by Sirius whispering, " _Basic_ ," into Remus's ear. Remus swatted him away.

"Um, yeah, I think so." Marlene tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "What time?"

"Sexy time," Sirius whispered to Remus.

"Five." Remus said through his forced smile.

"Uh, yeah!" she said, and blushed shyly again. (Marlene was _never_ shy.) "It's a date, then?"

"I think so." Remus said, rubbing the back of his neck. He smiled weakly. "Okay then. Bye." Then practically ran back to his table and sank into the booth.

"Remus, Remus, Remus," said Sirius, clapping him on the back. "I was not aware that you were such a lady killer."

"He got her, then?" Peter asked excitedly.

"Somehow." Sirius rolled his eyes. "You two better not be snogging or some sort over the breakfast table."

* * *

" _Slowly_ , Lily darling," James said, as Lily shot past him like a bullet.

"Catch me if you can, Potter!" she shouted, and rocketed off towards the Forbidden Forest, whooping with delight.

James smirked a little to himself. "I think I already have." But he sped after her anyway.

Lily hovered over the trees, her feet just skimming the tips. Her hair flew out behind her, and her eyes fluttered shut. Slowly, she outstretched her arms, the wind from the lake billowing up and washing her in light.

James stopped in his tracks, breath caught in his throat. She looked like an angel. He wracked his brains for something that could qualify as more beautiful than her right then— but he couldn't come up with anything.

"Look, Potter, no hands!" she shrieked suddenly, and rocked precariously on her broom.

"I see you, I see you!" he said, breaking out of his reverie and coming towards her.

And then it happened— she slipped.

She screamed, but she hadn't moved. In fact, two warm hands were holding her own. His darker, warm skin against her pale hands, like moonlight against sand.

"I've got you," he whispered to her, his breath cloudy against her shoulder and making her head spin. He was so warm, and she involuntarily pressed into him.

"You're slick," she retorted a little breathlessly, as he reluctantly let go of her.

"They call me 'Slick Salazar'." James replied teasingly, hovering a little away from her.

"Who? Sirius?" she replied, trying to get her balance back.

James laughed a little. "Yeah, that's about it."

Her stomach growled loudly. "Sorry." she said, blushing beet red. "Time to go back?"

"Sure," he replied easily, but he sounded slightly disappointed.

"Um," she said, twirling her hair nervously around her finger. "I was thinking, Potter. We could do this again?"

The joy was barely contained in the smile that enveloped his entire face. "Um, yeah! Yeah, of course we could. I mean, why not? That'd be great! We could _definitely_ —"

"We're friends, Potter." she reminded him sternly. "Just friends."

He stopped. "Oh, yeah. Friends. Of course."

And both of them returned a little somberly to the ground.

* * *

Severus was walking along the edge of the Forbidden Forest, seemingly numb to the cold. His breath was coming out in little wisps of shadow. The chill was a whispering reminder of the winter ahead.

"Severus."

He turned, face slack of emotion. "Good evening, Narcissa."

Narcissa Black was the most beautiful of her sisters, with tumbling gold hair, glittering ice-colored eyes, a face as delicately and prettily arranged as a crystal goblet. And yet, whenever Severus looked at her, he could only compare her to wild, scarlet-colored curls, a smiling, moonlit mouth and eyes like emerald fire.

Narcissa was wrapped in a green scarf and was wearing a Quidditch jacket that read _Malfoy_ on the back. His lip curled. Bloody Quidditch players. He kept walking.

"Severus, I need to speak with you."

Narcissa, no matter how beguiling and wondrous to every other boy in the school, could never turn _his_ head, and maybe that was what entranced her. To her, Severus was a lost, sad soul that needed love and attention. And she, it seemed, was ready to give it if only he would accept her.

"Tomorrow." said Severus shortly. "It's cold, and dark."

"No, please, it can't wait." she said, coming towards him and gripping his shoulder. "It's about Bella, and little Regulus."

"The first problem is that you're calling him 'little Regulus'. He'd appreciate it if you treated him like his age." Severus said coldly, glaring at the perfect, pretty hand resting on his shoulder.

"She's saying all sorts of things," Narcissa persisted. "Telling him about that Voldemort character. I don't like it. I don't want him getting wrapped up in those things."

"So what? I don't own him." Severus responded, shivering a little in the cold night air.

"You're his best friend, Severus." she said quietly. "If only you could—"

"Bella is _your_ sister." Severus interrupted icily. "Voldemort is a man vouching for Purebloods. Why don't you want the best for Regulus?"

"I—" She looked at him in desperation. "'Dromeda and Bella— they're both my sisters, and I'm the youngest. And I still do love 'Dromeda and I miss her, no matter what Mum says, and I write to her. Don't tell, Severus. I don't know, I don't want Regulus to hurt himself or anyone else."

"Cissy?" The voice belonged to another boy, in Severus's year.

"Lucius." Narcissa hissed. "Quick, Severus, leave."

Severus didn't need to be told twice. He turned on his heel and ran for the castle, Narcissa's words echoing like thunder in his head.

It seemed, according to the change of the wind, that a storm was brewing.

* * *

 **A/N: To adhere to my own selfish desires, Nymphadora's birthday is in December. Also, I have pre-decided and probably changed everyone's ages because I felt like it. This is what lack of research does, Victory. I can't believe I wrote and posted _two_ chapters in a _day_. I have _zero_ life.**

 **Please review? I'm a review whore.**


	10. Fueling the Fire

_Chapter 9_

The day had come. It was finally here.

And _Remus Lupin was no longer single!_

Or, he _was_ , but he had a _date!_

Which meant he couldn't finish his Transfiguration essay until the next morning.

Remus stared at his own reflection, his scarred, pale face staring back at him. His sandy hair was neat, his clothes were casual, his shoes were well-worn but nice. He looked very much _himself_.

"Moooooooony, darling," James cooed from the door. "You look simply _lovely_."

"Fuck you, Prongs." Remus grumbled, ripping his eyes from his reflection and stalking past his friend and out the door.

Sirius and Peter were waiting at the bottom of the stairs, Peter holding chocolate and Sirius holding flowers. "Here." they said in unison, and handed them to Remus, who blanched.

"I completely forgot!" he said, running a hand through his hair in worry. "Hell—"

"And _that's_ why you have us, mate," Sirius interrupted cheerily.

James reappeared to clap him on the shoulder. "Good luck and all that shit. But afterwards, Sirius and I have something to tell you two about." His eyes twinkled mischievously. "An idea."

"That doesn't sound good." Remus said, but it was only half-hearted. He shrugged on a jacket. "What are you going to do while I'm at the date?"

"Are you suggesting that the three of us cannot function without you?" asked Sirius, sounding offended.

"Which is utterly and completely true." Peter continued, nodding seriously.

"But we heard that Slytherins are taking drugs down at the Forbidden Forest and wanted to go check it out." James finished.

Remus narrowed his eyes at him. "Check it out to _expel_ them or to _take them yourselves?_ "

"Most probably the second option." Sirius replied apologetically.

"You know I'm okay with the alcohol, but I'm not so sure about drugs." Remus said skeptically, frowning. "Maybe I shouldn't go."

"What the hell? Of course you have to go. You can't keep a lady waiting and then _ditch_ her!" James said, aghast. "Besides, we can take care of ourselves."

Remus sighed. "Okay. Peter, I charge you with stopping these idiots from doing stupid shit."

"Aye, Captain." Peter said, saluting him.

Marlene was waiting in the Common Room, looking pretty in deep blue. She smiled and blushed when Remus handed her the flowers and chocolates.

When the two of them disappeared out the door, Remus mouthing, _Don't do drugs_ , Sirius turned back to James.

"Are we _really_ going to do drugs with the Slytherins at the Forbidden Forest?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Hell no." James responded. "I mean, maybe later. Right now, we're going to spy on Moony and McKinnon."

"Potter?" A light, feminine voice called from the Girls' Dormitory. "Are you ready?"

He turned. "For what?" he asked stupidly.

Lily frowned at him. "Our date. Friendly date, I mean."

"What? That was today?" James looked desperately at his friends, but they shrugged in answer.

"Yes, it was." Lily said sternly, fist on her hip. "We decided yesterday, remember?"

"Oh, yesterday?" James said. " _That's_ what you were saying? You looked _really_ good yesterday, Evans. I wasn't paying attention."

She glared at him.

"Alright, Lily, you're hot and I _really_ want to go on a date with you, but _Remus_ is on a date with _Marlene_ at the minute and it's _really_ important that we go and see what happens." James said in one breath, looking at Lily like she was a wrathful goddess. Which she kind of was.

Lily was quiet for a moment, humming in thought. "Alright, fine. We'll have a date anyway."

"What? I just said I was busy, Evans."

"I _mean_ , that I'm coming with you to spy on Marlene and Remus." she replied. "Marlene _is_ my best friend."

"Um," James blinked. He looked at Sirius and Peter. "Would that be alright?"

"It doesn't matter if it's alright," Lily said matter-of-factly. "I'll still come."

"It's alright." Peter said, nodding at Sirius, who shrugged. "Come forth, my red fire." he said, waving his hand over her.

Lily gave him a strange look. "Aren't you in love with Marlene?"

All three of the boys choked.

"What?" Sirius asked. "Me? In love with Marlene? HA! Not a chance. And by that I mean, no chance with me. She has no chance with me. I'm hot. I'm hot, right, guys?"

Silence.

"Yes, Sirius, you're hot." James said in a halted voice, patting his friend on the head.

Sirius was unusually and uncharacteristically red in the face. "Well, yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck and said nothing else.

* * *

So they all ended up outside the Three Broomsticks in the cold.

"Ow! Black, you're standing on my _foot!_ "

"Move your foot, then!"

"Padfoot, stop harassing my girlfriend!"

"I'm not your girlfriend, Potter!"

"Can't we all just get along, guys?" Peter hissed, kicking Sirius in the shin. "Move out of the way! I can't see!"

In the end, Sirius and Lily shoved their way to the front, while James and Peter were left sulking in the back. "This is _not_ fair." James grumbled. "And it was _my_ idea."

Lily and Sirius could see Marlene and Remus talking animatedly over the table, and Remus went to go buy drinks for the two of them. Both were pink-cheeked and smiling.  
"What do you think they're talking about?" Sirius murmured to Lily, who shrugged.

"Marlene looks happy," she said instead, and grinned to herself when she saw Sirius frown.

And the evening began to pass in a cold fashion, the four people outside beginning to yawn.

"Alright, this was a sham," Sirius announced. "I think that—" A blur of familiar green and silver robes passed in front of him, disappearing into the twilight.

"Regulus?" Sirius thought in confusion, and stared after his little brother.

"Oh, look, something is happening!" Lily said excitedly, pressing her face up against the glass. Remus had taken McKinnon's hand in his own and seriously asked her something, to which she nodded. They stood up and hugged, and Remus even kissed her hand.

"Second date!" James and Peter sang together, and James spun Lily. "Padfoot, mate—"

"Did you see Regulus?" he asked flatly, still staring into the blackness. He turned to face James, eyes uncharacteristically cold and hinting of fear. "Mate, there was this look on his face."

James stared at his friend for a second, searching his eyes. "Okay." he said, all previous excitement gone. "Okay, let's go."

"Where?" Lily demanded. "Where are we going?"

"Regulus...?" Peter trailed off, looking at his friends. "What's wrong?"

"Lily, you stay here. Peter, take care of Lily. We'll be back!" James said, and began a jog. Sirius had already sprinted after his brother.

Remus and Marlene had just appeared from the Three Broomsticks and were relatively surprised to see Lily and Peter staring into the darkness down the path.

"Hello...?" Remus asked unsurely, waving a hand in front of Lily's frozen face.

Lily grabbed his hand. "Potter and Black just ran after Black's little brother."

It seemed to dawn on Remus. "Oh, fuck," he cursed, and pulled out his wand. "Peter, you're with Marlene and Lily. Don't move!"

And he too disappeared into the shadows.

Marlene was quiet for a moment, surveying the slowly settling night.

"Well, Pettigrew, that's bloody sexist, don't you agree?" she asked thoughtfully.

"Nononono," Peter laughed breathily and nervously. "See, ladies—"

"No, Pettigrew, I don't see at all." Marlene huffed, crossing her arms. "My new boyfriend just ran off with his bloody friends and left me behind in the cold. _I_ expected him to walk me back to the castle." She shook her head. "Lily, I think there's only one thing left to do."

Lily was grinning at her friend, and Marlene brought out her wand. It glittered in the soft light of the Three Broomsticks. "You coming?"

"You bet." The two girls took off, Peter staring forlornly after them.

"Well," he said to himself, sighing. "I tried." And he too ran after them.

* * *

James and Sirius stopped in front of the eerie light of the Hog's Head. Both of them had their wands out. "I swear," Sirius snarled. "if it's Snivellus, I'll cut his balls off."

"And make him eat them?" James glanced at his friend, smirking a little.

"No, that's your job." Sirius grinned back at him, but there was still pale apprehension dancing across his dark eyes.

James pulled out his cloak and tossed it over them, opening the door.

The rough light gave way to a beautiful girl with hooded eyes and dark hair, laughing loudly at something Regulus had said. Bellatrix.

There were others there— Macnair, Crabbe, Lestrange and Goyle.

James hissed a warning before yanking Sirius out of the way. Lucius Malfoy had appeared from the doorway, looking pretentious and perfect as usual. Narcissa Black trailed after him, staring at her shoes.

"Lucius!" Bella said, dragging her nail across her teeth. " _Welcome_. And Cissy! Dear sister, I'm glad you chose the right side."

More and more students were filing in, most of them wearing silver and green robes. Sirius was tightly sprung like a coil, hands clenched onto his wand.

When the Hog's Head was unusually packed, Bellatrix tapped her wand onto the table. Silence hung over the group like a dark cloud.

"Hello, everyone." she cooed, smiling. "Thank you all for coming! Now, I'm sure you've heard—"

The door opened and gave way to a shadowy figure. Sirius sucked in his breath, and James grabbed his friend's arm.

"Sorry I'm late," Severus said quietly. "I got held up." He pulled behind him a bloodied and bruised Remus.

Sirius tensed, fists clenched. "I'll kill him," Sirius hissed to James, murder in his eyes, but James yanked him back into the safety of the cloak.

"Are you crazy?" James muttered, glaring at his friend. "Think about how outnumbered we are! If we attack, we're dead."

"If we don't move, Remus is dead," Sirius retorted.

Bellatrix was smiling wider. "Thank you, Severus." she said. "I'm so glad you chose to join us."

"I'm not joining you," Severus replied, and tossed the unconscious Remus to the floor, sitting himself on a stool. The bartender of the Hog's Head frowned down at the body. "I'm still deciding." Severus eyed Regulus, who squirmed under his gaze.

"Anyway," Bellatrix continued, as if Severus hadn't spoke. "We all know that the influence of the Dark Lord, Lord Voldemort, is spreading across all of Europe. And he's recruiting. He reached out to my mother, think, _my mother!_ And he wants young people. We're strong and powerful and fiery-tempered, and we should be honored that the Dark Lord himself wants us at all."

Murmurs of interest spread across the bar.

"Of course, none of us can _really_ join until we've graduated, but the ones who are still at Hogwarts can always _spy_ for the Dark Lord." Bellatrix's eyes were red with excitement in the low light. "So I've brought a list with me, and whoever wants to join him can sign their names. _I'll_ get it back to him."

"No." Sirius stared at James in desperation, heartbeat like lightning. "Regulus is too young."

James wore a hard, uncharacteristically serious expression. "If Voldemort, a legitimately dangerous threat is recruiting forces," James said quietly. "This could mean war."

But the list was passed around. When the parchment reached Regulus, the boy hesitated. Sirius didn't even breathe.

But Regulus finally wrote his name in his neat, careful handwriting beside all the others. Sirius felt like something inside him was drowning. "No," he whispered, and leaned against James in disbelief. "He's only fifteen. He's just a kid."

But James was watching Severus, who, after careful scrutiny of Regulus, also wrote his name down on the parchment. James glared at him in anger and pain. _This_ was Lily's childhood best friend?

Bellatrix cackled when the parchment reached her. Greedily, she read down the list of names, and then paused, frowning. She looked up. "Cissy, you didn't sign?"

Narcissa Black seemed to want to disappear. "No." Severus eyed her in interest.

Bellatrix frowned at her sister. "Why not?" she asked petulantly. "You're on 'Dromeda's side after all?"

"This isn't about sides," Narcissa said hotly, a sudden surge of anger seeming to take over her. "This is about how this is a ridiculous idea and it's _wrong_."

Bellatrix glared at her. "Fine," she said, sniffing. "We can start our practice on Lupin, here." She smiled, her teeth glittering in the dimming light. She kicked Remus's thin body.

An anger fueled by fear and fury coursed through Sirius, and he turned to James with burning eyes. "I'm right behind you," James whispered to Sirius through gritted teeth. " _Don't. Hesitate._ "

And both boys sprang from behind the cloak, deftly weaving curses throughout the bar. Shouts and screams soon echoed through the building, and the bartender hurriedly ducked out the door.

James and Sirius were back to back, standing over Remus. "We—" James shouted, firing a stunning curse towards Macnair. "—have to get Remus out of here!"

"And how the hell are we supposed to do that?" Sirius yelled back, shoving James out of the way of a curse from Lucius Malfoy.

"Cover me," James said, and pointed his wand towards Remus's nose. " _Ennervate._ "

Remus's eyes blinked blearily open. "J-James?"

"Remus, get out," James urged, helping his friend up. Remus stared at Sirius, face completely calm as he rebounded curses and held up a Protective Shield.

"What's going on?" Remus asked. "What the hell is going on?"

James opened his mouth to reply, but his response was cut off by Sirius.

" _James!_ " The scream was one of pure fear.

And James was staring into the pulsing green eyes of death, until a fiery mane of red hair tackled him to the ground. The wall behind him exploded.

Everything was hazy. James could hear screaming, and there was blood dripping from a cut on his forehead. Fire danced along the edges of his vision.

"POTTER, YOU FUCKING IDIOT!" Lily Evans was screaming, and she seemed to be crying, and James noticed she was sitting on top of him. Therefore, he dismissed it as a dream.

She punched him in the chest, and he winced. Nope, not a dream.

"Lily," he said, holding her face in his hands, in awe. She was so beautiful. "Lily, you fucking saved my life."

Someone grabbed the back of his shirt and slammed him against the wall. Lestrange.

Rodolphus glared at him, the point tip of his wand stabbing into the soft part of his throat. "I'm going to kill you, Potter." he hissed. "You just ruined everything my girlfriend has worked hard for."

"Yeah?" James said, struggling against him. "Were you aware that she's been sleeping with half the population of Hogwarts?" He grinned at his captor. "Not going to lie, she's good in bed."

Fury danced through Rodolphus's eyes. "You—"

James kicked him in his sweet spot, ripped away his wand, and snapped it in half. As Lestrange looked up, Sirius punched him in the face.

The two friends grinned at each other. "Good one," they said in unison, before James blasted a curse at Crabbe.

The Hog's Head was actual hell. Flames licked up the sides of the walls. Various people were fleeing out into the dark and snow.

Bellatrix was one of them who remained, screaming and moaning at all her good work— gone to waste. She clutched the list of signatures in her hand.

In a split second, Sirius realized he needed that list— as proof to give to Dumbledore. "Fuck," he said, and shoved James out of the way.

He leaped over a burning table and tackled his cousin to the ground. Bellatrix stared up at him in hatred and amazement. "You," she snarled, and struggled to grab her wand.

"I can break your fingers off or you can give me that list," Sirius breathed, grabbing her wand and tossing it into the flames. She screamed in fury.

"You can break off my fingers," she said, baring her teeth at him. She knocked him in the head with her own. Gritting his teeth and fighting off the pain, Sirius pulled away her fingers. As he struggled with her thumb, Bellatrix bit him on the shoulder. Hard.

"What the fuck, you crazy bitch!" he shouted, pain searing around where she bit him. He ripped the list away from her, clutching his shoulder. Bellatrix stood up, blood dripping from her mouth. She held a piece of broken glass in her hand.

Eyes black in insanity, she held it up, prepared to strike it into Sirius's back. A full body-bind curse hit her in the chest.

Marlene McKinnon wiped the sweat off her forehead. She smirked at Sirius, who stared at her. "Timing is everything, darling." she said, tossing her hair over her shoulder.

"I'll kill you, Sirius Black!" Bellatrix shouted from the floor. "One day, I'll kill you!"

"Keep dreaming, cousin dear," Sirius called back, and he and Marlene exited the Hog's Head just as it went up in flames.

* * *

 **A/N: Okay, but isn't Marlene such a badass? I love her so much. And fight scenes, as you can see, are not my forte. Sorry about that. Suffer through my pathetic fight scenes and unnecessary dialogue, really.**

 **Review? Pleeeeeease? I love reviews, seriously. I might start charging reviews for chapters.**


	11. Changing of the Winds

_Chapter 10_

Lily Evans, James Potter, Marlene McKinnon, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew were all sitting in Dumbledore's office. Remus was peacefully lying in the Hospital Wing.

Albus Dumbledore hadn't even looked at them yet. He was picking through a candy box, before he popped a lemon drop into his bearded, wise mouth.

"Ah. Hello," he said, twinkling at the five of them. They squirmed uncomfortably. All of them were depressing sights: burns and bruises and blood. None, however, compared to Remus.

"Hello," Sirius decided to say back.

Dumbledore gave him a personal twinkle. He sat down. "Would you like to tell me what happened?" he asked, folding his hands under his chin and looking expectantly at them.

James eyed his friends, who all avoided his gaze. "Um, well," he started eloquently. "Uh, yeah. So what happened was Sirius saw his brother Regulus looking suspicious, so he and I followed him to the Hog's Head, where some people were having a kind of meeting, or something. And it turned out they were all going to join Voldemort, so... we stopped them. Yeah."

"How was Remus injured so badly, and you all were not?" Dumbledore asked, not seeming surprised.

"Remus was attacked specially by Severus Snape." Sirius put in venomously.

Peter shook his head. "I hate that guy."

Dumbledore ignored that. "So... why is it your business?"

Silence.

Dumbledore twinkled again. "If someone wants to join Voldemort, who are you to interfere?"

"I mean," Lily said tentatively. "Isn't Voldemort bad?"

"Oh, yes," Dumbledore nodded. "He is a very bad man. However, it is not in our power to dictate another person's feelings or thoughts. If someone wants to join an evil man, it is their loss. Do you understand?"

They all stared guiltily at the ground. "Yes."

Sirius pulled something out of his pocket. "In case you want it, Sir." he said, and handed the list to Dumbledore. The old Headmaster took it.

"Thank you, Sirius." he said, smiling at the boy gently. "Yes, I do need this."

"By the way," Sirius said hurriedly, as if he would burst. "Regulus— didn't mean to put his name there. It's not supposed to be there. He's not part of them."

Dumbledore dipped his head. "I hope not, my dear boy." He stood up, and the five of them also stood up. "Nevertheless, the five, sorry, _six_ of you did a very brave thing, and I am glad for it. If Voldemort had gained supporters from our school, that would be a very bad thing indeed. I expect to not see many students from the meeting return to Hogwarts."

He tapped the list knowingly. "And I will know."

Then he looked at them. "For your fighting, I will have to dock fifty collective points. But I award you forty for your bravery." He twinkled again. "I think that will satisfy Professor McGonagall."

And in this unofficial way, they were dismissed.

* * *

Sirius was waiting for James in an empty corridor, when a green and silver blur passed him. He and Regulus stared at each other at the same time. Regulus broke away first, shouldering past a first year. Sirius ran after his brother.

"Regulus," he called down the hallway, attempting to weave through people like his younger brother had. "Regulus, wait!"

Regulus paid no attention to him, moving faster and faster away. Sirius grabbed his shoulder, panting. "God, slow down."

"Let go of me," Regulus said quietly, shrugging off his brother's hand and hurrying toward the Slytherin Dorms.

Sirius doggedly followed him. He didn't waste time. "Why did you do it?" he asked bluntly.

"Do what?" Regulus questioned bitterly. "Sign into it?"

"Yeah," Sirius confirmed. "Why? I thought you didn't like him. Voldemort, I mean."

Regulus whirled around to face his brother, his eyes burning. "You know what? Maybe I'd like it if you and Mum and everyone else started deciding what I want or don't want to do. Maybe if you stopped treating me like a _child_."

"I'm sorry," said Sirius, looking surprised. "I didn't think—"

"No, you never think." Regulus interrupted coldly. "You just _do_." He disappeared into the Slytherin dungeons, and Sirius stared blankly after him.

* * *

" _Okay_ Remus, this is what I wanted to talk to you about!" James was doing heavy plotting. Sirius was laughing evilly to create the dramatic effect. Peter was eating. Remus was doing that skeptic face he always did.

James paced. "We're the Marauders. We're pranksters. We're the kings of the school."

" _That_ can be argued against," Remus cut in, raising an eyebrow.

James ignored him. "But we have no lasting legacy! We have nothing for the future generations of Hogwarts to revere when we have passed!"

"What about the curse-word alphabet you and Sirius carved into McGonagall's chair?" Remus suggested drily, raising his other eyebrow.

"That," said Peter, awed, "sits beneath McGonagall's ass forevermore."

"It's a nice ass," Sirius commented thoughtfully.

"It's a nice chair," James added, equally thoughtfully.

Remus resisted the urge to hit them all in the head with the chair in question.

"Anyway," James said, shaking his head to get back to reality. "We're going to do something _big_. Something— virtually _impossible_."

"Impossible is my middle name," Peter said impressively.

Remus glanced at them with a shrewd and suspicious eye. "By _impossible_ do you mean _illegal?_ "

James blinked. An abashed silence fell over him and Sirius.

"Yes," they answered shamefully.

A toad-like expression settled over Remus's scarred countenance. "Brilliant."

"I present to you— the future Marauder's Map!" James announced, spreading a piece of blank parchment onto the table between them.

"A map?" Remus smiled a little in unexpected relief. "How the hell is a map illegal?"

"I'll tell you," Sirius said excitedly, spreading his fingers over the thin surface of the paper. "We're going to map out everything in Hogwarts. _Everything_ and _everywhere_. And by that, I mean even our secret short-cuts to Hogsmeade and whatnot. And _then_ we're going to program this to track everyone in school. Everyone! You'll know where everyone is, where they are, and where they're going! It's brilliant! It's foolproof! It's—"

Remus held up a hand. "The question is, _why?_ Why are we making this?"

"For our own benefit," James replied quickly. "We can see whoever's walking down the corner. Filch won't stand a _chance._ "

They all began looking at Remus hopefully. He glared at them. "What?"

"Will you help?" Peter asked.

"Please?" threw in Sirius.

"Pretty please?" James added desperately.

They all gave him puppy dog eyes.

Remus gritted his teeth for a last stand. _Must... resist..._

"Fine," he suddenly burst out. "For God's sake, stop looking at me like that."

"Why are you bringing religion into this? That's offensive." said Sirius calmly, who began rolling up the sacred piece of parchment and gently setting it into a box.

"Fuck you, Sirius," said Remus, rolling his eyes. "Don't you three have lives?"

"Nope," they chorused together. Then James's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "Shit! Lily! Date! _Shitshitshitshit_ —"

He bolted out the door.

Sirius frowned after his friend's retreating back. "You know, I think he keeps doing that more and more often."

"Are we getting replaced?" Peter asked quietly, a tremor in his voice.

Silence.

"Nah," Remus and Sirius confirmed, shaking their heads.

Sirius grinned reassuringly at Peter. "James, although rather stupid, knows what's important."

* * *

"Lily _fuck_ I'm so sorry—" Lily was greeted by a flurry of dark hair and glasses. Marlene frowned at the blur.

"Yes, Potter?" Marlene asked coldly.

"Lily, our date, I forgot—"

Lily shook her head, confused. "We don't have a date today."

James stopped. "What?"

"No date today, Potter." Lily repeated, raising an eyebrow. His glasses were askew on his face. She reached out and helpfully fixed them. He stared at her.

He blinked three times. "Oh. _Oh_. Sorry."

He turned rather awkwardly and shuffled back the way he came. Lily stared guiltily after him. Marlene noticed her guilty look.

"Don't you dare," Marlene warned.

"Aw, Marlene, he looks so sad—"

"Nope. You are not ditching me today."

* * *

James was shamefully making his way back to the Gryffindor Common Room, when he was stopped by a hand on his shoulder. He turned. Frank Longbottom.

"Hey," James said, offering the boy a small smile. "What's up?"

"Hi," he said, quickly smiling back before adopting a more serious look. "I heard what you did the other day."

James wracked his brains. _'Accidentally'_ _looked up Alice's skirt?_

James laughed nervously. "What?"

"I mean, you at the Hog's Head. With Black and the rest," he explained shortly, not noticing the wave of relief crashing over James's head. Also, _Black and the Rest?_ What a band name. Except, James would've preferred _Potter_ and the Rest, but—

"Oh," James said. " _Oh_. Yeah. So?"

"So those Slytherins are joining Voldemort." Frank continued. "Calling themselves... Death Eaters, am I right?"

James shrugged.

"So... Dumbledore has assigned me to form a group of our own. He's a part of it." Frank said finally, rubbing the back of his neck. "Are you in?"

James stared at the boy, taken aback. "Wait, really?"

"Yeah, really." Frank said seriously. "Dumbledore— well, he thinks it's war."

James involuntarily shivered. A cold feeling sunk into his chest. "I mean, we're kids, Frank. We're young. I don't know if we're up for fighting wars and all that shit."

"So are they," Frank countered. "I mean, if you don't want to, it's alright."

"No!" James heard himself say. "No. Can I... have some time to think?"

Frank frowned at him. "Think fast. I don't think we have much time." He turned, and disappeared into the crowd.

* * *

James was standing at the Astronomy tower, hands in his pockets, thinking. His eyes were steel in the black of the night. Everyone was asleep.

Remus had shouted himself hoarse when he heard Frank's proposition. _No, of course_ _they could not go join a fool organization made by children and a crazy old wizard. Of course they were too young. James, what the hell are you thinking? Don't you want to have a family? Wouldn't you want them to be safe?_

Sirius had been strangely silent and he had uncharacteristically gone to bed early. He had woken up James in the middle of the night and whispered hysterically, _I can't fight my own family, James, I can't._

And Peter, well, Peter was quiet too. He looked nervous and sad, eyes darting to his friends. Peter would follow them wherever they went. Their fate was inexplicably tied with his.

And James was standing at the Astronomy tower.

A whispering wind danced down from the sky and wreathed itself around his neck, sending a sudden chill through his body. Goosebumps rose up on his skin. He shivered, shoving his hands deeper into his pockets in an effort to keep warm.

And it was in this moment, as the wind rushed down from the sky and James was wracked with cold, he realized that everything, whether he wanted to or not, was beginning to change.

* * *

 **A/N: I'm actually rather proud of the way I'm progressing this story. Everything sort of slides into place rather smoothly, and it makes me happy. Anyway, guess what the theme for this chapter is? It's _James Potter_ , and how even though he's kind of an idiot, he's serious about the things he loves. It's a very good quality of James's. Okayyyyyyyyyy byeeeeeeeeeee pleaseeeeeeeeee reviewwwwwwwwwww**


	12. Red and Gold

_Chapter 11_

The Quidditch grounds were ablaze with flashing colors of green and red, shouting, and overly aggressive students.

It was Homecoming game, and of course, Gryffindor versus Slytherin. Nothing like a slightly concerning and extremely violent rivalry to kick off the year, eh?

James, the unlikely Captain of the Quidditch team was giving his team a motivational speech.

"You all—" James started impressively. "Are good. We shall kick arse!"

Everyone cheered.

"What a way with words," Sirius commented, clapping his friend on the shoulder and wiping away tears of admiration. James shrugged modestly.

A booming voice slammed into their ears. "AND NOW, PLEASE WELCOME THE SLYTHERIN TEAM!" Screaming was heard at full volume, from every angle of the field. Ravenclaw tended to support Slytherin, while Hufflepuff was usually with Gryffindor.

"I guess this is it, Padfoot." James said seriously. "Are you ready to _destroy_ Slytherin?"

"Yep." Sirius replied solemnly.

"PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR GRYFFINDOR!"

James turned towards his team. "Remember what we practiced! Remember to be confident! Also, Alicia, you look hot," he added, thumbing towards her. "Wow. Really."

And then he turned back towards the exit to meet an annoyed Lily Evans face to face.

"Oh, hello, Evans." he said pleasantly.

She glared at him, opened her mouth to say something, then abruptly shut it. "You know what? Never mind." she said, and turned on her heel and left.

James raised an eyebrow and nudged Sirius. "What the hell's up with her?" Sirius shrugged in wonderment.

Alicia attempted to squeeze between Sirius and James, but the two happily hooked elbows and strode out the tent, the girl behind them rolling her eyes.

The crowd went berserk at their appearance.

"ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT! LET'S GET THIS GAME STARTED!"

And before anyone knew it, brooms were kicked off the ground, and flashes of green and red were seen darting up and around the field.

* * *

James, Chaser Extraordinaire, had the Quaffle tucked under his arm. "Alicia!" he said, and tossed it to her, ducking as a Bludger sailed over his head.

Someone bumped into him. He almost thought it was Sirius— until he saw the green and silver robes.

"Oh. Sorry." Regulus said, staring up at James.

"No time to be polite, Black!" shouted one of the Slytherin Beaters, until Sirius whacked the Bludger towards his abdomen.

"Potter!"

James grabbed the Quaffle before it slammed into Regulus. James zipped towards the Slytherin post and tossed it into the hoop.  
"GRYFFINDOR SCORES!"

James cheered, and then narrowly dodged an attack by the previous Slytherin Beater, who had swung his bat at James's head.

"FOUL, FOUL!" Sirius yelled, and pounded a Bludger towards Regulus, who was streaking after a gold blur in the sky. It hit Alicia instead.

And so the game went— as most games go. Violent, unnecessarily aggressive, and fast. It was blur of _who exactly is winning?_

James grit his teeth as the shout was blared through the sky. "SLYTHERIN SCORES!"

James searched the clouds. "Where the hell is Anderson?" he muttered, looking for their Seeker.

Adam Anderson, a small, wiry boy with reflexes faster than a snap of the wrist, was keenly observing the area, Regulus hovering uncertainly near him.

Adam scrutinized the ground and the sky above him. And then, he dashed towards the right, madly flying through an intense battle of the Quaffle, accidentally crashing into a Slytherin Chaser and causing him to drop the ball.

James caught the released Quaffle and streaked towards the Slytherin posts.

Adam stretched out his hand, the tiny gold ball's wings fluttering at his fingertips.

James dodged another Bludger attack, the Quaffle securely between his hands. James was desperate. If there wasn't another ten points before Adam caught the Snitch, the game would end and Gryffindor would lose.

And just as Adam's hands closed around the tiny ball, James threw the ball desperately into the Slytherin goal, and the crowd erupted.

The moment was suspended in time. "GRYFFINDOR WINS!"

Music broke out all around them, red and gold streamers and banners showing up in every area of the field, red and gold glitter dripping from the sky like rain.

"GRYFFINDOR, GRYFFINDOR, GRYFFINDOR!" The students shouted, clapping and cheering. The Slytherins were arguing with Madam Hooch. _No, Potter shot in the ball after Anderson caught the Snitch!_

But James only had eyes for the beautiful redhead cheering louder than the rest, holding up a banner that read, _Go Gryffindor!_

"Potter! Potter!" she chanted along. Despite her earlier glare at him before the game, she grinned happily at him, and he grinned incredulously back.

And he really couldn't help himself. Really, he couldn't.

And before he knew it, he had shot towards her, tenderly cupped her cheek, fervently whispered, " _Lily_ ," and pressed his lips against hers.

Lily was frozen in place. James Potter was kissing her. _James Potter was kissing her_.

And then Lily melded herself against him, throwing out every bit of reason in her head, and _kissed him back._

James smiled against her lips. He could feel her quick heartbeat against his chest.

And when he pulled away, Lily's eyes were sparkling and her cheeks sported that pink blush he loved so much.

He grinned at her, sparkling in the sun, both of them liberally sprinkled with celebratory red and gold glitter. "Thanks for supporting Gryffindor, Evans," he said, smirking, and then flew down to join his teammates.

* * *

"Lily, what the _hell?_ " Marlene was shrieking.

The students were filing out of the grounds and happily back into the school to enjoy Homecoming parties in their respective Common Rooms.

Lily was still dazed. She traced her tongue along her bottom lip. "He kissed me." She was still questioning her own memory.

"I _know_ he kissed you," Marlene huffed, frowning at her friend. "I was _there_. But _why_ did you kiss him back?"

Lily stared blankly at her friend, blinking. "Because... because I wanted to." she realized. "Why not?" she asked recklessly, then stared meekly at her feet.

Marlene looked at her like she was stupid. "Lily, you _told_ him that you wanted to be just friends." She lowered her voice and looked at her friend seriously. "You know, Snape was there."

Lily stopped. "Severus?"

Marlene bit her lip. "I mean, he comes to all the Quidditch games because of his friend, Black."

Lily looked worriedly at her friend. "That doesn't mean he saw the kiss."

Marlene raised an eyebrow. " _Everyone_ saw the kiss."

Lily swore. "Dammit."

She shook her head. "Anyway, it doesn't matter what Severus thinks anymore. He and I are done. He can't influence me or my life anymore."

Marlene looked at Lily sadly. "He was your friend, Lily."

Lily thought of Severus signing onto Voldemort, and her throat closed up. "Not anymore." she choked out, and continued back to the Common Room in silence.

* * *

"THREE CHEERS FOR JAMES POTTER, WHO WON US THE GAME!" Sirius yelled, hoisting up his glass. James laughed.

The celebratory shouts of Gryffindors answered him. Too-bright lights were hung from the ceiling and flashing in different colors; everybody was drunk, dancing, or laughing, but everyone was having fun.

Lily Evans was explaining to a second year exactly why he couldn't drink the punch, when James grabbed her elbow.

He swayed on his feet. Lily raised an eyebrow. "You're drunk," she said bluntly.

"Nooo _ooope_ ," James slurred, sending her a ditzy smile. "Lily, wanna be my girlfriend?"

Lily frowned. "I'd rather talk about this when you're coherent and sober."

"But I wanna talk about it _now_ ," James insisted, wobbling. "'Cuz you're pretty and nice and smart and—"

"Thank you." Lily said, unable to keep a small smile off her face. "But wait till you're sober." She turned to disappear into the crowd of people, but James was still holding onto her arm.

" _Lily_ why are you mad at me?" James whined. "You were mad at me before the Quidditch game. But I won! I won the game!"

"James, I know you won the game, " Lily replied patiently.

"Then why were you madddd?" James complained. He sat on the ground in despair.

Sirius appeared from behind him. "Is he drunk?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes." Lily replied affirmatively. She looked at James and tucked her hair behind her ear. "I got a little jealous when you called Alicia hot." she admitted.

"But she is hot," James said in confusion.

"Yeah, well," Lily threw up her hands. "I mean, I don't know. You can call whoever you want hot. Why are we having this conversation? You're drunk and on the floor, in the middle of a party, while your best mate watches us have a relationship talk."

Sirius waved.

"But we kissed," James said. "Right, Sirius?" Sirius nodded.

"I know," Lily said, cheeks heating up. "I don't know, James, it was the heat of the moment. Anyway, you kiss plenty of girls. I'm sorry, I have to go find Marlene." she lied, and attempted to merge back into the party. James's leg was blocking her path. She was about to pick her way over it when he asked:

"Did you kiss me because you like me or because I won the game?" James gazed at her innocently and a little sadly, looking up at her with big eyes.

She chewed worriedly on her lip, mind racing a million miles a minute. Shrugging apologetically, she turned and ran back into the crowd like her life depended on it.

And honestly? It did. Who knew liking James Potter was her biggest fear?

* * *

Severus Snape was alone in the Slytherin Common Room. He felt numb inside.

He stared blankly at a wall, as if his fingers were frozen.

"Severus," said a voice. He didn't move.

Narcissa. She was wearing a beautiful navy-colored nightgown. Her hair tumbled down her back and around her shoulders. She looked enchanting; but Severus did not even glance at her.

She sat, rather floated, down next to him. "Are you alright?" she asked quietly, carefully.  
"I'm fine." Severus replied flatly. His face was as hard as stone.

Narcissa was quiet for a moment, nervously twisting her fingers in her lap. "You don't seem fine." she said finally. "Tell me what's wrong."

Anger flared up. "Narcissa, leave me alone." he said, a crack of emotion slipping through his voice.

"No, I won't." Narcissa said, adopting that hard, stubborn look worn on both her sisters. "I'm your only friend, Severus. Maybe it'd do you good not to push me away."

Severus's hands shook with anger for a moment; then he stopped, though his shoulders trembled. "You don't understand." he said, shuddering. He clenched his hands into fists. "Fine. I'm not fine. I'll never be fine. But that's fine because _her_. _Her her her._ Not fine. Not fine not fine not fine—"

He stood up and left, Narcissa gazing sadly after him.

* * *

It was the next day, a crisp autumn afternoon. Everything was red and gold, as was Lily Evans, talking animatedly with her friend Alice and enjoying the weather.

Someone leapt down from the tree they were passing under. Lily screamed.

James straightened his cloak, grinning. "Boo," he said, smirking at her. "Wotcher, Evans."

Lily found herself eyeing his mouth. Alarms went off in her head. _Stupid Lily_ , she scolded, and attempted to will away the pink blush painted across her face.

"Aren't you hungover?" she asked, choosing to frown at him. Alice smirked, crossing her arms. _Oh, this was going to be good._

"Nothing a good Pepper-Up potion can't fix," he responded breezily. "Anyway, my Lily-flower, who wears cherry-flavored chapstick—" He winked at her, and Lily's entire face turned red. "—would you like to go on another, ahem, _friendly_ date this weekend?"

Lily swallowed. He was still smirking.

"I suppose." she replied stiffly.

Another body dropped down from the tree. Lily screamed again.

"Everyone knows it's not a friendly relationship anymore," Sirius remarked.

Lily huffed, crossing her arms. "I'll have you know it's quite friendly."

"Yeah," Sirius said sarcastically, nodding at his best mate. "You share everything, even saliva."

Alice snorted, and Lily glared at her traitor of a friend.

Sirius noticed Alice and smiled charmingly. "Oh, hello, Alice. You _do_ look nice today."

Frank appeared behind his girlfriend, raising an eyebrow. "Sorry, what, Sirius?"

Sirius didn't lose his grin. "I said, 'Oh, hello, Alice. You _do_ look _mice_ today.'"

Lily shook her head. "I will never understand you."

"He means she looks like a rat," James translated. Sirius nodded. Frank frowned.

Peter came strolling down the path, not surprisingly, eating something.

"Talk of the devil and he shall appear," Sirius commented, mildly surprised.

" _What?_ " Lily said, now completely confused.

Marlene also appeared alongside Remus; animatedly chatting with him. Her cheeks were flushed from the cold, but she was smiling widely. Remus had recovered extremely well from his ordeal, and, being the undeniably wonderful and selfless boy that he was, refrained from murdering Severus.

It wasn't so easy restraining Sirius, though.

"What's going on?" Marlene said, leaving Remus's side and hooking her elbow through Lily's. "A family meeting?"

"Evans and James are going on a date this weekend," Sirius informed her. He brightened suddenly. "Hey, we should all group date!"

Everyone made a face.

"Come on, it'll be fun!" Sirius said happily. "Look, it's paired off perfectly: James and Evans, Moony and McKinnon, Frank and Alice, and me and Peter!"

Peter blanched.

Sirius elbowed him. "You know you want me."

"I guess." Alice said, looking to Frank. "What do you think?"

Frank looked pensive for a moment, then up to the others. "And— we can talk about...?" He looked meaningfully at James. James fidgeted uncomfortably.

"What?" Marlene demanded. "Talk about what?"

" _That's_ for the weekend, McKinnon dear," Sirius said, breaking the silence and slinging an arm around Marlene's shoulders. "Peter, darling, accompany me to class."

Peter rolled his eyes. "See you," he said apologetically to the others, and jogged after Sirius.

One by one, everyone left, and then it was just James and Lily.

James rubbed the back of his neck. "Are you in?"

Lily shivered in the chill autumn air. "I suppose. I'm not busy this weekend, although there _is_ a Charms test on Monday." She frowned worriedly, and chewed nervously on her bottom lip.

James allowed himself a tiny, tiny smile. There were sides of Lily that he loved so much that he could barely breathe. There were glimpses of her in different shades, but they were all Lily. He liked everything about her. She was perfect. Utterly perfect.

Lily noticed him smiling and frowned self-consciously. She tucked her hair behind her ear. "What?" she demanded, cheeks coloring. "There _is_ a Charms test."

"Lily Evans," he said, smiling wider. He leaned against a tree, fitting right in with the red and gold leaves and warm brown bark. "We'll go on Saturday, and we can study together in the library."

She looked at him skeptically. "You. Study."

He laughed. "Anything for you, love."

The air itself seemed to change. The autumn leaves fell gently to the ground, but the chill was replaced by a strange warmth in Lily's chest.

Suddenly they were too close together. Her breath was a wispy cloud curling up against his cheek.

"It _is_ a friendly date, right?" she whispered, and looked up at him imploringly.

His vision was clouded over by _her, her,_ and _her._ "Um, whatever you want."

"What do you want?" she asked. Her eyes. She had the most beautiful eyes. He had never worshipped them enough. Green, and fringed with dark lashes. Beautiful. She was beautiful.

Both of them knew his answer, but James leaned his forehead against hers. It was cool, and comforting.

He sighed. "I want whatever makes you happy, Lily." he said quietly. "Okay?"

He smelled like pine and a warm hearth. She breathed in. She rested her cheek against his chest, and he wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin on her head.

"Okay."

* * *

 **A/N: THEY KISSED! *dances wildly* Is it too early? Oh God, I hope it's not too early. That would suck. Dammit, it probably _is_ too early. **

**Also, you can probably tell I am _horrible_ at writing about Quidditch. That Quidditch segment up there makes me want to throw up, it's so ugly. I'M SORRY!**

 **Also, drunk James is the cutest.**

 **Review?**


	13. Contracts and Love Songs

_Chapter 12_

A terribly awkward silence was hanging over the table when Sirius and James walked into the Three Broomsticks, half an hour late. Remus gave them the evil eye.

"You showed up," Lily commented icily.

"We make time for you, Evans dear," Sirius replied delicately. "Now, where's the food at?"

Marlene frowned. "All of us already ordered." She herself was currently spearing a piece of chicken.

"Ah," Sirius said, and stole it, tossing it into his mouth.

"Black!"

James sat down opposite Lily. He smiled at her. She frowned.

"Hey, Rosie!" Sirius flagged down Madam Rosmerta, who appeared blushing and pink. She had only worked at the Three Broomsticks for a year; graduating from Hogwarts only a year before. She and Sirius had their fair shares of snogs in hidden alcoves, and _nobody_ got over Sirius Black.

Thanks to Sirius's massive amounts of flirting, they got a discount.

When their food finally arrived, James clapped Remus on the shoulder. "So... what's up? Why so gloomy?"

Frank cleared his throat. "Um, well. It's a serious topic we're talking about today."

"Goddamn, Longbottom, always ruining the mood." Sirius said jovially. "We're friends eating a friendly dinner together. Isn't that splendid?"

"Well, yes." Frank conceded. "But—"

"We're not friends." Marlene said bluntly, frowning at Sirius.

Sirius chuckled and nudged James. "She's still mad about the time we caught her in the bath."

Marlene turned red. Lily's jaw dropped.

" _Anyway_ ," Alice cut in hurriedly, before Marlene could punch Sirius in the face. Remus patted his girlfriend's hand reassuringly, while frowning sternly at his best mate.

"A couple students are ditching school to sign up in this guy Voldemort's rebel group. Dumbledore has realized that to fight against Voldemort, we'd need some people on our side. _So_ he asked us." Alice finished, and glanced at her boyfriend, who smiled at her encouragingly.

Marlene blinked. "Wait, to fight? I'm confused. Students can't fight, we're not allowed to."

"Only if you want to." Frank replied. "There are plenty of ways to help the Order."

"The Order?" Remus repeated, glancing at Sirius and James, who had gone uncharacteristically quiet.

Frank looked slightly embarrassed. He rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah. That's what Dumbledore's calling it. The Order of the Phoenix."

A reverent, strange sort of hush fell over the group. It was a bittersweet, electrifying feeling; like the day after Christmas. It was danger, but it was exciting. They all looked at each other.

Lily was the first to think logically. "Wait, wait, wait. We're all a bunch of kids." She laughed a little nervously. "We haven't even graduated yet. How can _we_ begin this crazy organization? And why would Dumbledore want us to join?"

"Um, it's kind of a funny story." Frank said, reddening slightly. "I— well, I don't know what I'm going to do after Hogwarts. I've never really thought about it before. And you know the career plan classes we had to take? It was my private session with Dumbledore, and I confessed that I didn't know who I was, or what I was going to be. And he told me he understood, but that I was very good at Defense Against the Dark Arts. He said I could look into that. And _then_ he told me about the Order. It's not a career, let me tell you. You don't get paid. It's a secret force, even the Ministry doesn't know about it. It's been gaining rank since Voldemort came to power. And it's not a bunch of kids, there are a ton of adults along with Dumbledore. He told me that there was always the Order, and that he could take care of any graduate who wanted to join. And I thought I'd try recruiting, as my first task."

"So you're already signed in?" Remus questioned, raising an eyebrow. "There's no backing out of it?"

Frank laughed. "No, no. This isn't Voldemort. If you want to quit, you quit. The only catch is that you get any memories of the Order wiped. Their secrets are pretty much, well, _top-secret_."

"But now we know that it exists." Peter said curiously. "Are you going to wipe our memories?"

Frank hesitated. "If we have to."

Alice threaded her arm through his. "Frank seemed to think that you six wouldn't back down. He was almost sure that you'd sign in."

"That's not fair," Sirius said, frowning at them. His carefree attitude had slipped out the door. His expression was sullen and slightly frightened. "You don't know anything for sure. You don't know who we are."

James looked strangely solemn. "I mean, _Frank_." he said, giving a breathy, nervous sort of laugh. "We're just kids, like Evans said. We— I mean, you can't expect us to fight a war."

"You don't have to," Frank insisted. "If you don't want to fight, don't fight. Fine. Maybe support us economically, or give us housing if we need it."  
"And you're in?" Marlene suddenly asked Alice, who burrowed closer to her boyfriend.

"I am," Alice replied. "Of course I am."

"What do you mean, 'of course'?" Lily asked, who, like Sirius, looked very angry at hearing this proposal.

Alice bristled slightly at Lily's tone. "I mean, _of course_. This is an offer to preserve the world I love, to give the best life I could offer to my children, to the next generation. An offer to _do something about my own future_ , and honestly, I didn't think twice when Frank asked me."

A thoughtful silence fell over them.

"Being part of the Order would put my future family at risk." Lily said quietly. "All of us could die. Or my child's mother could die. He or she would have to grow up in a world without his or her mother."

Alice looked at Lily very seriously. A sort of understanding passed between them. "Would you die for your child?"

Lily chewed her lip. She didn't like thinking about her future life before she had grown up. _But_ —

She swallowed. "Yes. Yes, of course I would. I mean, I don't know." She wrung her hands. "The point is, it's dangerous. Normal life would be a dream."

"Of course it's dangerous!" Alice burst out. She turned to Sirius. "Isn't it you who always says, 'what's life without a little danger'?"

Sirius's eyes were sad. A tight silence fell over the group.

"My brother is part of Voldemort's student recruits." he said finally, sighing. He suddenly looked incredibly tired. "He's my family. And I love him, despite whatever you all think of him. He's my baby brother. I— I look after him, not fight against him. Do you understand?"

James touched his shoulder. "Padfoot, you don't have to." He turned to Frank fiercely. "In fact, if you're going to force us to do this, I'll cut off your penis."

Frank looked at him like he was extremely stupid. "James, I'm not forcing anyone, you idiot."

But Sirius had grinned a little at James's threat. He looked at James. "You know, Prongs," he said, sighing a little in resignation. "When do we ever think about what we're doing before we do it?"

Peter smiled. "We're doers, not thinkers. We're _Marauders_."

"And future Longbottom Missus is _right_ ," Sirius sighed again. "I _do_ always say life's nothing without danger."

"Yeah," James looked at his friend sideways. "But you're talking about school. About McGonagall, or McKinnon or something." Marlene glared at him.

"No, I'm not." Sirius replied, looking surprised at himself. "I'm talking about danger. All-around danger. Prongsie, we were _born_ for danger."

They were looking at each other in that way they did when they were thinking the same, stupid thing.

Sirius turned to look at Frank, sighing again. "Damn you, Longbottom. Damn you to hell." He grinned. "I guess I'll join."

James sighed. "Now I don't have a choice. What the hell? I'll join too."

Lily stared at the two of them. Frank was grinning like an idiot. Alice smiled secretly and snuggled closer to her boyfriend.

"Who'll bring you food but me?" Peter asked jovially. "I'll have to sign up." His grin fell. "But, Frank, I'll warn you: I'm not a fighter. Like, at all. I suck at Defense."

"He also sucks at Potions," Sirius added, shoveling food into his mouth. James was signing a contract Frank had handed him, hands shaking with excitement.

"And Charms," James added as well, handing the parchment to Sirius.

Peter scowled. "I'm good at Herbology."

"He's average." Remus corrected quietly. He had crossed his arms and was staring shrewdly at Frank.

Everyone looked expectantly at him.

"Well, we're waiting on you, Moony dear," Sirius sang, looping through the cursive in his signature.

Remus was silent for a moment.

"Do you accept all people?" he asked finally. "Anyone? Even if they may seem evil, if they aren't the best. Do you accept people who are different?"

Frank looked confused, but answered: "...Yes. I mean, as long as they stay loyal to the cause."

"And what is this cause, exactly?" Marlene cut in. "To battle evil? To protect the Ministry at all costs?" She spoke sarcastically. "I'm not joining some immature superhero squad."

"It's to protect things that are _good_." Frank said, frowning. "Right now, that means battling Voldemort. That means keeping him away from things that make us happy. To keep him from murdering people. To make sure our families stay alive."

Flashes of his friends and family flashed through Remus's mind. He saw James and Sirius, telling him he was going to be alright in the Shrieking Shack. People who loved him, despite who he was. He couldn't even _imagine_ them dying. His chest tightened.

Frank was looking at Lily and Marlene. Lily squirmed uncomfortably.

"Well?" he asked expectantly. "Are you in?"

Silence.

"I— I have to think about it." Lily said evasively. She looked down at the table. Marlene nodded in agreement.

"But I'll join." Remus said suddenly. "Hand me that contract, Prongs."

James grinned widely, sliding the parchment across the table. He smirked at Frank. "The Marauders have spoken."

* * *

The rest of the evening had passed wonderfully. Everyone was talking and laughing, and no one spoke about the Order or Voldemort or anything else depressing.

When it was finally over, James offered to accompany Lily back to the castle. She had politely, albeit stiffly, refused, but he tagged behind her anyway. The rest of them had all faded into a red-and-gold colored cloud in front of them. Lily had her eyes fixed on the ground.

"Lily-flower," James said, slinging an arm around her shoulders. "How beautiful the moon is tonight."

"Huh."

He poked her. She scowled at him. "Why are you so upset?"

She tried to hold back her words. Really, she did.

But it exploded out of her. "Because— because you just threw your life away!"

He looked at her, confused. He was wearing a teasing smirk. "No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did!" she ranted. "You did! You threw away any chance of a future you could have. You could die today, tomorrow, the day after—"

"Relax, Evans." James said, rolling his eyes. "Nobody knows that I signed onto the Order. Nobody even knows what it is. And maybe I've thrown away my future, though I'm sure I haven't, but in throwing away _my_ future, I have maybe created someone else's through my sacrifices." He grinned into the distance. "Isn't that grand?"

Lily looked at him in wonderment. There were so many colors of James Potter. This one, in particular, was strange and lovely.

"I—" she stuttered, tearing her eyes away from him. Wisps of cold air teased gently at his black hair, and it was mesmerizing. "I don't know."

"Cheer up, Evans." James said. His voice was still light. "Maybe after I'm dead, some guy will pluck up the courage to ask you out."

"Don't say that," she said automatically. "No, never say that."

He laughed. "So you _do_ like the attention."

She glared at him. " _No_ , I meant don't say you'll _die_." In a fit of anger, she hurried off into the darkness alone. She didn't want to spend another minute with James Potter.

In a minute, he had jogged up to her again. "Lily, Lily, I'm sorry, Lily."

She didn't reply, just huffed angrily and sped up.

"Come on, Evans, what can I do to cheer you up?" he asked, hurrying after her.

"Probably leave." she responded shortly.

"I'm going to start singing."

"Please don't—"

But James had begun to sing, loudly and passionately. " _Chingaari koi bharke!_ "

Lily had shut up and stared at him. He didn't seem to notice. " _Saawan jo agan lagaaye, use kaun bazaaye?_ " James spun Lily.

" _Saawan jo agan lagaaye, use kaun buzaaye? Patazad jo baag ujaade, wo baag bahaar khilaaye!_ "

James was beautiful. He wasn't a bad singer, either; but Lily was too wrapped up in the fact that James seemed to be singing her a _Bollywood_ song that she could barely think.

" _Jo baag bahaar mein ujade, use kaun khilaaye?_ " He spun her again.

He had stopped singing and was smiling very sweetly at her. "There, you're smiling again. You have the prettiest smile, Lily Evans."

"What song is that?" she asked, and was unable to tear her eyes from his face.

"Oh, that?" James was shamelessly holding her hand and rubbing his thumb across her palm. "It's _Chingaari Koi Bharke_."

"What does it mean?" she wondered.

" _'If a spark flares up, then the rains might extinguish it, but if the rains light a fire, who can put it out? If the autumn lays waste to a garden, the spring will bring that garden into flower. But if that garden is destroyed in the springtime, who can make it bloom?'_ " James answered quietly. He shot her another small smile.

"That's beautiful." Lily said. Her breath was a white cloud in front of her. "Sing more."

He laughed a little. " _Hum se mat poochho kaise, mandir tootaa sapanon kaa/Logon kee baat naheen hai, ye kissaa hain apanon kaa/Koee dushman thhens lagaaye, to meet jiyaa bahalaaye/Manameet jo ghaanw lagaaye, use kaun mitaye?_ "

"What does that mean?" Lily asked, almost hungrily. The words were so strange and beautiful.

" _'Do not ask me how the temple of dreams shattered, it is not a matter for strangers, it is what my own loved ones have done to me. If a foe wounds me, a friend will heal. When a friend inflicts a wound, who will heal me?'_ "

"A song of loneliness and betrayal," Lily murmured. "That is the prettiest thing I've ever heard."

"Thanks, Evans." he replied. He was staring off into the distance, still holding her hand. "It reminds me of my family."

"In India?" she asked, looking up at him and searching his face, but his expression was unreadable.

"No," He laughed a little. "They live in England. My mum loves that movie."

"Oh." she said, nodding. "Do you miss them?"

"Of course I miss them." James snorted. "Don't you miss your family?"

"Yes." Lily sighed. "I do. My sister Petunia hates me for coming to Hogwarts and becoming a witch."

"Why?" James asked. "Being a witch is wonderful."

"Yes, but she doesn't see it. My parents are supportive and loving, but in the end, they don't really understand. Sometimes I feel very—"

"Alone." James finished, nodding. "Yeah."

He smiled gently at her. "You should never be ashamed of being different, Evans." She shrugged noncommittally.

He looked up at the sky. "I think all of us feel different. Everyone feels different in their own way, and groups everyone else as similar. I think we all overlook everyone else's problems, because we don't know them. You know? Everyone is different."

"In a world where everyone is trying to be unique, being unique is the most ordinary thing in the world." Lily said quietly. "Yes. I understand."

"Good talk, darling." James said finally. "Can we snog now?"

She hit him in the arm. "No."

"OW! ' _Manameet jo ghaanw lagaaye, use kaun mitaye?'_ "

"What?"

" _'When a friend inflicts a wound, who will heal me?'_ Song lyric."

"How do you say 'fuck you' in Hindi?"

" _Main tumse pyar kartha hoon_."

"Then, _main tumse pyar kartha hoon_."

They had reached the rest of the group. Sirius looked at them. He pouted. "James only says that to _me_."

Lily frowned. "What does it mean?"

Sirius smirked at his friend, who quickly and desperately shook his head. "It means 'I love you'."

James bolted, Lily screaming obscenities at him.

"Young love," Remus said sarcastically. "How sweet."

* * *

 **A/N: I'm so sorry for uploading so late! I mean, I don't have a particular posting schedule, but I try to post within three days. My WiFi literally broke, so I couldn't upload any chapters :( And yeah, Hindi! I _am_ Indian, but I don't speak Hindi, so I tried! And this song is literally from the 70's, and was extremely popular. I do my research, bitches.**


	14. A Deal Is Set

_Chapter 13_

"Three, two, one!" Sirius whispered loudly, and the upstairs Boys Lavatory exploded.

The Marauders cheered and slapped high-fives. Even Remus was grinning.

"Alright, alright, let's get the fuck out of here," James said, who had gotten control of his laughter first. He made to sprint down the hallway.

"No, mate, wait till Snape gets his drenched ass out," Sirius reminded, grabbing his friend's shirt.

"Pray that McGonagall doesn't find us," James muttered through clenched teeth.

"McGonagall? More like Filch," Remus corrected. "His cat has a weird fascination with this hallway."

"Stupid cat," Sirius muttered. "That thing is immortal."

"Yeah," Peter put in. "We tried drowning it in a toilet."

They huddled in an alcove, peeking out from behind a wall.

Snape finally appeared, sputtering and soaked with toilet water. Several other boys also came dripping into the hallway, looking absolutely mortified and afraid someone would see them.

"That's cute," Sirius sniggered, digging a camera out of his pocket and snapping an inconspicuous picture of Severus. "Evans will love that."

"Don't you dare show it to her," James warned, his eyes still on Snape, who looked like he was about to murder someone. Probably them.

"Buggershitdamnhell," Remus hissed, and grabbed their shirts, flinging them farther into the wall.

McGonagall had come storming up the stairs, shouting and glaring at the boys. They cowered under her fiery presence. Severus alone didn't seem to be listening. He was staring around like he could see through walls.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU WAS IT?" McGonagall yelled.

Everyone proclaimed their innocence.

"It was Potter," Snape suddenly spat. "I know it. He's here somewhere."

"Oh fuck," James said, blinking.

"Potter?" McGonagall repeated, and then adopted the same evil smile. "Oh. Yes."

"Do you think they can _smell_ me?" James asked, shoving his shirt under Peter's nose.

"Potter and Black, probably." McGonagall said. She was creeping towards them. "Yes."

"She's a wolverine," Sirius said in awe.

"Shouldn't we run?" Remus pointed out, swallowing a little in fear.

"Nah. I have the Cloak here somewhere," James said, rummaging around in his bag.

"We're going to die," Peter said.

"Perhaps even Lupin and Pettigrew," Snape added, creeping along after McGonagall like a faithful, overgrown bat.

"Yes, yes." McGonagall was concentrating hard. She turned the corner and saw them huddled against the wall. She glared at them.

"I told you we should've ran." Remus whispered. His voice was practically inaudible.

Even though the boys stood heads and shoulders above the Professor, they cowered as she came near. "Detention," McGonagall said through her nose, breathing hard. "For a _month_."

"But I already _have_ a detention scheduled tomorrow," Sirius pouted.

"I don't care." McGonagall said, looking as if she was going to explode like the toilets. "Potter, you, Head Boy, of all the _stupid_ —"

Severus had sidled up next to her. He grinned nastily at them, though the effect was slightly ruined by him dripping toilet water all over the floor.

"What's going on here?" Lucius Malfoy showed up. His stupid blond hair was in a ponytail. He was, apparently, growing it out for Narcissa. ( _You know, most guys grow a beard_ , Sirius had said when he found out.)

"These hooligans have just blown up the Boys Toilet!" McGonagall exploded.

"Did she just call us hooligans?" Peter repeated, in slight shock and disgust.

Lucius looked severely disappointed in them. "Shall I escort them to Professor Dumbledore to be expelled?"

The Marauders all gasped in indignation.

McGonagall was still breathing through her nose. "No, no, thank you. Please take them back to their dormitories."

"Very well. Come," Lucius said pompously, and turned on his heel. Sirius turned his stupid hair a revolting shade of pink, once they were out of McGonagall's sight.

When they reached the Common Room, they sat all sat down on the couch.

James was the first to speak. "Wait. I'm Head Boy?"

"Yeah, I know," Peter said incredulously. "Who the fuck would allow that?"

"Dumbledore is a crazy old man." Remus said solemnly.

Sirius looked slightly abashed. "Prongs, I have something to admit to you." he began dramatically. "I sold your Head Boy badge."

" _What?_ " James shouted.

"When you told me to open your school letter on the Hogwarts Express, I accidentally dropped the badge into my bag. When I discovered it, I sold it." He held open his shirt. "Strike true, Prongsie. Strike me dead."  
" _Why_ , though?" James said, ignoring Sirius's exposed chest. Peter mimed gagging in the background.

Sirius looked at him indignantly. "It was solid gold, mate!"

"True." James conceded. He shook his head. "But still! _Lily's_ Head Girl, idiot." He smacked Sirius in the back of his head.

Sirius doubled over. "So?"

" _So_ we'd share a Common Room!" James hissed. " _Obviously_."

"I mean," Sirius said, sitting up. "I bought that vodka we drank on the first day with it."

 _That_ made everything better. James's full expression changed.

"Good use of money," he said appreciatively. "At least it went to a good place."

"Thanks."

"What's going on here?" Lily had appeared. An eyebrow flicked up. Sirius was on the ground with his shirt buttons half-undone, while the other three boys crowded around him.

"We're having a foursome," James replied cheerily. "Want to join?"

Remus punched him in the stomach. He fell on top of Sirius.

He twisted his grimace into a sort of fake smile. "No, we aren't, Lily. We're discussing the fact that James hadn't known he was Head Boy all year."

"Oh." Lily said, flushing. "I knew."

"You _did?_ " James said in outrage, standing. "How could you? Traitor."

"I just knew you wouldn't be a very good Head Boy," Lily defended, crossing her arms over her chest. "Todd is much better. I asked him to fill in for you."

"Todd _Winston?_ " James spat. "He's a tosser."

" _That's_ hypocritical," Remus muttered to Peter under his breath.

Lily glared at him. "He is _not_ a tosser. He's a responsible young man, and he _never_ forgets his duties or is _ever_ late to the patrols."

"Yeah, well," James countered pathetically. "I mean, how could you allow a man with such roving hands near you? Especially alone in the Common Room?"

Lily had her hands on her hips. "Last time I checked, you weren't my _father_ , James Potter. And Todd Winston is the perfect gentleman."

"Not true!" Sirius defended his best mate. "He grabbed Alice's ass once."

Lily's face was turning purple. "This doesn't concern you, Black!"

"I'm going on patrols with you from now on." James announced. "We're removing Winston from the picture."

"Absolutely not!"

"No, you have no say in this, Evans." James continued, as if she hadn't spoke. "I have been ignoring my duties all year, no fault of mine, of course, and now I will resume them as if I had been doing them all along." He sniffed pompously. "When is the first patrol?"

But Lily had stomped away in a fiery temper.

James's expression dampened. "Where's she going?"

"Probably to vent to Todd Winston," Sirius said sympathetically, and James punched him in the shoulder.

* * *

The library was warm and bright, despite the dreary weather outside.

Lily Evans was snuggled into an armchair, studying tirelessly for her Charms test the next day. Marlene and Remus were somewhere else, doing cute couple things.

Lily sighed. There weren't many girls in the school who didn't want to be her; the apple of James Potter's eye. But they didn't understand. Because James was so fixated on her, every boy she came in a five meter radius of would fearfully shuffle away. They didn't want to take whatever 'his property' was. And Lily knew that as a fact. Once, when a sweet boy from her Transfiguration class asked her out, James and Sirius beat him up in Hogsmeade. He was in the Hospital Wing for a week. Lily had felt horrible. And obviously, couldn't go on a date with him.

And it kind of sucked, not have dated any boys. She couldn't even _befriend_ guys, because they were so scared James would get jealous. It was lonely and depressing, so here she was, on a rainy Sunday afternoon, alone in the library studying for a Charms test. It couldn't get any more pathetic, could it?

James dropped into the seat next to her. Every part of her glared at him. Apparently it _could_ get more pathetic.

"Why, hello there!" James said brightly. "Didn't expect to see you here, Evans."

Her glare sharpened.

"I'm studying for my Charms test tomorrow." He peeked over at her parchment. "Oh, what a coincidence! You're studying for it too!"

Lily picked up her things and moved over four chairs.

"Yeah, you're right, the light's better over there," James said happily, moving his stuff closer to her.

"Potter." she said through gritted teeth. "Leave. Me. Alone."

He was humming happily. "Loneliness is not good for the soul, Lily-flower. We had a talk about it yesterday."

She was trying to forget about him singing Hindi songs to her. Sometimes, he was incredibly sweet, and other times he was the biggest asshole she had ever met.

"Can I just have some space?" she burst out. "For like two days?"

"This is space," he said, pointing to the gap between them. "No space is like, sharing an armchair or something. Which I would not be mad about."

"I'm going to ask out Todd Winston." Lily announced suddenly. She was slightly surprised. When had she ever liked Todd Winston? Never.

The smile on his face disappeared. "What the hell? Why?"

"Because he's cute. And he's nice. And I like him." Lily lied passionately.

"No, you don't," James scoffed. "When have you liked Todd Winston? He doesn't deserve you."

"One day," Lily said furiously. "I'm going to get a restraining order against you."

"Playing hard to get unfortunately _does_ suit you," James said sarcastically. "Maybe why I've been chasing after you for more than half my life."

"Look, Potter," Lily said, attempting to regain control of her temper. "I'm going to ask out a couple guys. We're going to go on dates. And you're _not_ going to interfere. Okay?"

"No, not okay!" James hissed. "Which boys? Which guys? Who? When?"

"I have compromised my own happiness when I decided not to murder you in your sleep," Lily told him, glaring. "And I swear I will, if you don't let me do this."

"I'd come back to haunt you," James said flippantly, waving it away before he countered her first claim. "And compromised your happiness? I've compromised my own happiness when I decided I wanted you out of all the other girls at Hogwarts! Chasing after you has been hell!"

"Then _stop!_ " Lily hissed back. "Why can't we just be friends, Potter? Or better, you just leave me alone?"

" _You kissed me!_ " he whispered back angrily. "Or did you forget about that?"

"For the record, _you_ kissed _me_ first!"

"I might just do it again to shut you up!"

They glared at each other.

Simmering slightly, James leaned back. "Okay. You're going to ask out a few guys and go on a couple dates without me or Sirius maiming them in any way. Correct?"

Lily managed a tight nod.

"Fine." he said through gritted teeth, because it was _clearly_ not fine. Lily was _his_ , dammit. "In exchange, you're going to get rid of Winston and let me actually fulfill my Head Boy duties."

"Like patrols?" she asked, frowning.

"Like patrols. Like docking points. Like actually _acting_ like a Head Boy."

Lily considered. Then took a deep breath. "Fine. That's fair."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Fine."

She hit him in the arm. "Honestly, Potter, stop acting like such a child."

Madam Pince stood in front of them, looking livid. "I have _never_ seen such behavior in the library!"

"Not even in the high class porn novels in the adult section?" James asked innocently.

Madam Pince turned purple, while Lily turned a very attractive shade of puce.

"Alright, alright, detention, I got it." James held up his hands in surrender, standing up and shoving his hands in his pockets, swaggering out of the library. The girls stared dreamily after him.

"That boy," Madam Pince said in wonderment.

"That boy." Lily agreed.

* * *

 **A/N: This book is going to be looooong. Sorry if all these chapters suck, I don't have an editor haha. And I have to get more Sirius/Marlene action in here, somehow bring Remus and small Tonks together, make Peter meet Voldy and it's going to be CRAZY BOI CRAZY**

 **Also I love you all. You're all cooler than me. Please review? For me? For ME?**

 **creds to tierfal for "buggershitdamnhell". 'Tis a beautiful word.**


	15. Birthday Wishes

_Chapter 14_

"Move bitch, get out the way, get out the way," Sirius sang, shoving past people in the hallway, Peter muttering apologies in his wake.

"It's going to be a good day, Pettigrew," Sirius commented cheerily. "I can tell."

They were going to meet James and Remus in the courtyard. They were beginning their finest and most important project of their lives— the Marauder's Map.

The leaves were fully gold and red and were beginning to shed heavily. James and Remus were sitting at the cracked water fountain surrounded by glittering leaves.

"Prongs, darling, it has been too long," Sirius said dramatically, throwing himself onto James's lap.

"Padfoot, darling, you have forgotten your birthday."

Sirius froze. "What?"

The other three fourths of the Marauders beamed at him. "Your _birthday_ , you dolt." James said.

Sirius took in the autumn leaves, a hazy memory of the glaring number _three_ on his calendar, the large word of _November_ written at the top of the month.

"Christ," Sirius breathed. "You're right."

"Of course I'm right, I'm always right," James said pompously. "Anyway, we've all agreed to let you have the day off."

"Day off from what?" Sirius asked, confused.

"Day off from working," James explained vaguely, waving it off. "I mean, the Marauder's Map. We'll start, you can do whatever you want. Go hook up with someone. Go."

Sirius was practically already gone.

* * *

Sirius was alone.

It was Saturday. Lots of students were out and about the castle and roaming aimlessly around Hogsmeade, and Sirius had never spent a Saturday at Hogwarts without his mates. It was a strange feeling.

But a freeing feeling. It was his birthday! Sirius Black was eighteen. The official age of magic! He was an _adult!_ He wanted to twirl.

But he didn't. He was an adult, remember?

"Black?"

He turned around. There was McKinnon, shamefully good-looking girl. She was giving him an odd look.

"Yes, darling?" he said, smiling charmingly at her.

She frowned suspiciously. "Don't call me that. Why are you alone?" She stared around at the walls like the rest of his posse would come pouring out of the walls.

"McKinnon, you mean to tell me you _forgot_ my birthday?" Sirius said in mock outrage. He didn't mention that he himself had forgotten it. Pretty sad, once you think about it.

She blinked. "Oh. Happy birthday."

"Thank you," Sirius sniffed. "The Marauders are giving me a day off."

She raised an eyebrow. "A day off from what?"

"You know. _Marauding._ " Sirius said mysteriously.

"Right." she replied, rolling her eyes. "I'll see you around, Black."

"Where are _you_ going?" he asked, jogging a little behind her to keep up.

She glared at him. "I'm going to enjoy the afternoon."

"So am I!" Sirius said jovially. "Let's enjoy it together."

Suddenly she stopped. She stared pointedly and shrewdly at him. "I have a boyfriend." she stated clearly. "And he's your best mate."

Sirius frowned at her. "I know."

"Look." McKinnon said, holding up her hands. "You're a nice guy, but your crush on me is extremely obvious—"

" _What?_ " Sirius screeched. "McKinnon, I have not had a crush on you in all seven years that I have known you."

"You can deny it all you want." she sniffed. "I can tell. Lily can too."

"Evans?" he snorted. "That crazy ginger knows nothing."

"That crazy ginger is my best friend!"

"Because _both_ of you know nothing." Sirius responded, raising an eyebrow. "You know what? I've just decided I will not spoil my birthday with your presence. Afternoon, McKinnon." And he marched self-righteously outside.

 _Honestly. A crush on McKinnon! Crazy. Crazy, that's what that is._

"You can _not_ leave me here, Black!" she huffed from behind him. He could hear her approaching.

"Already have." he called back.

And then they were both on the grounds, side-by-side, neither talking to the other.

Sirius stopped. She stopped.

"I _can_ be friends with my best mate's girlfriend, alright?" Sirius told her, uncharacteristically mature.

She flushed. "Sure." she said, and then began walking again.

Sirius easily caught up with her. "So what's up, McKinnon?"

"If we're going to be friends, you're going to call me Marlene." she said sternly. "And I'll call you Sirius."

"Um, okay." Sirius said, rubbing the back of his neck. "Thanks for making this awkward."

"It was already awkward!"

" _Anyway_ ," Sirius said, frowning at her outburst. "What's up? Where's the crazy ginger?"

"Oh, Lily?" she said, looking up at him. "She's studying."

"She's always studying," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "I thought gingers were fun."

"No, blondes are fun." Marlene corrected.

"That's a lie," Sirius said, shaking his head. "Have you _seen_ Lucius Malfoy?"

"He has fun in the sheets," Marlene said suggestively, wiggling her shoulders a little. She laughed, blushing slightly.

Sirius stared at her. Her blush deepened. "What?"

"You made a joke," he said, suddenly grinning at her. "McKinnon, you're a joker!"

"It was a pretty bad joke," she said, smiling sheepishly.

"Yeah, it was a pretty bad joke," Sirius allowed. "But a joke all the same. I have never known the joker side of Marlene McKinnon."

"She rears her head sometimes," McKinnon said, shrugging. She smiled up at him.

They looked at each other for a moment, then tore their eyes away from each other. Sirius cleared his throat. "I have a boyfriend." he said, clearly mocking her from before.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, fuck off."

"I mean, James and I are practically dating," Sirius said, grinning boyishly at her. "He gets jealous if I look at another person too long."

She shook her head. "You are insane."

"Don't hide your obviously enormous crush on me," Sirius called back to her, beginning to run. She ran after him.

"Maybe when you stop hiding yours," she replied sarcastically, when she caught up. They were atop the hill overlooking the lake.

For a moment, no one spoke. The forest whispered pretty things to them, and they were wonderfully, blissfully unaware of how alone they were.

"Hogwarts is really lovely," Sirius realized suddenly. "Isn't it?"

Marlene stared out over the lake and across it's sparkling surface to the beautiful old castle, the autumn leaves of the forest casting dappled patterns across the path. "Yes." she replied. "Yes, it really is quite lovely."

"I'll be sad when we leave." Sirius said, hands in his pockets. "Won't you?" There was no expression on his face.

Marlene chewed on her lip. "Yes. Yes, I'll be sad."

"Filch will miss me." Sirius added, a tiny smile appearing on his face. "God, we're so old, Marlene."

Her stomach tingled at the sound of her name on his lips. "We're not old."

"We are." he argued, raising an eyebrow. "We're old. We're having counseling sessions with Dumbledore to figure out _jobs_."

"Did you figure out yours?" she asked, looking at him. "What are you going to do?"

"No, I haven't," Sirius replied, looking back over the hill. "Have you?"

"I want to work in the Ministry." she said, after a moment of thinking. "I'd like to do healing work, but Lily says I'd probably be better at yelling at people in the Ministry."

"True." Sirius agreed. He sat on the grass, patting the spot next to him. Marlene sat beside him.

"I never thought I'd want to have more schooling, but I suppose that is the case." Sirius said thoughtfully. "Funny, isn't it? I think I'll get a job somewhere in Diagon Alley and somehow get a house, then I'll start looking for a legitimate job."

"A job in Diagon Alley is a legitimate job." Marlene told him.

"No, no," Sirius waved his hand. "You know, neither of my parents work. They live off of the inheritance."

"Then you're set for life."

Sirius actually laughed out loud. "That's a joke. If they have any money left over after they die, Regulus is getting every last Knut."

A strange and warm sort of silence fell upon them, like the silences between old friends. They were not really friends at all, and that was why it was so strange.

"Are you joining the Order?" Sirius finally whispered into the cold air. His cheeks and nose were getting pinker, and his black hair danced gently around his face. Her throat closed up.

"I don't know." Marlene replied, when she had found her voice again.

"Marlene." Sirius said, and lay on the grass, propping his head up with his elbow. "You don't have to, you know."

"Yes, I do know that." she said, slightly annoyed.

"What does 'Marlene' mean, Marlene?"

"It means 'star of the sea'." Marlene replied, confused at the sudden question.

Sirius carefully brushed the hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear. He had such a tender and gentle look about him. "It's a pretty name, pretty Marlene."

Her mouth felt dry. "Thank you."

He was sitting up now. They were too close together.

"I have a boyf—" Marlene attempted weakly, but Sirius kissed her.

Somehow, he was laying down again, and she was on top of him. They stared at each other. They were panting.

"Stop me," Sirius said breathlessly, before he kissed her again.

His lips were cool and soft and addictively sweet. She couldn't stop him. She tried, but she couldn't.

It was as if every fight they'd ever had had led up to this moment. And it was inevitable.

"Fuck, McKinnon, I told you to stop me!" Sirius groaned, before kissing her again.

And then, as the last of the sun soaked into the autumn leaves and disappeared below the horizon, they sprang apart.

Marlene's hair was a mess. Their clothes were rumpled. "I-I—" She was trembling. She didn't know if she wanted to kiss him again or slap him in the face.

Sirius looked five times more beautiful than usual, but his entire face had gone white. "God, Remus— his _girlfriend_ —" And he stood up, brushing the dirt off his clothes.

"Sorry, " he got out.

And then he dashed off, leaving her dazed in the woods.

* * *

The other three fourths of the Marauders were in the dorms when Sirius returned.

James grinned at him, but Sirius felt sick to his stomach. He couldn't even _look_ at Remus.

"Looks like he got laid!" James joked, and Peter and Remus cheered.

Remus clapped him on the shoulder. "Happy birthday, mate." He smiled at him kindly. Sirius's heart turned over.

Turned out, they'd all gone out and gotten him presents. Sirius stared at the pile at the foot of his bed.

"We even sorted them out for you," James said, pointing to an equally large pink and red pile. "Those are the stuff from the fangirls. Not safe. Don't eat or touch anything."

James pointed to the other pile. "That's from us. Most are safe. I think."

"Thank you." Sirius, forcing a tight smile. His heart was screaming. "Really."

"No problem mate." James said kindly. "Dinner, then?"

"Actually, no." Sirius said quickly. "I'm— not feeling well."

"Oh no," Remus said, looking genuinely worried. "That's depressing. On your birthday?"

"Yeah, I guess." Sirius said, and sat on his bed. "You guys go on. I'll be alright."

The Marauders looked at each other. "Well, if you say so." they said, grinned at him, wished him a final happy birthday, and then disappeared.

Sirius lay on his bed and stared at the ceiling until morning came.

* * *

 **A/N: You can't have possibly expected me to keep Marlene and Remus together. And now there's some drama! It'll progress, don't worry. And somehow, Remus will not get hurt in the process. I protect my baby Remus at all costs. And yeah! I kind of wanted to upload this on Sirius's actual birthday, but it didn't happen, and I'm two days late. Sorry!**

 **And sorry this chapter isn't really funny at all. And that "Move Bitch" isn't a song from the 70s. It seems like a Sirius-esque song, sue me.**

 **Review?**


	16. Confidantes

_Chapter 15_

The snow was falling, thick and brilliant, and it was the end of November. The pumpkins and skeletons that had been left behind after Halloween were reluctantly fading into whispers of Christmas trees and a single string of lights on the Ravenclaw staircase.

Lily Evans was curled up in an armchair in the Gryffindor Common Room, knees tucked to her chest. She was staring dreamily out the window, the fat snowflakes lazily floating down from the grey sky and sparkling on the terraces and spiral towers.

There was already a Christmas Ball poster on the wall. Lily had turned her nose up at it, then walked away to eat chocolate and rant to Alice and Dorcas about not having a boyfriend.

Someone threw himself on the sofa next to her, breaking her out of her thoughts. She glanced at him. Sirius Black grinned back at her.

"Oh, hello, Black," she said, then turned back to the window.

Sirius didn't waste any time. "Evans, I need to talk to you."

"That much is evident." Lily said absently, not turning to him. "About what?"

"Um, about McKinnon."

Lily yawned. The snow winked at her from under the cold sunlight. "What about Marlene?"

"Um. I kissed her."

Lily nearly choked, then fell halfway off the chair. " _What?_ "

"I kissed Marlene." Sirius repeated, staring at her with eyes the size of golf balls.

Lily smacked him with a pillow. "What the _hell?_ Does Remus know?"

Sirius grimaced; turned pale. "No."  
"Does Potter know?"

Sirius sighed. "No."

"You haven't told Pettigrew, have you?"

"Nope."

"Black. Am I the _only one_ who knows?"

"And McKinnon," Sirius added helpfully.

Lily blinked a few times and shook her head. "Black. _Sirius_. I don't understand."

"Neither do I," Sirius responded in a defeated sort of tone. "McKinnon hasn't talked to me all month."

"Has it really been a month since it happened?" Lily asked, horrified that Marlene had kept that secret from her for so long.

"Yes. It happened on my birthday."

Lily was silent for a moment. Then: "Did _you_ initiate it?"

Sirius was staring at his hands. "Yes."

"Did she kiss you _back?_ "

"Yes."

Lily rubbed her face. "Oh God."

"Yeah."

Lily looked up at Sirius in some form of desperation. "Marlene doesn't cheat. She's not like that."

Sirius shrugged noncommittally.

She hummed to herself, thinking hard. The red Gryffindor rug blurred and shimmered across her vision.

"She must like you." Lily said finally. She looked at Sirius. "Do you like her?"

Sirius squirmed under her gaze, eyes jumping around the room. "Maybe," he said uncomfortably, though he wasn't sure if he meant it or not.

Lily scrutinized him for a long moment.

"I like you, Black." she said. "And I believe you and Marlene are good for each other." Sirius opened his mouth to interrupt, but she held up her finger. "I also believe that you like each other. Don't deny it, Black. I don't think you'd kiss your best mate's girlfriend for no reason, and I don't think she'd kiss you for no reason, especially when she's in a relationship. I think you and Marlene need to talk about it together, and I think you need to tell Remus."

Sirius blanched at that last sentence. "I can't."

"You have to. So does Marlene." Lily replied calmly. "I think the best thing to do right now is for me to show you my newest vinyl." She grinned at him. "I think you'd like them."

She stood up and straightened her burgundy sweater. "Are you coming?"

"Wait, aren't you mad?" Sirius asked, getting up to follow her. "Don't you hate me?"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Men are so dramatic. No, I don't hate you."

Sirius took a wondering sort of breath. "Do you think Marlene hates me?"

"Nobody hates you, Black. Get over yourself." Lily responded. "Now, come look at my music before I drag you."

Sirius looked at her for a long moment. "You know, Evans, you're pretty cool."

She shrugged, smiling a little. "Thanks."

And then the two of them went to geek out over a couple of tracks.

* * *

There was a boy standing by the moving staircases. He had a sweet sort of face, and hair that fell perfectly into striking eyes. He had the sort of look of a shy boy that didn't know that all the girls liked him. Which is undeniably attractive.

Lily was standing on the opposite side of hall, chewing on her lip and wondering what the hell she was doing. She was clutching her bag like it was her lifeline. It was utter _suicide_ to go through with this without Marlene coaching her by her side.

The boy on the other side of the hall smiled gently and helped a First Year who had dropped all his books on the ground.

Making up her mind, Lily sucked in her cheeks and started forward bravely. Oh, he was _worth it_.

She reached the boy, smiling a little too wide and extremely conscious of her clammy hands. "Um, hi, Todd." she said.

He smiled at her. "Hi, Lily. What's up?"

"Um." Lily said again, tucking her hair behind her ear. "James Potter has decided to take over his Head Boy duties."

"Oh," said the boy, deflating a little, though his starry smile remained intact. "That's good."

"Yeah." Lily said. She toed at an imperfection on the stone floor. "Are you free this weekend?" Her palms were sweating.

"I think so." he said, nodding as he thought back. "But I think there's a Transfiguration test on Monday."

Lily swelled a little. _Oh, they were perfect for each other_.

"Would you—I mean, it's stupid really—mind going to Hogsmeade with me?" Lily blurted out, when she worked up the courage.

Todd blinked. "Oh. _Oh_. I mean, Lily, I'd love to, but—"

Lily winced. Here it came. The _but_.

"—but wouldn't James Potter be mad?"

Lily swelled like an angry bullfrog. "Well, it's honestly none of his business who I'm hanging out with." she said, raising her chin a little.

Todd still looked a little wary.

"I'll tell him personally to let you alone." Lily added, when he didn't look convinced.

Todd sucked in a breath, then let it out. "Well—oh, alright."

Lily could've flown to the moon. She could've hugged Todd. Here it was, the end of the unforgiving cycle of perpetual single-ness!

"Oh. Alright, it's a date then." she said shyly, and beamed up at him. He blushed.

* * *

Sirius was alone in the Common Room and listening to Lily's vinyl when she reappeared at the door, flushed and sparkling.

"Black, I've decided we're going to be friends," Lily said, sitting next to him. "You can be my confidante."

Sirius raised an eyebrow, a little freaked out. "Um, aren't confidantes only women?"

She ignored him. "Guess what I just did." she said, turning to him with the excitement of a five-year-old. " _Guess!_ "

 _I hope Marlene never leaves her again_ , Sirius thought to himself. "Wha—"

" _I asked out a boy!_ " Lily squealed.

Sirius blinked, and twisted around to face her. "What? Why? Who?"

"I asked out _Todd Winston_ ," she said, eyes wide with amazement at her own victory. "And he said _yes_."

"That tosser!" Sirius said, despite himself.

Lily smacked him in the arm. "He is _not_ a tosser!"

"I can't betray my darling James," Sirius told her apologetically.

Her eyes widened in realization. "Oh, _shit!_ " she swore. "Sorry, Black , I have to go!"

"Can I keep your vinyl?" he asked, when she shut the door behind her.

He settled comfortably into the sofa. "I'll take that as a yes."

* * *

There was a boy standing by the moving staircases. He had a cocky sort of face, and hair that fell perfectly into striking eyes. He had the look of a arrogant boy who knew that all the girls liked him. Which is infuriatingly attractive.

"My lovely Lily-flower," James said as a greeting, and mock-bowed. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

She frowned at him. "The Head Patrol, I suppose." she said, and then began walking without waiting for him.

He caught up with her. "How are you, Evans?"

"Quite well, thank you." she responded shortly, turning a corner. She sternly told off a couple of Sixth Years making out on the staircase.

"Do you enjoy being a cock-block, Lily?" James asked conversationally. He was juggling an apple, handling it the way he usually did a Snitch.

She glared at him. "I enjoy doing my _job_."

He smirked at her. "You're jealous."

Her eye was twitching. "Of _what?_ "

"Of _them_ ," James answered, jabbing his thumb at their retreating backs.

"Fuck off, Potter," Lily spat, and kept walking.

"You're just proving your jealousy." James pointed out, jogging a little to keep up.

"I am _not_ jealous of anyone, James Potter!" Lily burst out, temper rising. "What would I even be jealous about?"

James mimed an explicit act. She shot a curse at his face. Which he dodged, of course.

"Why are you an asshole?" she asked angrily. "I'll have you know I have a date for this weekend, and it is most definitely not you."

James's jaw dropped. "Wait, you were serious about that?"

"What did you think?" Lily shouted. "Of course I was serious!" She whirled around to face a terrified Third Year. "Fifteen points from Slytherin!"

"Who did you ask out?" James demanded, walking quickly behind her.

She raised her chin. "Todd Winston." she replied clearly, popping each syllable to aggravate him further.

"That tosser!" he said indignantly.

"Shut up!"

They were still arguing when they reached the Gryffindor Common Room. Sirius was sitting on the sofa, bobbing his head to Lily's music while he did his Potions homework.

"Padfoot!" James said shrilly. "Evans asked out Todd Winston!"

Sirius sighed sadly. He knew this was coming."I know."

"What do you mean you _know?_ " James was having a tantrum. "Is _everyone_ against me?"

Remus appeared from the stairs, sleepy-eyed and wearing a faded t-shirt. "What is everyone shouting about?"

Peter appeared behind him. "Lily and James are fighting again."

Remus yawned, rubbing his eyes. "Oh."

Lily poked James in the chest, a _little_ harder than necessary. "You promised not to interfere." she said, voice suddenly dangerously quiet.

James winced, rubbing the spot where she _stabbed_ him. "I know." He glared at the floor.

"Then don't interfere." she said, sniffing at his obviously childish behavior. "I think that's enough excitement for one night. Goodnight, all." She flounced up the stairs.

"Goodnight," three-fourths of the Marauders chorused. And then they made for their dormitories, with Sirius patting James sympathetically on the back.

James stared at the floor.

Sirius reappeared. "We're going to fuck that boy up." he muttered, when he was sure everyone else was gone. He grinned. "He'll be dreading the weekend."

And both boys were sporting identically evil and slightly concerning grins when they went to bed.

* * *

 **A/N: Sorry for the long wait! I have no excuse for it this time. Except for:**

 **1\. No inspiration. I need to write every day or I'll forget my stream of ideas. Sorry.**

 **2\. Trump became president of my country and I can never be happy again. What the hell, America?**

 **Review?**


	17. Tap Water

_Chapter 16_

Todd Winston, that overlooked boy with the generic name was sitting outside the Ravenclaw Common Room, parchment on his lap. He was doing his homework. Or was he?

No, he wasn't. There was a Second Year boy sitting next to him, with a round face and pink cheeks, a thatch of thick brown hair. He was swinging his legs and looking very hard at the parchment in Todd Winston's lap.

"There," Todd finished gently. "Do you understand?" He gave the boy a very kind smile.

The boy snatched the parchment off of Todd's lap and assessed the older boy's work. He tilted his head and grinned a little back at Todd. "Yeah, I think so."

"Good," Todd said, standing up and stretching. "Have you eaten lunch?"

"Nope," the boy said, already skipping away. "Thanks!"

Todd watched the boy go. "No problem," he replied, almost to himself. Then he picked up his bookbag and went to eat a lonely lunch at the Gryffindor table.

* * *

Lily saw Todd eating alone at the opposite side of the Gryffindor table. Frowning, she picked up her things and went over, dropping her things beside him. He looked up at her, surprised, then smiled. "Oh, hello, Lily."

"Hello," she responded, sitting down. "What are you doing all alone?"

"Well," Todd said, frowning a little. "Something happened this morning. Suddenly, all my friends are angry at me." He grinned and shrugged sheepishly. "I must have done something to upset them."

Lily's frown deepened. "Well, that's stupid. What could you have done?"

He shrugged again. "I'm not quite sure," he said, then handed her the bread basket. "Would you like some?"

"No, thank you," Lily said distractedly, pushing her hair behind her ear. "Good God, who'd get mad at you?"

He blushed a little. "Oh, thank you."

"It's not an opinion or a compliment," Lily told him, frowning. "It's a fact."

"Well, I think I'll ask them later on today." he said, buttering his bread. "Do you like French music?"

She gave him a strange look, but smiled despite herself. "Well— I'm not sure, I've never heard it."

"Well, I know you like music. And I like France," he continued. "I want to go to Paris." He gave her a sideways smile. "City of lights, you know? Britain is so drab and grey. And croissants. I love croissants."

"Britain is quite dull," Lily conceded thoughtfully. "That's strange. I never thought of that before."

"You and I can go to Paris together," he told her. "If my friends stay angry with me."

"No one can stay angry at you," Lily smiled at him gently. There were tiny pinpricks of sunlight in his eyes, reflections of candlelight and glistening with thoughts of Paris.

"Oh, well, then you can come anywa—"

His tea suddenly exploded.

Lily had jumped backwards, falling off the bench and hitting her head on the stone floor. Her brain screamed with pain. She swung her legs off the bench and onto the cold ground, rubbing her temple with her eyes shut.

Todd was still sitting on the bench, the tea staining his clothes, his skin red and blistering with the burns from the tea and a bewildered expression on his face.

Immediately, he got off the bench and helped Lily stand, his face full of concern. "Oh, God, are you alright?" he asked, looking slightly terrified. "I'm so sorry, that was all my fault—"

"UNHAND HER, YOU SCOUNDREL!"

Todd let go of her as if he'd been burned. (Again.)

"How dare you allow Lily to get hurt?" James Potter asked, wearing a terrible expression of self-righteousness and anger. Sirius Black was standing behind him, smirking. James was gripping Lily's elbow, and there was a slight, unfamiliar twinge of green jealousy in his left eye.

"I-I'm sorry," Todd said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"Shut up, Potter," Lily snarled, shoving him away from her. She grabbed Todd's arm, careful of the burns. "Todd, you're hurt." She waved her wand gently, and a steady stream of cold water fell on his blisters. He winced, and glanced at James, who looked ready to murder him.

"Lily, he's fine," James said through gritted teeth, his hero pretense on the floor and shriveling away. He took her elbow again. "You need help from the Hospital Wing, that was a bad fall—"

"James _fucking_ Potter," Lily snarled, whipping around with her wand poised straight at his throat. The water splattered from its tip onto his clothes, but he didn't move.

Sirius hesitantly touched Lily's shoulder. "Hey, Lily, chill out—"

"No," Lily said quietly, deathly calm. The entire Gryffindor table had gone completely since she had fallen. Only a few of them had seen James Potter lift his wand and point it so discreetly, so teasingly at Todd Winston's cup of tea—

" _You_ did that to his tea, I know it, don't deny it," she spat. "Apologize. Now."

"I didn't do anything!" James said angrily. "Don't _accuse_ me of—"

" _You did it!_ " Lily shouted suddenly, and her wand went off with a bang. She had a terrible glint in her eye.

There was only a moment before Todd had leapt in front of Lily's wand, in front of James, the curse knocked him unconscious to the floor, and Sirius and James stared at her with wide eyes.

The stone dragons and gargoyles molded to the wall trembled. Breaths went in and out of Lily's mouth, they were colored white but were getting stained with scarlet-colored fear.

"Oh, God," she said. Her wand dropped from her fingers.

And Lily thought she was a good person. And good people fall to the ground and take the person they have hurt to the Hospital Wing.

But apparently Lily _wasn't_ a good person. So she turned on her heel and ran.

* * *

Lily was in the washroom. She had the tap on, but the lights were off. She didn't want to see herself in the mirror.

Lily's hands were in the sink. It was such a repeated, familiar pattern. The water slipped down her fingers and then disappeared with the last traces of her guilt.

A knock came at the door. "Lily?"

She didn't reply. It was such a repeated, familiar pattern. You couldn't break patterns.

"Lily, open the damn door!"

Marlene. She had missed Marlene. Good thing she had returned. She wouldn't be able to stand it if she hadn't.

"Lily, it's really not a big deal—"

 _It is a big deal_ , Lily thought furiously. The water ran down her fingers. _I hurt him. I hurt people_.

"Stand back, McKinnon—"

There was a _bang!_ and then Sirius Black and Marlene McKinnon were standing there and looking at her in worry.

 _They made such a pretty couple_ , Lily thought in bemusement. She was still staring at the water, how it fell down her fingers.

"Lily," Marlene said in one breath, and ran towards her, hugging her. Sirius turned off the water tap. "Lily, what have you done to yourself?" Lily's fingers were red and raw.

"I have your wand," Sirius said awkwardly, and rubbed the back of his neck. He handed it to her. Lily didn't take it, so Marlene put it in her back pocket.

Marlene sat Lily on the floor. Sirius turned on the light. Marlene gasped suddenly; and gripped Lily's arm. Lily stared at the floor.

"Lily, your head—" Marlene had her fingers in her mouth. "Lily, what the hell?"

Sirius touched Lily's fiery hair. His hand came away with blood. "Fuck," he said, then immediately waved his wand over the spot where she had been hurt.

Marlene hugged her tightly, combing her fingers through Lily's greasy curls. "Lily," she kept repeating, and pressed her lips to her friend's head. "God, I'm never leaving you again."

And no matter how tightly Lily's teeth pressed down on her bottom lip, she began to cry. The tears spilled down her cheeks and dripped down her neck. She buried her face in Marlene's neck.

"Oh, Lily, love," Marlene said, and held her tighter. "It's alright. Todd is okay, if that's what's bothering you. But you hit your head, and you need to make sure nothing serious happened. Okay?"

"I'm sorry," Lily croaked through her tears. "I'm sorry."

"Fuck manly morals," Sirius announced, and then put his arms around them both. "Lily, James is a fucker."

Lily cried harder, her fingers hooking onto Marlene's silver bracelet and Sirius's shirt.

And slowly, when her sobs subsided, Marlene rubbing soothing circles on her back, she sniffed, and then gave a strange sob/laugh.

"So I'm guessing you aren't up for dinner?" Marlene asked, grinning a little.

Lily gave another sob/laugh. Sirius grinned at Marlene. "Cool, because I brought food."

So Sirius went and got Lily's vinyl and they sat on the washroom floor and laughed and ate cold turkey. And somehow, it turned out okay, and Sirius and Marlene were happy, and Lily was happy.

Everything was alright.

* * *

 **A/N: This was the most serious chapter I've written. *blinks* Sorry about that, chaps. Part of the plot. Keeps it moving. Think James is an asshole? Don't worry, he'll redeem himself. And Todd Winston? I love that sweet little bastard. He's one of the nicest characters I've ever created. I've got to get that bitch a girlfriend. (Not Lily, cough cough cough)**

 **Review?**


	18. Moonlit Skin

_Chapter 17_

Severus Snape was sitting in the Hospital Wing.

He'd been in the Hospital Wing before. Twice, actually, when he'd been stupid enough to get into a duel with Potter. Four against one? When the hell was that ever fair?

 _Pettigrew didn't count_ , he supposed, as he sat down at a stool. How Pettigrew managed to befriend Lupin, Black and Potter astounded and confused him to no end.

The Hospital Wing was white and streaming with sunlight. The walls themselves were blinding, as if they were forcing a sunny attitude on you. It smelled like medicine and lemony-scented soap.

The boy on the farthest bed had a bandage wrapped around his head. He was sleeping, very peacefully. Severus was sitting beside his bed.

Madam Pomfrey appeared from her private chambers. "Oh! Mister Snape, do you have a pass?"

"Visitor," Severus answered shortly, without looking at her.

"Ah," Madam Pomfrey said, after a long, awkward silence, and shifted uncomfortably. "Well. When the bell rings, I expect you to be gone. Is that clear?"

Severus didn't reply. Madam Pomfrey shook her head once, muttered something about moody teenagers, and disappeared the way she'd come.

The boy lying in front of Severus stirred slightly, but didn't wake up.

"Todd Winston," Severus murmured quietly, studying the boy's light features, and the way the blinding sunlight shone on his face. He had an earthy, warm sort of musk to him. All the girls liked Todd Winston. But Lily, _his_ Lily, what did she see in Winston?

"Ordinary," Severus breathed, and felt his chest clench painfully. "Completely, utterly ordinary." His fingers trembled. He wanted to lift his wand and curse the boy into oblivion.

But how peaceful he was. He slept like an angel, and the sunlight created unearthly patterns on his face. Red blood would ruin it, would ruin the picture of angelic innocence.

Severus himself, a picture of black anger and darkness in the sunny, sparkling Hospital Wing was a strange sight as well. Two things ruined, two bad pictures—

Severus remembered how Todd Winston had leapt in front of James Potter, protecting him, and Severus smiled a little. _He_ would have never done that.

Silly boy. Silly, stupid boy. Severus stood up, swept his cloak around him, and left.

* * *

"I'm an idiot." James Potter said suddenly, as if he had been struck by lightning and seen a vision of revelation.

"True." Sirius agreed. He released the Snitch in his left palm, and Remus caught it.

"No, really," James said, turning around and staring at his best mate. "I'm a complete, utter idiot."

"That you are." Sirius replied, as Remus tossed the Snitch back to him.

"Winston is— kind," James said, struggling to get the words out. "Kind and chivalrous and shit. Girls like that, don't they?"

"I guess," Sirius responded, lazily poking the drifting Snitch with his wand.

"Padfoot, you're not listening to me. I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have exploded that wanker's tea."

"I know."

"Now I feel guilty as hell because that bastard just _had_ to jump in front of me." James cursed, beginning to pace. " _Now_ what am I supposed to do? I can't just let him _have_ Lily."

"You also bewitched all his friends to stop talking to him," Sirius added.

"No, I got rid of that," James said, waving it off. "I thought maybe I'd stop feeling guilty. But I don't, dammit!"

"Tough luck." Sirius yawned. "And Lily's had a concussion, have you heard?"

"The hell is that?"

"Concussion. Head injury. Muggle diagnosis. Pomfrey fixed it up in a second, but it's pretty bad in the Muggle world. Apparently, she could've died."

"Fuck," James said, breathing hard. " _I_ did that."

"James," Remus suddenly interjected loudly, from his place lying on the floor. He was studying a map of Hogwarts in _Hogwarts, A History_ , and was slowly and steadily copying it onto a plain brown piece of parchment.

"What?" James looked at his friend desperately. "I'm done for. She hates me."

"She doesn't _hate_ you, Prongsie," Sirius said, his voice turning from monotone to exasperated. "That's what we've all been trying to tell you. She gets so mad because she hates that she _likes_ a bastard like you."

"I'm not a bastard!"

"That's not the point!" Peter told him sternly. "Though you are— oi, _shut up!_ The point is that she _likes_ you, and your job now is to make her actually _like_ liking you."

"What?"

"James, I understand your brain is too puny to understand things of this much complication," Remus snapped, who was getting a migraine. "but I thought you might understand if we threw in the name _Lily_. Honestly, you're an asshole, and Lily's far too good to like an asshole. Therefore, you need to stop _being_ an asshole, and then she can like you without feeling shitty about herself. Savvy?"

Silence.

"Oh." James said in a small voice.

"Yeah." Sirius said, raising an eyebrow.

"How do I stop being an asshole?" James asked, and sat on the floor next to Remus. "I'm an asshole at heart."

"Maybe try winning her over, rather than physically attacking any person who shows even a sliver of interest in her." Remus suggested dryly. "That's a start."

"Maybe befriend Todd Winston," Peter threw in an idea.

Both Sirius and James made a face. Sirius pretended to gag.

"Fine, if you're too immature," Remus snapped. Then, in a softer voice: "Ask out someone else, _not_ Alicia, that's nice and a good person. If you take your attention away from her, it allows her more room to breathe, and maybe her jealousy will make her understand that she really _does_ like you."

"Wait, date a good person?" James looked nervously at Sirius. "I've never done that before."

"Then why the hell are you going after Lily?" Remus shouted. "She is the epitome of a good person!"

"True," James agreed. "But, who? I can only date girls with boobs."

Peter smacked him in the back of the head. "All girls have boobs, genius."

"James means girls with boobs that look fake but aren't," Sirius explained wisely.

Remus sighed in consternation. He rubbed his temples.

"We'll deal with that later. Right now, you're going to go find Lily Evans, and apologize."

"What?" James sputtered. "She'll try to curse me again!"

"Better take the curse than let one of her potential boyfriends do it for you," Sirius said unhelpfully.

James glared at him. Sirius shrugged. "It's true."

James gritted his teeth, shot Sirius an obscene hand sign, and then left to find Lily Evans.

* * *

Lily was in the Hospital Wing. She was sitting on the bed next to Todd's.

The bed heaved under another weight. She glanced to her right, and there was James Potter, looking as if he had swallowed a lemon that was, in reality, a colony for microscopic ants.

She blinked at her own imagination. "Potter?"

"Evans. Lily. Lily-flower," He gave a small, desperate smile. "I— I'm sorry." The lemon idea came back again. Lily imagined a microscopic ant crawling out from his nostril and grimaced.

James misinterpreted her grimace. "Really. I promise you. I'm sorry. And yeah, I _did_ bewitch the tea, because I was jealous, and I did _not_ expect either of you to get hurt. I just thought it was funny. And well, I also bewitched his friends to stop talking to him, which backfired because then _you_ started talking to him, and I'm sorry for that too, and I got rid of that. So, yeah. I'm sorry. Again."

He twisted his hands together in his lap. "I hope you can forgive me."

Lily raised an eyebrow. James swallowed every bit of his pride. "I have money," he said, chewing on the inside of his cheek, and handed her a bag of Galleons.

Lily raised the other eyebrow. "Potter, I don't want your money."

James went down on his knees. "Please, Evans, have mercy. Please don't kill me."

"I'm not going to kill you," Lily said, looking surprised. "And I never was. I'm also sorry for trying to curse you. I lost my temper."

James stood up, looking relieved. "Then I'll just take that back," he said, awkwardly taking the bag of Galleons from her lap. "Heh."

She frowned. "I think you owe Todd an apology, not me."

The lemon image was spelled out over his face again. "Uh, yeah, maybe I'll come back later."

Her frown deepened, but she sighed. She had expected that.

James could not bear the sight of her disappointment. "Fine, fine, I'll stay until he wakes up." he grumbled, sitting down next to her again.

It was worth it. She smiled at him. Hesitantly, he smiled back.

"Potter, I've been thinking," she said, chewing on her bottom lip. "I think we should be just friends."

His heart sank. His smile crumbled away. "Oh."

"I know we kissed, and we went on dates, and that was all fun, but I really _do_ want to start, um, what do you call it? Branching out."

"Evans, we aren't even dating," James said, in slight annoyance. "I don't care." Though he did care, and he was pretty sure she knew that.

She continued worrying at her bottom lip. "Okay."

He forced on a smile and bumped her shoulder. "Branching out, yeah? Your wild side making an appearance in the last year of school?"

"Oh, shut up," Lily said, but smiled radiantly at him. There was genuine relief in her eyes.

It hurt like hell.

James was quiet until Todd woke up, which worried Lily a little.

"Lily?" Todd had muttered, looking at her through half-shut eyelids.

"Todd," she said, and hugged him. James remained stiff beside her, staring firmly out the window.

Todd coughed. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry for cursing you, Todd," Lily burst out. "I'm so sorry."

"And I'm sorry for, uh, exploding your tea." James put in awkwardly. "And bewitching your friends. So, it was cool of you to take that curse for me. I guess." _Kill me now_.

Lily nudged him, and stared pointedly at his bag of Galleons. James shot her a furious look. _I am not giving this wanker money!_

But she glared at him dangerously, staring insistently at his bag of Galleons.

Gritting his teeth, James opened his bag and pulled out a single, beloved coin. "Here," he said gruffly, and tossed it onto Todd's face.

"Oh," Todd said, picking it up. "Thank you!"

There was a long, pregnant silence, during which James wore his lemon-microscopic-ant expression.

"So this has been fun," (Not really.) James finally said loudly. "But I think I'm late for class." (As always.) And he ran out of there as fast as his legs could carry him.

* * *

Lily was sitting in the Common Room. The fireplace was warm and bright, and the room itself was cozy and quiet. She was wearing a pretty periwinkle dress, with spaghetti-straps and a comfy cardigan thrown on top. It had been a birthday present from her mum.

She fingered the strap of it. Todd Winston had just cancelled their weekend date, shaky and sweaty. _Not_ because he didn't like her, because he did, but because he didn't think they were meant for more than friends.

So there it was. Another failed attempt at relationships.

She turned a page in her Charms book, fingers trembling like a newborn leaf. And yet, she still thought Todd and her would've made a good couple.

"Hey baby," Marlene McKinnon sat beside her. "You look cute today. What's up?"

"Todd cancelled our weekend date," Lily sighed.

Marlene frowned. "Aw. That sucks. We can go out with the girls!"

"Alice and Dorcas?" Lily asked, smiling a little. "Marlene, want to date?"

"I wish, because that would be _so_ hot," Marlene nudged her friend, who laughed. "But I'm dating a very handsome, kind and wonderful man named Remus Lupin."

"Ah," Lily said, scooting towards her. "How is that going?"

Marlene had a fake smile plastered across her mauve lipsticked mouth. "Very well."

Lily studied her friend's face. Marlene's eyes fell towards the licking flames of the fireplace.

"Hmmm," Lily said. "I'll say that smile is very telling."

"What?" Marlene said defensively. "I don't have to be in love with him. I have time."

Lily poked at the fireplace with her wand, and the fire flickered. "You can say that there aren't any sparks."

Marlene sighed, and put her chin on Lily's shoulder. "I'm not in love with him." she repeated.

"Oh, Marlene," Lily replied. "Have you kissed yet? You've been dating for a long time."

Silence.

"Once," Marlene whispered quietly. "He—after one of our dates, I mean, absolutely gentlemanly—tilted my chin up, and he kissed me, and he's not a bad kisser, Lily, but it didn't _feel_ right. And I think he felt that too, and we haven't kissed since, and even saying the _word_ 'kissed' makes me shudder."

"I don't think that's how it's supposed to be," Lily said, raising an eyebrow.

Another silence.

"Lily," Marlene whispered again. "Lily, I have a secret, and it's been bothering me all month— you won't tell, will you? I-I—" Marlene bit down on her bottom lip. "Oh, God, it's terrible."

Lily knew what she was talking about. "You know you can tell me anything."

"I kissed— someone else," Marlene murmured evasively. There was a stain of red across both her cheeks. "And I liked it. No, I _loved_ it. And I like him. More than Remus. It didn't feel wrong. Oh, but it _did_ feel wrong, but—"

Lily grabbed her friend's worried hands. "Marlene, calm down. Take a breath."

Marlene took three breaths. "Okay, okay, I've calmed down."

"I know who you're talking about," Lily said matter-of-factly. "And I will tell you the same thing I told him— you have to tell Remus."

"You know?" Marlene nearly shrieked. Then, in a quieter voice: " _You know?_ "

"Of course I know, he told me." Lily replied. "Don't worry, we're the only three who know."

"I'm worrying," Marlene said. "Oh God, he probably told half the school that I'm unfaithful to Remus—" She looked as if she wanted to cry.

"Mar, he didn't," Lily said, smiling at her. "Sirius is a good guy when he wants to be. And I, for one, happen to think you are perfect for each other."

Marlene rubbed her head. "Oh _God_."

"That doesn't mean for a _second_ that I support what you two have done," Lily said sternly. "But I do think Remus is a good man, and has the right to know."

"What if it breaks his heart?" Marlene said through her tears.

"It won't, if he doesn't even want to kiss you," Lily told her bluntly.

"Maybe he doesn't kiss me because he knows _I_ don't want to kiss him!" Marlene argued.

Lily gave her a look. "Marlene."

Silence.

"So when do I tell him?" Marlene stared at her best friend with glistening, wide eyes. "Today? Now?"

"No," Lily said gently. "You and Sirius can do it together. As soon as possible, okay? And break up with him. Gently."

Marlene took a shuddering breath. "You're right. Okay."

* * *

"Evans?" James had a lump in his throat. Damn, she was so beautiful. How could he stay _just friends?_ He woke and dreamt with the taste of her smile on his lips. He craved her kiss, he was hungry just to taste the white, moonlit skin of her throat—

Her blue dress trailed against the floor. She pulled her cardigan closer around her, her fiery hair falling around the soft curves of her shoulder.

She smiled a little nervously at him. She must have noticed the way he looked at her: as if he was starving.

"Why do you always act as if you're surprised to see me here?" she laughed. "I live here too, you know."

They were on the Astronomy Tower. It was a place James reserved for just _them_. No one else wanted to climb up a drafty tower staircase just to view the black forest in the freezing winter cold.

Snow settled on her lashes and red hair. She shivered. He could not tear his eyes away from her.

James took off his jacket and settled it around her shoulders. "Cold?"

She laughed again. "I have a cardigan on, take this back," she said, and handed his jacket back to him.

He felt slightly stupid, and took his jacket back. "Ah."

Lily noticed the awkward expression on his face. "I mean, thanks." she said quickly. "But, I mean, I don't need it—" She blinked, frowned. "Oh, dammit." she said, and took the jacket back and put it on.

"You are something else, Lily Evans," James told her, unable to fight the growing smile on his face.

"Thanks."

They stood there for a few moments.

James felt ready to burst. He could not bear just standing there with this girl, so lovely and pristine, without reaching out to touch her. He shoved his hands in his pockets and pressed his lips into a line, staring out into the cold. The wind stung his eyes.

"Well, goodnight, Evans," he said finally, and unable to resist, slung a gentle hand around the curve of her waist and pressed his lips to her temple.

Before she had the chance to murder him, he let go and disappeared down the staircase.

Lily, slightly shocked, brushed her hand over the spot where he had kissed her. "Goodnight," she replied wonderingly into the darkness, but he was gone.

* * *

 **A/N: I'm on Thanksgiving break, and I'm going to try really, really hard to update every day. Oh God, I've lost the humor in this story, haven't I? *gasps in horror* I just don't know how to bring it back! I'll try, people, but in the meantime: Review?**


	19. Cheers to That

_Chapter 18_

Dorcas Meadowes. One of the most underrated girls in their year. Incredibly pretty, incredibly smart, incredibly sweet. She was a beautiful black girl with bronze skin a little darker than James', and hair that was dark brown and curly. _She_ was the one that Remus had picked out for James.

James's palms were sweating. If there was one girl that would turn him down, it was Dorcas. (Well, besides Lily.) (And Marlene, probably.) (And Alice.) (Okay, maybe there were a couple girls that would turn him down.)

"Fuckity-fuck-fuck," James commented.

"That's a new one," Sirius said, impressed.

"Why can't Moony be here, again?" James hissed. Sirius, Peter, and him were all huddled under the Invisibility Cloak in the Great Hall, where the Seventh Years were taking an Ancient Runes test.

"Because he's on a date with Marlene," Peter hissed back. "Pay attention!"

Sirius, who's face had gone white at the word _Marlene_ , prodded James in the back. "Yeah, pay attention!"

"Just do what we practiced," Peter said encouragingly.

"Oh, yeah. You made a great Dorcas, Sirius."

Sirius shrugged modestly. "One of my many talents."

The bell rang, and the Seventh Years hurriedly leapt up and began packing their things.

James took a deep breath. "Alright, here goes," he said, and Sirius shot him a thumbs-up. Peter starting eating a banana.

He pulled off the Invisibility Cloak and crammed it into his pocket. Dorcas was talking amidst a couple of her friends. James realized that Dorcas was very pretty when she laughed.

Awkwardly, James sidled up to her. "Hi," he said, and cleared his throat when she didn't look at him.

She turned. "Oh," she said, sounding mildly surprised. "Hello, James." She looked at him a little suspiciously.

James could not get the words, " _Will you go out with me?_ " out of his mouth. At that particular moment, James realized that this was a _terrible_ idea. He and Dorcas didn't even _know_ each other. And Dorcas was not a fling kind of girlfriend— she was the real thing.

James' mouth was open, but he hadn't said anything. Abruptly, he closed it, and swallowed.

She was wearing a small, concerned sort of smile. "Yes?"

His mouth felt dry. He licked his lips, pasted on a signature _I'm-James-Potter-I'm-super-hot_ grin. "How do you think you did on the final?" he asked instead.

Her smile grew in confusion. "Um, alright, I think. Did you take it yet?"

"Um, no." James said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I was hoping you could give me a few pointers." He sounded like the biggest loser in all of Hogwarts.

Her smile was now tinged with awkward sympathy. He wanted to curl up in a ball and die. James Potter was not a loser! He wasn't!

"Uh, sure." she said kindly. "It wasn't very difficult. All you have to know is..."

And as she showed him exactly how to compute an asphodel equation, they disappeared down the hallway, receiving dumbfounded looks from her friends and obscene hand gestures from Sirius Black.

* * *

Dorcas Meadowes appeared in a flurry of red and gold into the Girls Dormitory. "Girls, I think James Potter was trying to hit on me."

Lily's ears perked up. She was hidden near the window on Marlene's bed, using her friend's notes to do her Potions homework.

But Alice had leapt up and run over to her best friend. " _What?_ When?"

"After the Ancient Runes test," Dorcas said a little breathlessly, as the rest of the girls crowded around her in excitement. "He was asking me how the test went."

"James Potter?" Alice said, not entirely convinced. " _James Potter_ wanted to know how the Ancient Runes test went?"

"He's not entirely incompetent in school," Dorcas defended. "I happen to know he had some of the best marks on finals. That's why he's Head Boy."

"James Potter is _Head Boy?_ " some of the girls repeated, and then dissolved into a chorus of dreamy giggles. ( _He's smart AND hot!_ )

Lily bristled a little, staring hard down at her homework and turning completely towards the window. James was hitting on Dorcas? Why on earth would he do that? What on earth was special about _Dorcas?_

Lily's eyes widened, and she clapped her hand over her mouth. She wasn't jealous, was she?

 _No, of course I'm not_ , Lily thought furiously. _I had told him myself that I wanted to 'branch out'. Why shouldn't he do the same?_

She leaned back on the pillows. _Besides, he and Dorcas would make a good couple._

"Oh, God, Lily, have you been here the entire time?" Dorcas looked at her in horror.

Lily chewed on her bottom lip. "Yeah."

"Oh, I'm sorry—"

"You don't have to be sorry," Lily interrupted. "I'm glad, honestly. He won't be bothering me anymore."

The girls glanced at each other.

"What?" Lily said hotly. "Don't any of you have anything better to do than fantasize over James Potter?" Annoyed, she picked up her things and hurried out the door. It was quieter in the library, anyway.

* * *

Remus Lupin had just barreled into the Boys Dormitory, where Peter, James, and Sirius were enchanting mistletoe to sing _Santa Baby_ , which they would hang in the Slytherin dungeons, turning everyone that passed underneath it into old men (with full white beards that _Dumbledore_ would be jealous of) wearing red and white striped bikinis.

The Marauders at their finest, ladies and gentlemen.

"I'VE GOT IT!" Remus yelled. "I'VE GOT AN IDEA!" He had an insane glint in his eye.

Sirius had screamed and fallen off the bed, straight on top of the mistletoe, which had begun screaming _Santa Baby_ at the top of its lungs.

"What?" James scrambled up from the floor in excitement. "Idea about what?"

Remus pointed his wand at the mistletoe and muttered, " _Muffliato_." He turned back to James, face shining. "About that map. The Marauders Map."

"So what's the idea?" Sirius asked, getting up from the floor and brushing off his pants.

Remus was carrying a variety of rolled up parchment. He dropped them on the table, hunching over it in excitement. He spread one open.

"Look," he said, pointing at his intricate notes. "The _Bird's Eye-View_ Potion, with a hint of the _Clear Vision_ Potion, thrown in with a _Sixth Sense_ Potion, and we throw in a couple of our own hairs for the full effect—" Remus threw open his hands, a strange gleam in his eye. "And we've got ourselves a map, mates."

Before waiting for his dumbfounded friends to speak, Remus hunched over his parchments again; opening three others, muttering to himself. "Of course, nothing is set in stone." he said, almost to himself. "And we'd have to enchant the parchment, I have the entire map of Hogwarts drawn out already, and add our own essences to the actual thing to further increase its strength, but—"

He turned to Sirius, James, and Peter. "Of course, none of this could work. Actually, it probably won't work at all. I know for a fact that if we mix the phoenix ashes from the _Bird's Eye-View_ Potion and the sphinx tears from the _Clear Vision_ Potion, the effects could be silent and disastrous."

Silence.

"When you say add essences," Peter said slowly. "Do you mean _piss_ on the map?"

James smacked him in the back of the head. "No! You dolt." He glanced at Remus. "Right?"

Remus smacked James in the back of the head, scowling. "Of course not! Essence magic is the magic you used to create your Animagi, don't you remember?"

"No," Sirius said stupidly.

Remus sighed loudly, massaging his temples. "Anyway, I've got a head start." Wanly, he rubbed his face. "I just have to figure out how it's going to work."

"I've got an idea," James put in brightly. "Snape."

"Snivellus?" Sirius repeated in confusion. "He's not going to help us."

"No, he's not," James conceded. "But he's frighteningly good at Potions. If we steal his Potions book, I'm sure we can figure out what to do."

"That's almost cruel, Prongs," Peter said, frowning. "He's obsessed with that book. Guards it like his life."

"He probably uses it as a half-time diary," Sirius snorted. "I agree with Prongs. Let's steal the book!"

They looked at Remus hopefully, who stared at them with a very tired sort of expression on his face.

"I don't want this to become an excuse to be annoying towards Snape." Remus began, frowning sternly.

"We know," they said together.

They looked at him hopefully.

"Please?" Sirius put in, wearing his best puppy-dog expression. (He already had the dog part down.)

"Is that the _last_ option?" Remus asked, who already knew the answer.

"Yes," they chorused eagerly.

"So there's no other way," Remus concluded, almost to himself.

"Yup," they said happily.

Remus sighed again. He was doing a lot of sighing lately. "Alright, fine, we'll steal the book. Not for long, just enough time to make sure my calculations are correct."

The other three-fourths of the Marauders cheered.

Peter clapped Remus on the shoulder as they were going to bed. "So how was the date with darling McKinnon?" he asked, waggling his eyebrows. James was in the midst of hitting Sirius with a pillow.

Remus sighed for the _millionth_ time. "Fine." he said shortly. James and Sirius seemed to catch on to Remus' gloomy tone, and suddenly James was holding a bottle of alcohol, and Sirius four glasses.

"What's up, Moony?" James asked, flinging himself onto Remus' bed. "Trouble in paradise?"

"No," Remus said quietly. "No trouble. Not much _anything_." He lay down, facing away from his friends.

There was a silence, except for James pouring the alcohol into glasses.

"Love sucks," Peter announced. "Let's make a pact: When we bust out of this place, we're going to forget about settling down and live every day like it's our last. Together."

"Cheers to _that_ ," Sirius said, grinning, and slammed his glass into James'.

If only they knew.

* * *

 **A/N: I'm having a wee bit of writer's block :/ which is why I haven't been updating lately. I have to keep writing something every day so I can keep myself interested as well as my audience. I'm not very happy with this chapter, but it's the best I can do. *hands you cookies* Please take these as a token of my apologies.**

 **Also, have you guys seen Moana yet? It's goddamn amazing. The soundtrack is unbelievable. Lin-Manuel Miranda, you've done it again.**

 **I haven't seen Fantastic Beasts yet, which is _extremely_ depressing. I _really_ want to see it. Like _really._ Everybody's been saying it was amazing.**

 **Review?**


	20. Sniggering

_Chapter 19_

Potions class had just ended. Severus Snape was standing up and putting his books in his bag; silent amongst the chatter of everyone else.

"Hey, Snivvy."

Severus looked up. It was Sirius Black, coolly leaning against a desk and looking at him with a strange glint in his eye.

Severus' hand clenched on his wand. The sight of Black made a dark feeling rise up in his chest.

"Can I help you, _Black?_ " he said, pressing as much loathing as possible into Black's name.

"Probably not," Black replied, not missing a beat. "Was hoping you'd put a good word in for me when you meet my family at some Death Eater meeting, but then I remembered that not even the Dark Side would spare you a second glance."

"Fuck off," Severus snarled. His knuckles were white.

"Struck a chord there, Snape?" Black was grinning maniacally. "Finally come to realize it yourself, huh?"

"Where are your friends?" Severus snapped. "I've got a hex I've been _dying_ to try on Potter."

"Probably snogging Lily Evans," Black responded easily. His eyes were bright and face flushed.

Severus saw red. All of a sudden, he wanted to rip Potter's disgustingly Gryffindor face off his equally disgusting Gryffindor neck.

"On second thought," he said calmly. "I should try it on you first."

Black had barely a second to dodge the attack. A vial of snake scales exploded where his head had been.

"Mr. Snape, Mr. Black!" Slughorn came toddling towards them as quickly as he could. "Please, no fighting! Wand _away,_ Mr. Snape."

Seething with anger, Severus stuffed his wand into his back pocket. "Sorry, Professor." he said through gritted teeth.

"Goodness me, I might have to take off points," Slughorn sighed sadly. "Maybe fifteen points from Slytherin should suffice." He wagged a stern finger at Black, who was smirking. "Wipe that smarmy grin off your face, you insolent child. Ten points from Gryffindor."

"I didn't even curse him!"

"You provoked him." Slughorn sniffed importantly. "It's your own fault."

He made a shooing motion with his hands. "Off you go, children. The bell rang two minutes ago! If you're not careful, you're going to be late. And _I_ wouldn't enjoy getting caught by Filch in the hallways."

He hummed happily to himself, turning back to his desk to nurse a good cup of mead.

Severus grabbed his bag, angrily storming out of the classroom, not noticing that his favorite Potions book had disappeared.

* * *

"Did you get it?" Sirius whispered excitedly. He and James were hidden beneath the Cloak, skipping Astronomy.

" _Obviously_ ," James droned dramatically, a perfect imitation of Severus on his most pretentious days. They sniggered immaturely.

"Did you like that bit about Lily?" Sirius asked, smirking.

" _Obviously_ ," James repeated. He frowned a little. "Wonder why Snivvy got so hot and bothered."

"Oh, he's got a thing for Lily," Sirius explained breezily. "Regulus complains about it all the time."

"A thing for Lily?" James whispered in horror. "God, I'm going to throw up!"

"What the fuck? No!" Sirius scrambled away from him.

"Do you think Lily has a thing for _him?_ " James whispered, face white.

Sirius punched him in the arm. "The only woman who loves Severus Snape is probably his _mother_."

They sniggered again.

"Yeah, but Lily and Snape were friends once," James put in nervously. "Do you think that's why she doesn't want to fuck me?"

"Lily doesn't _fuck_ people, mate," Sirius attempted to be comforting. "She's a classy woman."

"Ah," James said in understanding. "She only makes love."

Sirius slapped James in the back of the head. " _No_ , you idiot! I mean that she won't just get into bed with any guy who looks twice at her."

"I've looked at her a lot!"

Sirius rubbed his face. "Why don't you focus on dating her before getting her into bed?"

"Oh, right, right," James said, nodding in understanding. "Anyway, we got the book!"

"Remus will be _ecstatic_ ," Sirius added cheerily.

Both looking very proud of themselves, they headed back to the Dorms to have a smoke.

* * *

"You _fought_ with him?" Remus yelled.

" _No,_ Moony," Sirius sighed patiently, as he described the scene to his obviously less intelligent friend. "I only _provoked_ him. _He_ shot at _me_."

Remus' eye was twitching. "I have no idea why I put up with you."

"Oh, get over it," James said. "We got the book, _Dad_." Sirius and him high-fived while sniggering simultaneously. They were on a sniggering phase of their lives.

"Fools," Peter muttered to Remus, who's eye was still twitching.

"Is your eye okay?" Sirius asked cautiously, after a few concerning moments. "You might need to get that checked out."

"Refrain me from murdering them," Remus told Peter, who shrugged.

Remus rubbed his temples. "Well, give me the book, then," he said, almost in defeat, and stretched out his hand. Sirius dropped the book in his palm.

"Did you read it?" Remus asked, flipping the book open and skimming over the pages in fascination. "He really is brilliant, you know."

"Come off it, Remus, he just likes Potions," James said, rolling his eyes. "He's probably an old hag in disguise."

"Probably not even _in_ disguise," Sirius said wickedly, and the two started sniggering again.

"Oh, shut up," Peter said, frowning at them. He looked at Remus. "Found anything of value?"

Remus was scanning Snape's notes on the different potions he had described to make the Marauder's Map. "Yes," he said, as if agreeing with him. "Yes, this is brilliant! And the calculations are absolutely perfect. This could actually work!" He snapped the book closed. "I'll need this for a couple of days." he told his friends, grimacing. "Hopefully Snape doesn't commit suicide or something." He sniffed. "Why does this entire place smell of smoke?"

"It's called _weed_ , Remus, you won't find it in Herbology," Sirius snickered, glancing at James, who smirked at Remus, swiveling on his chair.

"One day," Peter prophesized. "McGonagall will cut out your throats, and you will die terrible deaths."

"Or they'll overdose and do something stupid, _then_ die," Remus suggested, hunting through his trunk to find a spare piece of parchment to go with Snape's notes.

"Lily probably doesn't like drugs, mate," Peter warned James, who frowned at him.

"That reminds me," Remus said, triumphantly pulling out a piece of parchment and a quill. "Did you ask out Dorcas?"

The other three Marauders stared at their feet.

"Um," said James. "Not exactly."

Remus frowned. "Why not?"

" _Because_ Moony," James replied.

"Because _what_?" Remus demanded sternly.

"Because we don't _know_ each other at _all_ ," James complained. "She'd totally turn me down! Anyway, I figured we could become friends and _then_ I'd ask her out."

Remus was silent for a moment. The less intelligent three-fourths of the Marauders waited for his verdict.

"That," Remus began slowly. "is rather clever of you. Bravo, James, never would've expected it."

James mimed bowing. Sirius threw pretend roses at him.

"Alright, alright, that's enough," Remus said grumpily. "Now, all of you get out so I can figure some shit out."

* * *

It was seventh period when Severus realized his Potions book was gone.

Immediately, he felt vulnerable. He _never_ lost his Potions book.

He ran through the various events of the day. What could've happened? Where could it have gone? Not far, he assumed.

What if somebody had found it? What if someone was uncovering every secret he'd ever written? As if they were pulling apart his skin and studying the contents underneath.

Severus shivered. He suddenly felt starkly naked.

" _Who_ would take my Potions book?" he whispered almost desperately to himself, as he was jostled side to side by the students around him.

He could think of only four people. _Black_ , he realized. _Black fought with me. One of the others must've stolen it._

He didn't know how, but he could think of nothing else.

"You lost, Snivelly?" Sirius called from the opposite side of the hall. He couldn't resist.

Snape looked up, seeming slightly surprised to see him. "Are you?"

Sirius snorted, pushing off the wall. "What kind of comeback is that?"

"I'm not lost," Snape replied tightly. He seemed like he was _studying_ Sirius; which unnerved him.

"Really?" Sirius pushed, annoyed that he was getting nervous around Snivellus. "You look like you're... _missing something_." He smiled innocently.

An expression like _victory_ flashed across Snape's face. "You stole it."

"Stole what?" Sirius feigned confusion, tapping his chin.

"Give it back." Snape demanded. He looked ready to duel. "Give it back to me right now."

"I didn't steal anything," Sirius said, pretending to hide something behind his back. There was a crowd around them now.

"You ass!" Snape suddenly burst out. "Why would you steal my book?"

" _Oh_. It was a book, was it? Maybe you should go check the library for a fresh copy," Sirius suggested, smirking.

"Merlin's beard, I'll kill you," Snape hissed.

"Whoa there, Mr. Sweetheart," Sirius laughed like a king. "Violence isn't always the answer."

"It is with you," Snape replied, pointing his wand straight at him. "Give it back on the count of three."

"The fuck? I _don't_ _have it_ ," Sirius said slowly, as if Snape was stupid.

"I can cut you open like I did to Lupin," Snape hissed, a strange smile on his face. "Or would like me to break your ribs? I did that to him too."

The smile was wiped straight off of Sirius' face.

"Not laughing anymore, are you, Black?" Snape's strange smile widened. "Somebody needs to teach you a lesson, and it's going to be me."

"How dare you threaten me," Sirius murmured. His eyes were black in the low light. Anger coursed through his veins like fire. "How dare you threaten me after committing such a vile, disgusting crime towards Remus?"

"Righteousness doesn't suit you, Black," Snape said, raising an eyebrow.

"You don't know when to shut up," Sirius snarled. "I think _you_ need to get taught a lesson _._ "

Snape smiled. His teeth were a brilliant white. "Bite me."

He threw himself out of the way of a curse that was bright red.

"Don't run, Snivelly!" Sirius shouted, blasting another curse towards him. Snape deflected it.

"Same to you!" Snape shouted back, and a hurricane of shadow enveloped Sirius. Several students screamed. The escaped light reflected off of Snape's face.

Sirius was lost in the blackness. It was choking him; pulling at his mind the way surgeons pull at your skin. He struggled for breath, finally grabbing his wand and blasting at the walls around him.

And then there was light.

Sirius hit the floor, gasping. Snape looked surprised to see him.

Sirius blasted him backwards. Snape smashed into the opposite wall.

"That," Sirius panted. "was for Remus."

Snape got up, face shining with sweat. A little blood dribbled down from a cut on his forehead. "I don't think Lupin wants you to fight his battles."

Sirius slashed his wand, and a cut appeared on Snape's cheek. Snape flicked his wand in retaliation, and Sirius toppled to the floor, gripping his leg in pain.

"He's— noble," he gasped out, sweat shimmering on his brow.

"Such loyalty," Snape said, smirking a little. He pointed his wand at Sirius, and he was brought into the air, clawing at an invisible hand at his throat.

"He—can—fight—you," Sirius whispered hoarsely. Snape flicked his wand once more, and Sirius dropped down the ground, where he lay, not moving. The crowd around them began to whisper nervously.

A collective sigh of relief rippled across the people when Sirius pushed off the ground, wobbling. He lay on his knees, face cut and bruised all over.

The moonlight shone over him, turning his blood silver. Sirius looked at it as if he had had a revelation.

With hatred clogging up his veins and throat, he croaked, "Next week. Through the Whomping Willow."

"Through it?" Snape asked, arching a brow, not even slightly concerned with Sirius' condition.

Sirius smirked through the pain. "He can hold his own."

Snape eyed him suspiciously, then shook his head once. "Sleep tight, Black." he said, and everything went dark.

* * *

 **A/N: Why do my fight scenes suck, you ask? Because they do, okay? I'm sorry for my failures.**

 **Also, I hate when I've loved an artist for really long, since the time when only their _Moms_ knew about them, (not even their Dads) and suddenly, like a million years later, everybody is screaming about how much they love them. Like, screw you. _Screw you_.**

 **-end rant-**

 **Review?**


	21. Bad Decisions

_Chapter 20_

Sirius was lying in the Hospital Wing. There was too much sunlight.

He blinked his eyes opened, and immediately wished he hadn't. Groaning, he turned over on his face.

His left leg and both his arms were heavily bandaged and being treated with external potions. There were bandages on his face as well. Generally, he felt like shit.

"Black? Are you awake?"

 _Fangirls? No, they'd call him 'Sirius' not 'Black'. Maybe even 'honey-bear-sweet-darling'._

" _Black_."

He turned over again, putting his arm over his face to shield himself from the sunlight. He heard the person that had been talking to him walk over to the curtains and pull them shut.

Warily, he removed his arm. The Hospital Wing suddenly seemed much more hushed and private.

His eyes eventually found themselves staring at Marlene McKinnon's face.

"Oh," he said pleasantly. "Fancy seeing you here, McKinnon."

Marlene didn't smile. In fact, she looked terrible. Her hair was a mess, there were tremendous dark circles under her eyes, and she was trembling.

Her shaking hands were folded primly in her lap. She sat on the opposite cot like it might break from her weight.

"How are you?" she asked slowly.

Sirius turned over on his side to fully see her. He propped his elbow up and rested his chin on his fist. "Quite well, actually. You?"

"You've been asleep for three days." Marlene was in her no-bullshit voice. She did not seem in the mood for lighthearted laughter or jokes. (Sirius was _always_ in the mood for those.)

"You're joking," Sirius said, actually surprised. "You're joking, aren't you?"

"I'm not joking."

Sirius believed her. She looked like she had risen from the dead. The dead weren't keen on joking.

"Well, damn." Sirius said. "I've successfully missed three days of classes without McGonagall up my ass with a detention. Have I mentioned how fine that woman truly is?" He turned back to grin at Marlene, but she was still staring at him like he had killed her mother.

Sirius gave a long sigh. "What's wrong, McKinnon? Why are you visiting me in the Hospital Wing, anyway?"

Marlene didn't answer for a long moment. She was chewing on her lip. "Your friends," she said instead. "have been visiting you daily."

"I didn't ask about my friends, though that's nice of them," Sirius said. "Why the hell would they do that? I was just asleep."

"Madam Pomfrey said you could've died." Marlene said, as if she'd been waiting to burst that out that entire time. As if it had been clogging up her throat.

Sirius was quiet in thought for a moment. Then: "Killed by Snape? No, no, no. Not the way to go at _all_ ," he said finally, in slight disappointment. "Nice to know I can't fend off a slimy, overgrown bat without my friends. God, where has my dignity run off to? Have you seen it lately, McKinn—"

"Will you _stop_ making jokes for one second?" Marlene shouted.

Sirius shut up and stared at her.

"I've been here every day since the accident." Marlene whispered. "To see if you were awake. I even talked to you, sometimes, but you never even looked at me. They say that people wake when they hear the person they love."

Sirius glanced away from her. "We're not in love, Marlene." he said uncomfortably. A strange knot of anxiety and fear was curling up in his chest.

"Maybe _you're_ not in love," Marlene burst out. "but I-I at least _like_ you! Sure, we're not in love! Then _why_ am I thinking about you when I'm sitting across a coffee shop table with Remus Lupin, my boyfriend?"

Sirius stared at the opposite wall. He wished Marlene would open the curtains. It was suddenly dark and sad and horrible in the Hospital Wing, and he realized that he was parched for sunlight.

"See?" Marlene said, almost in desperation. "You won't even look at me."

Sirius turned and looked at her straight in the eye. "I _am_ looking at you, McKinnon." _I'm always looking at you, McKinnon._

Marlene's eyes were hazel. Green and blue and brown, all the eye colors mixed into one— as if even her eyes knew that she was everything to him.

"Marlene," she whispered. "My name is Marlene." The warmth of her breath fanned across his left cheek. She was so close to him.

"Star of the sea," he murmured. He brushed his hand across her cheek, tenderly and sweetly, against the back of her head, and pulled her close to him, forehead just brushing across forehead. His eyes were fluttering shut.

"Don't kiss me," Marlene whispered into his lips.

Disappointment billowed up in his chest, and he let go of her, glaring at her with hooded eyes. "You're a tease, McKinnon."

"No, I'm— trying to be a better girlfriend," Marlene said lamely. There was splotches of red on each of her cheeks, her eyes were bright, and she was breathing heavily.

"And yet," Sirius fired back. "you come here and tell me how much you'd _like_ to kiss me."

"I didn't say I wanted to kiss you!" Marlene said in indignation. "I came here so I could figure out my feelings about you!"

"You shouldn't have any feelings at all for me!"

Marlene grabbed his collar. "Tell me to my face that you don't have feelings for me."

Her lips were so inviting. "Your eyes are so pretty," Sirius muttered instead. "God, you're hypnotizing me, aren't you? Crazy woman."

"I'm not hypnotizing you, idiot," Marlene snarled. "Why don't you ever give me a straight answer?"

Sirius grabbed her face and kissed her straight on the mouth.

"There," he panted. "There's your answer, you demanding, confusing, annoyingly gorgeous bitch."

"Don't call me a bitch!" She punched him in the arm. "And don't kiss me!"

He grabbed her face and kissed her again. "HA!"

She punched him in the arm, much, _much_ harder. "You bastard!"

"OW!" Sirius shouted, and glared at her. "Fine! You want me to spill my feelings? Well, here they are. _I like you_. Happy?"

She punched him in the arm. "Now I'm _twice_ as confused!"

"Will you _stop_ hitting me, woman!" Sirius yelled, and then Marlene grabbed his shirt and kissed him.

" _Mmmm_ ," Sirius murmured, when they pulled apart. "You taste like chocolate, Marlene McKinnon. Have you been eating my get-well wishes?" He gestured at the table beside him, strewn with empty candy wrappers. His eyes were hooded in satisfaction.

"Girls eat chocolate when they're sad," Marlene breathed, eyes continually fluttering back to his mouth. "It's a known fact."

"Yeah, well, don't eat _mine_ ," he muttered back, and couldn't resist the urge to press his lips to hers again. She was addicting; bitter and sweet and sour and everything he'd ever expected.

She was smiling against his mouth, and bit down on his lower lip. He grinned, wrapping an arm around her waist, kissing her deeply.

And then she had rolled into his cot, and he had rolled on top of her, injuries forgotten. She giggled when he pretended to bite her earlobe. (Marlene was _not_ a giggler.)

"Wait," he whispered into her hair. "We're not _really_ going to have sex in the _Hospital Wing_ , are we?"

She went rigid. Then she shoved him off her, getting off the cot like it was on fire. She straightened her rumpled clothing and attempted to fix her hair.

Sirius blinked. "So that's a no?"

"NO!" she screamed suddenly. "No, no, no, no. I can't. We can't have sex at all. No, no, no. Remus, oh, poor Remus—" She seemed to be having a panic attack.

"Calm down," Sirius said, sitting up and swinging his legs off the side of the cot. "Calm _down_ , Marlene."

And then she threw herself at his chest and wrapped her arms around him.

Shocked, Sirius rubbed her back. "It's alright," he found himself saying, in what seemed to be a comforting voice. "I'm sorry. That was my fault."

"No, it wasn't," Marlene said, pulling away. She was looking at him very sincerely. "It was my fault too. I have to tell Remus. I have to break up with him."

All at once, panic set in. "What? No."

"What?" Marlene said, looking at him like he was crazy. "Of course, we have to. It's the right thing to do. We'll do it together. He'll understand, he's _Remus_."

"No, we can't," Sirius hissed. "Don't you understand? He'll hate me, he'll hate me forever."

"What, you'd rather live in guilt?" Marlene hissed back. "Not me. That's not who I am."

"Remus _can't_ know!" Sirius said in a crazed whisper, though there was nobody else there. "Promise me that you won't tell him."

"I have to tell him," she said, shaking her head. "Sirius, please." She brought a trembling hand to his cheek.

"Time," he murmured, gripping her hand. "Just a little time."

She looked at him sadly.

"Fuck, I'm selfish," he said, and grabbed her by the waist, pressing his lips to hers.

When he pulled away, her mouth was bruised and swollen. "Remus—" she breathed, and he pressed a finger across her lips.

"He doesn't have to know."

* * *

"Mr. Severus Snape," said a low, warm voice.

Severus was gripping the armrests of the chair like he'd die if he let go. "Sir?"

Professor Dumbledore emerged from the inner portion of his office. He gave him a very kindly smile. "Hello, Severus."

"Hello," Severus responded tightly. He made sure his voice did not betray the fear he truly felt. Would Dumbledore expel him?

Dumbledore sat in his great chair and looked deeply at Severus. His eyes were so blue, so piercing. Sometimes Severus thought Dumbledore could read minds.

"Severus, what are you doing?" Dumbledore finally asked. His voice was tired.

He didn't answer for a moment. "Surviving," he replied finally, still taut as a spring.

Dumbledore was looking down at his desk. He was quiet for a moment. "Have a lemon drop." he said finally, and opened a glass candy box. "Go on."

Warily, Severus took one. He didn't unwrap it.

"It's not poisoned, or Potion-ed," Dumbledore, sliding the candy jar back underneath his desk. "Really." He held up his own lemon drop and popped it into his mouth.

Severus put the lemon drop into his mouth. It tasted sweet and sour; but had a strange, indecipherable flavor of sadness to it.

Dumbledore was watching him intently. Severus wanted to sob or fall to his knees and blast Potter and his cronies into a wall. He balled his fists.

"You said you hadn't tampered with it."

"And I didn't," Dumbledore said, leaning backwards. "It's a Muggle sweet. For some reason, it brings up bittersweet memories and allows sadness to become sweet again. Strange, isn't it?"

Severus gave a tight nod, and resisted spitting out the candy. "I hate it."

"It is not wise to hate memories that are sad, Severus." Dumbledore said. "In fact, it is better to embrace them, to love them. Sadness is beautiful, Severus."

Severus wanted to punch him in his old, wise, conniving face. "Why am I here, Sir?" he asked through gritted teeth, though he knew.

"For attacking Sirius Black, of course," Dumbledore replied, leaning backwards. "I will not pretend that I understand why you are so angry, because I do not know. All these angry feelings, these sad, dark thoughts— where do they stem from?"

Severus' heart was twisted into a tight knot. "I don't know, Sir." he lied.

Dumbledore studied him. "I will not pry. I want you to know that anything, even the smallest things that make you sad or angry, I am willing to listen to it all. Is that fair?"

"Yes, Sir." Severus said, though he was making a mental note to run like hell in the opposite direction if Dumbledore ever crossed him in the halls.

"Good." Dumbledore said, nodding in satisfaction. "Then you are free to go."

Severus was momentarily shocked. "You're not expelling me, Sir?"

Dumbledore sighed. "No, Severus, I am not. I don't expel students lightly."

"Yes, yes, thank you," Severus said, but he was already half-way out the door.

Before he left, he spat the lemon drop to the floor and crushed it with his foot.

* * *

Severus' father. His stupid, horrible, Muggle father— It was _him_ Severus dreamed of. And when he woke, he was shivering and feverish, and Narcissa Black glanced at him in concern from Lucius Malfoy's bed.

"It was nothing," Severus rasped, sitting up in bed and shaking his head once at Narcissa. She wore nothing but her thin, revealing silver nightgown. Lucius was, thankfully, fast asleep. His blond head of hair shimmered under the silvery moonlight.

"Sev—" she muttered, getting up to go to him, but he held up a hand.

"I'd rather not suffer your boyfriend's wrath," Severus muttered coldly. "Go back to bed. It's late."

Narcissa looked desperately at him. "There are other ways— I can help you feel better—" She stood up again, the covers falling away to reveal her pale, long legs.

A tight feeling seized up Severus' stomach. "No." he said, turning away from her vision. "Not that. I said to go to _bed_ , Narcissa."

Narcissa frowned at him, hurt etched over her pretty, angelic features. "Fine." she breathed haughtily. "I offered. Most only dream of having me."

Severus snorted. "If that's what you tell yourself to sleep at night." he responded, and turned away from her, facing towards his window.

A pecking came at his window, and he opened it. A large black owl swooped in, black eyes strangely bright.

Severus untied the letter from its foot, and opened it.

 _Severus Snape,_

 _We are in the forest. Come find us if you dare_.

* * *

 **A/N: A sexier chapter for you! Sirius is being more of an asshole than usual. Poor Remus :'(**

 **I couldn't think of what to name this chap at all. However, I do believe I'm getting back into the groove of this story! (Which means more frequent updates.) (Goddamn, I probably just jinxed it.)**

 **Review?**


	22. Savior

_Chapter 21_

"Full moon tonight," Remus pointed out awkwardly. There was a strange silence in the Common Room that day. The Marauders weren't usually silent.

Sirius was the only one who glanced up. "Tonight? Really?"

"Yeah," Remus replied. "I feel it." Werewolves tended to sense the changes. He just seemed to _know_.

Sirius was writing to his aunt, Andromeda. Her daughter's birthday party was to be during Christmas break, and she had no one else to invite but him. (Which included his three best friends.) (They were a package deal.)

"We're all going to the party, yeah?" Sirius asked, and everyone nodded. He penned everyone's name down.

Silence.

"What's wrong with you all?" Remus asked suddenly, frowning. "What's up? Has something bad happened?"

Nobody spoke for a moment.

"They've been attacked." James said suddenly, quietly. It was not in James' nature to be quiet. "My parents."

"What?" Apparently no one had known about this, though James' strange silence had been eating at them all.

"I mean, not _them_. They're alright. But where they live. They live in a Muggle area, as you may know."

"Mr. and Mrs. Potter?" Sirius repeated. "When? How? Was it Voldemort?"

James winced. "Don't say his name."

"So it was him, then? Vol-er, um, _You-Know-Who?_ " Remus asked, glancing at his friends. James nodded.

Peter was twisting his hands together in worry. "Damn."

"We joined that group," James said suddenly, vehemently. "Why aren't we _doing_ anything?"

"We're in school, James," Sirius sighed. He looked immensely tired, and had dark circles under his eyes.

"My parents are getting attacked, Snape sends Padfoot to the Hospital Wing, and _nobody fucking cares_ ," James hissed angrily. "I don't fucking _care_ about the five different uses of the Tentacula. I want to make sure everyone I care about is _safe_."

He threw his papers to the ground and stormed out of the Dormitory. The door slammed after him.

"That went well." Peter said dryly.

* * *

As James always did when he was upset or stressed, he went to the Astronomy Tower.

When he got there, he half expected Lily Evans to be there as well, but the entire place was empty and silent.

James went over to the edge and sat on the railing, allowing his legs to dangle over the edge. He sighed, anger cooling over into a sort of quiet sadness.

He was in a permanent place of unrest, of turmoil and confusion. He was in Seventh Year. He needed to know what he was going to do with his life, but he didn't have a clue.

There was a paper in his bag that was innocently asking him three questions: _1\. Where would you like to live when you graduate from Hogwarts?_

Even the first one was hard. James rubbed his temples. He just wanted to stay at _Hogwarts_ , dammit.

 _2\. What are your strengths?_

Quidditch, probably? His parents would kill him even if he only _proposed_ the idea of joining a Quidditch team.

 _3\. What are you interested in?_

At least _that_ one was easy. He was interested in Lily Evans.

(Even if she wasn't interested in him.)

* * *

"We're having partners, today, class!" Slughorn said happily, clapping his hands together. "Miss McKinnon, you're with Mr. Black. Mr. Potter, you are with Miss Meadowes. Miss Evans..."

James got up and headed over to Dorcas, who smiled shyly at him. She looked extra pretty today. James smiled tentatively back.

"Hi," Dorcas said. "Here, I have my book out already. We can just use that."  
"Sure," James replied, and glanced at the board, checking for the page number. He flipped open his book, accidentally knocking his quill off the desk and onto the floor.

He knelt to pick it up, but someone had already gotten it. "Here," Lily whispered softly. She was looking at him in a very strange way. James tried to decipher her expression. He frowned. She almost looked... hurt?

He gave her his usual lopsided smile. "Thanks." She didn't smile back. Instead, she ducked her head and returned to work with Remus, who she was paired with.

James attempted to look at her face. What had got _her_ all sad? _He_ was the one who should've been sad. She had gone on a date with that asshole Winston, hadn't she?

As Dorcas went to fetch the ingredients from the Students Cupboard, James sidled up to Lily, as she was cutting the lotus petals meant for their potion.

"What's got you so messed up?" James asked in a low voice, as he set a fire beneath his cauldron. The water began to boil.

James noticed the clench of Lily's jaw. A curl escaped her ponytail, and her dicing became slightly more violent.

"Nothing," she said tightly.

He flicked the rogue curl. "Not nothing."

She turned to him suddenly, and glared at him. Her green eyes were terrifyingly piercing. She looked more angry, more hurt, more _furious_ than he had ever seen her. "Potter, don't you have work to do? I'm not interested in you ruining my perfect average."

Green eyes, such green, green eyes. James backed up, holding up his hands in surrender. "Goddamn. I was just asking." he said, and turned back to his cauldron, frowning a little.

Dorcas reappeared, eyes sparkling. She touched his arm. "Here." she said, and handed him the ingredients used for their potion. "You're cutting those wrong," she said kindly, and guided his arm the correct way.

He glanced over at Lily, just out of spite, and found her glaring daggers at Dorcas' hand on his arm.

And about a million light bulbs turned on in James' brain. Despite himself, he grinned widely.

"Thanks," he said, smiling at Dorcas, who blushed. "You're probably one of the best partners I've had all year in Potions." He saw Lily's fingers twitch out of the corner of his eye.

Dorcas' blush reddened, and she giggled.

As James laughed and slung a flirtatious arm around Dorcas' shoulders, he noticed Lily's clenched, white, fists, and Remus worriedly asking if she was alright. He smiled secretively to himself.

Lily's eyes were green with jealousy.

* * *

Remus was shivering. It was freezing outside, but the moonlight was hot on the back of his neck.

Taking a deep breath, he hurried up to the Whomping Willow, pressed his hand on the special knot that allowed him entrance, and disappeared within its branches.

Just another night that he couldn't escape. Just another night he could drown in.

A sharp pain pulled at his throat, and a strangled sound burst out from behind his clenched teeth.

He fell to the floor, breathing hard. It had already begun.

* * *

Severus Snape never forgot promises. He had concealed himself with a difficult spell he had come up with. He hadn't found his book yet, but he remembered his favorite spells, his favorite Potions tricks.

He seemed to disappear into the blackness of night, the light from the full moon illuminating the inviting branches of the Forbidden Forest. He padded silently through the snow.

The letter he had received from the Death Eaters resided in his back pocket. He'd keep reaching back for it, to make sure it was really there.

His wand was in his left hand, itching for blood. Remus Lupin was the only answer.

Of course, he wouldn't launch a surprise attack on him. He didn't believe in that kind of dueling. Severus was a polite boy, no matter what anyone else thought. He wanted it to be fair. If there was anything Severus Snape believed in, it was fairness.

Severus Snape didn't particularly dislike Remus Lupin at all. But his thirst for revenge and the desperate plea to prove himself— he was going to take down each of the Marauders. Black had begun the streak, and he was hoping Potter would end it.

He pulled his cloak closer around him, the foreboding spindly fingers of the Whomping Willow swaying eerily in the blackness. What had Black said? _Through_ the tree?

He frowned. How was he going to do that? Pulling out his wand, he pointed it at the tree, whispering stunning spells and freezing spells. None worked.

He grit his teeth. Well, then he'd just have to do it the hard way.

Readying himself, he sprinted straight towards the trunk of the tree. The branches themselves seemed to scream with anger. They whipped at his clothing, scratched his face.

Severus scrambled towards the trunk and pressed his hand against it, unknowingly activating the tree itself. A hole opened, and without thinking twice, he threw himself inside.

Panting, he sat up. He seemed to be in a house of some sorts— though everything was made of wood.

"Remarkable," he said in fascination, despite himself. Had the Marauders really created this?

A scream sounded from downstairs. Severus jumped, his wand out in a flash.

"What the hell?" he rasped, his heart beating erratically. Was this a trap?

Whatever you may think of Severus Snape, he is not a bad person. And this was why he began to creep down the stairs, his wand trembling between his fingers. He would not desert anyone who was in need. And the person who screamed seemed to be in need.

The stairs creaked. He hated creaking stairs.

Every shadow made his skin crawl. He wished with all his heart he hadn't been so stupid to just satisfy his revenge-filled mind.

The light was dim downstairs, as if only lit by a single torch. The shadows of the flame flickered on the walls.

And then everything went dark.

Severus felt his heart plummet to the soles of his shoes. _Now_ what was he going to do?

Another choked sob came from a different direction. The voice almost sounded familiar, which worried him.

" _Lumos_ ," Severus whispered, against his will. The tip of his wand began to glow with a warm, familiar light. It gave him courage to inch forward.

The light from his wand illuminated the wooden wall beside him. Severus peered closer, and to his horror, saw deep claw marks and what looked like bloodstains. Some were fresh.

He shone the light towards the floor. The bloodstains led to a hallway, that looked eerie and foreboding in the low light of his wand.

Gathering his courage, Severus followed the trail of blood, until he reached what looked like a living room.

Or what _was_ a living room. The sofas and armchairs were torn apart. The stuffing lay on the floor. A thick layer of dust covered the tables and the mantel above the fireplace. It was eerily cold.

Severus' heart nearly stopped when he heard the sound of labored breathing.

He swallowed. His throat was dry. "Hello?" he said softly. "Is there anybody here?"

"No," There was a choked, terrified, painful sound. "No, please leave! Get out! _Get out!_ "

"Who are you? Where are you?" Severus demanded, shining his light around the room. He could not detect any sign of a person.

A terrible and guttural scream came from the opposite side of the room, followed by a heavy thud.

Severus forgot his fear and hurried over. "Do you need help?" He shined his light towards the hunched shadow in the blackness.

What he saw made him drop his wand and fall backwards.

Remus Lupin, clothes torn, fangs emerging from his mouth and jutting into his bottom lip. His fingers were turning into claws. His eyes were yellow and full of hatred. He did not, in the slightest, look even _remotely_ human.

"Oh, fuck," Severus said, and then ran for his life.

Lupin wasn't taking any chances. Severus could hear him bounding after him, as if on thickly padded paws. He could hear growls and snarls.

He ran faster and faster, up the stairs, blindly running into the blackness. His wand was hanging limply in his hand. It seemed, through his fear, that he had forgotten that he was a wizard. In that moment, he was too terrified to think.

 _Now he knew what Black had been talking about_.

He crashed against the door he had come in through, the entrance of the Whomping Willow. It would not budge.

He pounded frantically on the door. "Let me out!" he screamed, though he knew no one was there. " _Let me out! Help me!_ "

He could hear Lupin coming up the stairs, his paws padding against the wood. The scent of blood drifted past him in the air. He saw Lupin's wolf teeth gleaming in the moonlight shining from a window.

Severus pressed himself against the door and tried not to breathe.

And then, as Lupin's wet, fully-formed wolf nose came too close to Severus for comfort, his teeth only inches from ripping through his flesh, the door opened and Severus fell backwards. The entrance slammed shut on Lupin's howls and shrieks, half-human and half-wolf.

Severus sat on the ground, breathing hard. He was alive.

" _Get up!_ " someone was screaming. " _Get up, you idiot! He's going to kill you, don't you understand? He's going to fucking kill you!_ "

Severus shook his head and got up. He couldn't recognize the form in front of him, tripping in the darkness, dragging him through the night.

Lupin had escaped from the Whomping Willow and was bounding after them. Severus remembered reality and sprinted after his savior, unable to recognize where he was going. All he did was run, only run.

They had been sprinting through the Forbidden Forest, and they reached a clearing. Lupin emerged from the trees, a fully formed wolf, snarling, growling.

"Get out of here! I'll fend him off!" said his savior, and Severus looked at him.

It was James Potter, glasses and ego all intact, screaming at him to save his own life. Severus stared at him, dumbfounded.

Lupin lunged at Severus. Potter put up the fastest Shield Charm Severus had ever witnessed in his life, causing the werewolf to slam against it only inches from Severus' face.

" _Get out!_ " Potter yelled, and Severus didn't need to be told twice. He bolt from the clearing, not remembering the terrified, pained look in James' eye as he blast his best friend in the chest to protect his enemy.

When Severus reached Hogwarts, safe in the castle, he bent over and tried to remember how to breathe. Then he stood, shaking the snow and fear off his skin.

When he returned to bed last night, Narcissa still glancing at him in that (terribly annoying) worried way she always did, all he could think was:

 _Potter saved my life. James Potter saved my life._

* * *

James Potter, bloodied and bruised, was getting dragged through the snow by Peter Pettigrew and an enormous black dog.

They propped him up against a wall. The shaggy-haired dog turned into a shaggy-haired boy. "Mate," Sirius breathed, and then pointed his wand at his friend's face.

When James awoke from his faint, he gasped, eyes wide. "Sirius," he said, grabbing his friend's shoulders. "Sirius, Remus is alone in the forest, Snape was there and—"

"We know," Peter said, laying a worried hand on James' shoulder. "You were early. Why were you early?"

"Good thing I was early," James mused, calming down slightly. He leaned against the castle wall and tried to catch his breath. "Moony could've killed him. He probably _would've_ killed him."

"He'd deserve it," Sirius muttered under his breath.

"Why was he in there, anyway?" James shook his head in confusion. "Why the hell would he even _approach_ the Whomping Willow? That's why Remus transforms in there. Because no one in their right mind would go _in_."

Sirius shrugged, feigning confusion as well. Peter, who knew the truth, glared at his friend.

"He," Peter said, pointing an accusatory finger at Sirius, who frantically shook his head, " _challenged_ Snape _for_ Remus and told him to go into the Whomping Willow tonight. That's why."

"You fucker!" James said, frowning at his best mate.

"I couldn't resist, Prongs," Sirius said, hanging his head in shame. "He's just _such_ a loser."

"True," James said, patting his friend's shoulder sympathetically. "I understand."

"Thanks, mate."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Better get you cleaned up before McGonagall finds us and asks us what happened."

"It's alright, Pete," Sirius said. "I'll fix him up. You can go to bed. Maybe you can make a Pepper-Up Potion for Remus to have in the morning?"

"Yeah, yeah, sure," Peter said, standing up, though he was a little reluctant to leave.

"I'll be fine," James said, waving him off. "We have a Transfiguration test tomorrow morning, by the way."

But Peter was already gone.

* * *

Peter picked his way through the snow. Why was _he_ the one to go away? Sirius and Remus were always the ones who helped. _He_ wasn't necessary.

Like when they fought the wannabe Death Eaters at the Hog's Head. _He_ was the one left behind to watch over the girls. Remus hadn't even been there when they had the _conversation_. And _Remus_ was the one who got beat up.

Peter frowned up at the night sky. _He_ wouldn't have gotten beat up. Why didn't they let him come?

He kicked at a piece of ice. The wintery winds ruffled his hair, and he shivered.

The Whomping Willow was calm in the night, which was strange. Blinking away the snow in his eyelashes, Peter approached the tree. It didn't attack him.

There was a piece of paper at the bottom of the trunk. Peter picked it up, brushing off the snow and standing beneath the moonlight so he could read the large, spindly lettering.

 _Severus Snape,_

 _We are in the forest. Come find us if you dare_.

* * *

 **A/N: I feel like we're delving so deep into the characters! I'm so happy!**

 **Review?!**


	23. A Sudden Chill

_Chapter 22_

Peter stared at the note. Then read it again about three times.

Peter was no fool. He understood that the note was meant for Severus Snape. Who would write to him but Death Eaters?

The thought made him shudder. Fearfully eying the thick, foreboding trees of the Forbidden Forest, Peter turned on his heel and hurried for the castle. He was going to show James, Sirius and Remus the second they woke up the next morning—

He stopped.

"No," Peter said aloud. He frowned down at the snow below him. " _No_."

No, he wasn't going to show it to his friends. What would they do? They'd run off into the forest and leave him behind.

He crushed the note in his fist. No, now he was going to be the hero. _He_ would find the Death Eaters and be looked up to as more than just one of James's friends, or Sirius's friends, or Remus's friends.

Peter glanced up at the rising sun in the sky, stuffed the note in his back pocket, and hurried into the castle.

* * *

Lily was sitting in the Common Room, having woken up early to finish the last bit of her Charms homework. She hadn't missed an assignment all year, and she wasn't planning on starting to.

The sun was creeping up the castle walls and spilling into the windows. It turned Lily's red hair gold. Lily yawned, ran a hand through her messy hair, and snuggled into the sofa. It was nice being up so early, with only the cold winter sun for company.

The portrait creaked open. Lily could hear the Fat Lady chastising whoever was returning back to the Common Room this late. (Or was it early?)

Lily rolled her eyes. Probably some horny Fifth or Sixth Year sneaking back from a night in the Ravenclaw Dorms. Surprisingly, it wasn't.

James Potter and Sirius Black entered the Common Room stopping short when they saw her.

She stared back at them, and then only at James, who was covered with bruises and blood.

James attempted to smile at her.

And Lily realized that when she tried to breathe— she couldn't. No, she could not breathe when James Potter was bleeding out in front of her.

The parchment, ink and quills spilled from her lap and to the floor.

"What happened?" were the only words she could force out of her mouth.

James and Sirius glanced at each other. "Uh, got into a little something." James replied vaguely. "Why are you up so early?"

Lily didn't reply, just looked at him. Her lip was trembling. "Goddamn, Potter, why are you so stupid?" she asked shakily. "What have you done? Why can't you— just _stay_ somewhere and not get hurt?"

James frowned at her. It was an angry sort of frown, as if she had betrayed him and had the nerve to act like she hadn't. "Sorry, _Mom_ ," he said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "Padfoot, I'm going to bed."

"Some of those need to get checked out." Sirius said, pointing at the line of bruises up his arm.

James didn't reply, disappearing up the staircase.

Sirius and Lily looked at each other. "Where were you?" Lily asked, watching him carefully.

Sirius looked uncomfortable. "It doesn't matter now."

"Of course it matters!" Lily said hotly. "You are not only jeopardizing your _own_ safety when you—"

"Chill out, McGonagall," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. Then he sighed. "Evans, Potter just did something important, and it was all for you. That's all you need to know." With that, he turned on his heel and followed his best mate's footsteps up the stairs.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" Lily asked furiously after him, but he was gone.

* * *

Remus Lupin was alone.

He was bleeding into the grass, and it was freezing outside. His throat felt like sandpaper.

He was somewhere in the Forbidden Forest. He wasn't quite sure _where_ he was, he'd never been there before, but he registered the cold and unwelcoming chill of unfamiliar magic.

He sat up, shivering. His head spun. His clothes were torn, and he had lost his shoes. The snow crackled underneath his feet as he stood, shuddering uncontrollably. He rubbed his arms.

The sun was high in the sky, signaling a cold winter afternoon. Maybe Dumbledore would forgive him for not showing up to his morning classes.

He wondered where James and Sirius and Peter were. He didn't want to admit that he was hurt that they had left him. They had never done that before. He was afraid he had done something wrong.

The rocks beneath his feet cut into his skin, but the chill warded off the pain. The forest was silent and cold around him.

When he emerged from its black branches, the cold seemed to grow. He hurried through the snow and into the castle. Thankfully, classes were still going on, and no one noticed him.

The Gryffindor Common Room was warm and seemed to breathe life into him. When he hurried into the bathroom to clean himself up and put on a pair of shoes, he saw the scratches on his face, his neck, his shoulders.

There were bruises too, decorating the underside of his jaw, marking across his chest. They were purple and blue and green, and Remus was horrified.

When he pressed a finger to a bruise on his forearm, an electric feeling rushed up his shoulder. It was a clear sign of magic. Someone had attacked him, someone had cast spells at him.

"Oh, God," Remus whispered. Had he hurt someone? What if it was James? Or Sirius? Or Peter?

He dropped to the bathroom floor, running his hands through his hair. Maybe that was why they had left him. Because he had hurt them. He had hurt the people that meant the most to him.

Then he blinked, swallowed. No. He was being illogical. He had never hurt them before. Maybe McGonagall had found them outside and forced them to go to class. Maybe the bruises were from the other day, when Sirius had dared to him to ride a broomstick and had to blast him in the chest to save him from breaking into a thousand pieces on the ground.

A buzz of chatter suddenly appeared from outside the bathroom door. Remus scrambled to his feet, heart pounding. He opened the door a peek, and saw James and Sirius and Peter enter, all talking animatedly.

His heart nearly stopped. There was James, completely covered with bruises and cuts. He had a bandage wrapped around his head.

Remus closed the bathroom door, shaking.

* * *

"Hey, darling."

Marlene squinted through the bookshelves to see an amused pair of dark eyes staring back at her.

She peeked around the corner, and Sirius Black slid an arm around her waist.

She glared up at him. "Are you fucking following me?"

"Oh, how I missed the sound of your sweet, dulcet tones," Sirius said sarcastically, wrapping a strand of her hair around his finger.

Her glare sharpened. " _Black_."

"Aren't we on a first name basis now?" Sirius asked innocently.

"I've seen you all day," Marlene continued, ignoring him.

"How fortunate of you!" Sirius said pleasantly. "Most only dream."

"Oh, fuck you," Marlene said, though her voice lacked real venom.

Sirius's hand tightened around her waist. "That can be arranged."

"In your dreams," Marlene scoffed, but she couldn't stop the slow blush spreading across her cheeks.

Sirius noticed it, grinning wolfishly, and trailed his fingers against the thin material of her shirt. She slapped him in the chest, blush growing.

"Black, someone could see," she said, pulling away from him and pretending to be closely studying book titles.

"I'm sorry, Marlene, I'm just _addicted_ to you," he said, kissing the exposed skin of her neck.

" _Black!_ "

But Sirius was positively giddy. He kissed her neck again.

She turned around, red in the face, and he kissed her mouth. She punched him in the chest.

"That hurt!"

Then she grabbed his tie, kissing him on the mouth again. She was against a bookshelf.

" _Marlene?!_ "

Marlene ripped away from Sirius, hair and clothes disheveled, a terrified look in her eye.

Lily Evans was standing in front of them, having dropped all her books on the ground. She looked sick.

"Why, hello, Evans," Sirius said, not bothering to fix his shirt, which had ridden up.

Lily looked ready to punch him in the face.

"Lily, it's not what it looks like—" Marlene said, half-desperately.

"No, it probably is," Lily interrupted curtly. "I just wanted to ask Sirius where Remus was, since I'm apparently the only one who gives even a semblance of a shit about him." Sirius blanched at that.

"Why? Is he missing?" Marlene asked, staring between the two of them. They seemed to be staring meaningfully at each other.

"Yes," Lily answered, after a long silence. "Though you'd know. You're his girlfriend." She gave Marlene a cold look, then disappeared.

* * *

Remus was returning from Potions, when he saw Severus Snape.

A flash of memories pounded into his skull, memories that he had forgotten.

He stumbled backwards, into a wall. Snape was staring at him like he'd seen a ghost.

"S-Snape," Remus muttered, and Snape's eyes widened, and he hurried into the crowd of people, like he wanted to get lost before Remus found him.

A despairing feeling welled up in Remus's chest. Did everyone think he was dangerous? Did no one want to go near him? He felt— dirty.

"Remus!"

His head snapped up, partly in surprise. It was Marlene, pretty as always, though looking slightly flushed.

"I've been looking for you everywhere," Marlene said, grabbing his arm. "Where were you?"

Remus was staring at her. She had been looking for him?

She studied his face. "Are you alright? You look a little pale." Then she laughed. "I mean, you're always pale. Paler than usual."

"I-I'm a little tired," Remus said. "I'm just going to bed to lie down."

"Oh, okay. Sure." Marlene said, and threaded her fingers through his. He looked down at their intertwined hands. For some reason, her touch did not excite him, didn't give him a rush of energy. It was like holding the hand of his friend.

They reached the Common Room. Marlene squeezed his hand. "Hope you feel better," she said, and smiled brightly at him.

He didn't know what possessed him to do it. He just grabbed her chin, brushed his thumb across her jaw, and leaned down. They were so close her eyelashes feathered against his cheek.

And then she pulled away.

He blinked at her, let go of her hand, and went to bed.

* * *

"So what happened to you?" Lily asked suddenly. James looked up at her.

They had been doing very well at sitting across from each other and pretending like neither of them existed. James was doing very well at staring at his homework and pretending like it made sense. (It didn't.)

He smiled wryly. "You know me, Lily-flower. I get into scrapes and shit."

"You look like you got run over by a car," Lily said flatly.

"What's a car?"

She shook her head and sighed. "Never mind."

There was another long silence.

"Sirius said you did whatever you did for me." Lily said quietly. "So, whatever it is, I probably appreciate it."

James looked at her for a long time. "Lily, you're alright." he said finally, nodding.

She snorted. Her eyes sparkled at him. "Thanks? I guess."

"You want to go to the ball with me?" James asked, out of the blue.

"The Christmas Ball?" Lily asked, raising an eyebrow. She pulled her legs up onto the sofa beside her. "Who even goes to that, anyway?"

James snorted. "Possibly us. Don't girls like balls?"

"Don't stereotype girls, James."

"Alright, alright," James said, throwing up his hands in surrender. "Also, you just called me James instead of Potter. I'm going to take that as a yes to my ball invitation."

She rolled her eyes, but she was wearing a small smile. "Sure."

"Tell me what you're wearing the day before, so I can plan for it." James instructed her. She laughed.

"Whatever, Potter."

* * *

 **A/N: lmao turns out I'm alive? What? Soooooooo sorry about that random little disappearance. I just completely forgot about this fic. Does anybody even read this, lol? I have to get back into the groove of this storyyyyy I'll try to update more often?**

 **Alright, I'm done. Please review? I don't even have any bribing material. Can someone PM me so we can shit-talk school together? I WANNA GO TO HOGWARTSSSS**


	24. Complications

_Chapter 23_

"So..." Dorcas trailed off. She was chopping up toadstools.

"Hmmm?" James hummed, stirring his cauldron.

"You going to ask me, or what?" she asked, in a nonchalant tone.

"Ask you for what?"

She rolled her eyes. "Ask me to come to the ball with you, of course."

A block of ice seemed to drop into James's stomach. "...Ah."

She gave him a fond look. "It's alright. I'll go with you." She giggled a little, elbowing him. "I thought you were too shy to ask. I mean, James Potter? _Shy?_ " She giggled again. "Don't worry, I like it. It's cute."

James swallowed, stirring his cauldron purposefully and wondering exactly _how_ his life had gotten this complicated. Girls had never been complicated before.

A strange feeling came over him, like someone was staring at him. He looked up, straight into Lily Evans's green, green eyes. She looked hurt and disappointed and angry, all at once.

He swallowed and took a breath, making up his mind to tell Dorcas that he couldn't go to the ball with her. "Dorcas, I—"

"Sirius, will you go to the ball with me?" Lily suddenly asked loudly. Sirius nearly fell into his cauldron. Remus was quiet, not even looking up.

Sirius rubbed the back of his neck, looking confused. He looked between James and Lily, attempting to communicate something to James, who had confided in him and told him that Lily and he were going to the ball together.

"Um, I don't know, Evans," Sirius said finally. "Aren't you going with, uh, someone else?"

"Not anymore." Lily said clearly. She didn't look at James.

Sirius looked at James, frowning, then shrugged. "Yeah, I guess I'll go with you." he said.

Lily turned to Remus. "You're going with Marlene, aren't you?"

James watched a muscle tighten in Remus's jaw. "I haven't asked her yet." James frowned at that. Remus hadn't spoken to him since the full moon, always seeming busy when he came near.

"She'll go with you," Lily said, a little bitterly. Then she turned back to her work.

"That Lily Evans is bold as all hell, don't you think?" Dorcas said to him. He jumped. He had forgotten she was there.

He blinked, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess she is."

"I'm glad, you know," she said, continuing. "that you've gotten over her, I mean. I like her and all, but she always seemed to push you away. You're worth more than that." Dorcas gave him a very radiant smile, like she was attempting to comfort him.

"Oh. Um, thanks." James said awkwardly, and stared very hard into his cauldron, wishing he could fall in and probably drown himself.

Sirius met up with him after class. "What was that about, Prongs?" he asked. "I thought you two were going to the ball together."

James had just opened his mouth to reply when someone bumped into him, _hard_. "I thought so too, Sirius." Lily said bitterly, glaring at James. "Apparently he changed his mind."

" _Lily_ ," James said in a low voice. "Lily, you know that was an accident. I was just about to tell her—"

"But you didn't, did you?" Lily burst out. "Sometimes, Potter, I hate you so much I can barely breathe!"

She disappeared into the crowd, and James was left, slightly stricken.

"Did Lily just say she hated you?" Sirius asked, eyebrow raised.

"This _sucks_ , man," James realized, sorrow sinking down onto his shoulders.

But Sirius wasn't paying attention. "Look, there's Remus!" He hurried off to catch up with him. James hurried after him.

"Moony!" Sirius said jovially, patting his friend on the shoulder. Remus jumped. "How've you been?" he asked, in a more serious tone. "You haven't looked well since the full moon."

Remus didn't meet his eyes. "I've been a little tired."

James frowned. He could sense something was up. "Mate, what's wrong?" he asked, and reached over to touch Remus's shoulder.

Remus jumped away, breathing hard. "No, don't touch me!" he said, his voice slightly hysterical.

James and Sirius were both stunned.

Remus shook his head, swallowing. "It's dangerous, I'm dangerous," he said quickly, and hurried off into the halls.

* * *

Marlene was sitting on her bed, doing her homework. She was too afraid to approach Lily, who had been as angry as a firecracker every time she tried. She felt miserable.

The other girls were sitting on the floor and playing Wizard Chess. Dorcas looked up at her, smiling. "Want to play, Mar?"

Marlene shook her head. "No, I'm good. Thanks, though."

Dorcas shrugged. "Your loss."

"Hey, Mar," Alice piped up. "Did you hear that Dorcas is going to the ball with James Potter?" The other girls giggled and whistled, while Dorcas turned redder than a strawberry.

Marlene raised an eyebrow. " _Dorcas?_ "

"Don't sound so surprised," Dorcas said defensively. "He's been flirting with me for days now."

"Yes, but—" Marlene hesitated. "What about Lily?"

Immediately, Dorcas's sunny expression turned stormy. "What _about_ Lily?" she asked darkly. "He's gotten over her, Marlene." She raised an eyebrow. "As have you, apparently."

Marlene frowned at that. Marlene, amongst other flaws, had undying loyalty towards Lily. Chewing thoughtfully on her lip, she twirled her wand innocently in her palm, pointing it at the back of Dorcas's arrogant little head.

Patches of green hair started sprouting out of Dorcas's head, pushing past her dark curls. The other girls screamed, standing up. Dorcas looked at a strand of thick green hair with a mixed expression of confusion and disgust.

Marlene wore a small smile. "Turns out that neither Potter nor I have really quite gotten over Lily."

She picked up her things and left.

* * *

"Lily?"

Lily looked up to see Marlene entering her corner of the library.

Lily frowned at her. "What?"

"Lily, I'm sorry about kissing Sirius." Marlene said quickly, like the words had rushed out of her.

Lily looked at her friend for a long moment, then sighed. "Oh, Marlene." she said, half fondly and half in annoyance. "I'm not the one you should be apologizing to."

"I think— I think I'm going to ask Sirius to the ball." Marlene said slowly, thinking it through. "And somehow break it to Remus that way. Oh God, he'll hate me!"

" _I_ already asked Sirius to the ball," Lily said, frowning. "Why is everything so complicated?"

Marlene sat beside her friend. "Oh, well, that's botched then. Apparently James asked Dorcas."

Lily snorted. "Actually, he asked me. Then bailed on me and decided to go with Dorcas."

"What?" Marlene gasped. "That fucker!"

"That's what I said!" Lily said, as if the words had been bottled up in her small person all day. She scowled, laying her head onto Marlene's shoulder. "I hate how one moment he's sweet and kind, and then at another, he's conceited and rude."

"Hmmm," Marlene said thoughtfully. "This is all very complicated and unnecessary."

"True," Lily agreed. "I just don't know how to fix it."

"Neither do I," Marlene said, shaking her head. "I'm going to ask Remus to the dance."

Lily gave her a very strict look. "When will you break up with him?"

Marlene sighed. "I don't know, Lily. After the ball? Before the ball? I don't know."

"Do it with Sirius!" Lily urged. "You won't have to carry this guilt around with you anymore."

"Sirius doesn't _want_ to tell Remus!" Marlene burst out. The guilt was palpable around her thin shoulders. "I feel so terrible."

"Then I'd better go tell Sirius to man up and be a better friend," Lily decided. Then she hugged her friend. "I'm sorry for ignoring you all day."

Marlene smiled brilliantly at her. "That's alright."

They hooked arms and went to spend a good evening.

* * *

Lily and James were on Head Patrol duty.

They were not talking to each other.

James could no longer stand the silence. "Lily," he said suddenly. "Lily, I—"

Lily covered her ears immediately. "La, la, la! I can't hear youuuu!" she sang loudly. She pointed her wand at her ears and muttered a spell, which caused them to be muffled.

James glared at her. "You're being _very_ immature right now, and usually it's _me_ —"

"Nope, can't hear him!" Lily yelled, hands still over her ears. She gestured to a terrified pair of Fifth Years huddled in the darkness. "Can _you_ hear him? By the way, ten points from Slytherin. Get your asses back to your Common Room."

"We're from Hufflepuff—"

"Shut up, I don't care," Lily said, waving them away and continuing down the hallway with her ears plugged.

James followed doggedly after her, eyebrows knitting together in frustration. If there was one thing he both hated and loved about Lily Evans, it was her stubbornness.

"LILY EVANS!" he yelled in her ear. She swatted him away. "I DID NOT ASK OUT DORCAS MEADOWES!"

"You look like a cabbage palmetto?" Lily said, raising an eyebrow. The muffling magic was working excellently, apparently.

James rubbed his temples. "Oh, my Lord God."

"You can pray _after_ we finish our patrol," Lily said, shoving him down the hallway.

James attempted to cast the counter-spell to her muffling one by stealing her wand. After a brief struggle, which ended with Lily kicking him very hard in the shin and then blasting him in the chest with a very strong spell, James consented to Lily dragging him around by his tie.

When the moon was high in the sky and horny students were evicted from broom closets and hidden alcoves, Lily unplugged her ears.

"That was refreshing," Lily said. "I didn't have to hear your whiny little voice for an hour or so."

"Well," James scowled, glaring at her. "what I was _trying_ to tell you is—"

"The real, honest truth is that I don't care." Lily interrupted. "Every time you ask me out, all I can think about is this side of you, the side that is only willing to give me half your heart, while you ask for all of mine. I don't really think that's fair. So I'm done trying, and you can stop asking, and I hope you and Dorcas get married and have beautiful little babies together." With that, she gave him a proud, martyr sort of look, and flounced off.

James's jaw nearly made an acquaintance with the floor. "How did that get serious so _fast?_ " he murmured to himself, and headed back to the Common Room to sulk.

* * *

Peter had stolen James's Invisibility Cloak and had stuffed it in a bag. Glancing suspiciously around, he hurried out of the Dorm before any of his friends could catch him.

"Wormtail?" a voice said from behind him.

He cursed silently to himself, and turned, pasting on a smile. "Yeah?"

It was Sirius, who grinned at him. "Where are you off to, on this fine night?"

"The... library," Peter lied, attempting to end the conversation and continue on his way.

But Sirius Black was notorious for being an annoying, time-consuming prick. "The library? For what? You don't like reading."

"I'm studying." Peter said through gritted teeth.

"Ah, then I should come with you," Sirius said, nodding sadly. "My grades live in the pits of hell."

" _Padfoot_ ," Peter said, rubbing his temples. "I just— I need to be alone. I'm—" He searched his mind frantically for some kind of excuse. "I'm going to meet up with Narcissa Black."

Sirius tripped on his own feet and fell flat on his face. "Come again?" he said, voice muffled from the floor.

"It's a secret," Peter lied. "Narcissa doesn't want anyone to know."

Sirius got up from the floor, face shining with giddiness. "Wait, are you serious about this? You're dating my hot cousin?"

Peter punched him in the arm. "We're not dating! And don't call your cousin hot, you creep."

"Okay, okay," Sirius said. "You're _fucking_ my hot cousin."

"Stop calling her hot!" Peter was slowly getting more and more annoyed, and therefore more and more delayed. "And no, we're not! Narcissa is a classy woman. She's not a cheater."

Sirius scoffed. "That's not what I've heard."

"Alright, alright, just go to bed," Peter said, turning his friend around. "And don't tell anyone, alright?"

"Your fake secret is safe with me," Sirius said, miming locking his lips. Peter glared at him.

Sirius threw up his hands. "What? I'm going to bed." He went up the stairs singing an ABBA song.

Peter shook his head once, opening the portrait and escaping into the night.

* * *

 **A/N: Sirius Black is legitimately me in another form. Also, my poor baby Remus :'( Don't worry, it'll get better. And all the complications will eventually smooth themselves out, don't you worry.**

 **(P.S. I actually love Dorcas Meadowes. She too will eventually get better. Everyone has their flaws.)**

 **Also, look! I've updated! Please review? *looks at you with puppy-dog eyes***


	25. Dress Shopping

_Chapter 24_

The forest was dark and cold as usual, but Peter knew that. He was very familiar with the forest, due to the countless full moons he experienced with his friends each year.

The Invisibility Cloak felt alien to him when he was wearing it all by himself. However, the boys were getting older, and they found it increasingly harder to all fit underneath it together.

Dead leaves and snow crunched beneath Peter's feet. His wand was in his left hand. Surprisingly enough, Peter wasn't afraid. With the Invisibility Cloak over his shoulders, his wand in his hand— he felt like nothing, nothing in the forest could possibly harm him.

Sure, Peter didn't know the _exact_ spot the Death Eaters would be meeting up. But they'd probably make a ton of noise or somehow carelessly give away their location. The forest wasn't as big as everyone thought it was. He'd find them eventually.

There was a noise to his right. Peter froze, fear suddenly gripping hold of his heart. He couldn't breathe.

It was Severus Snape, who was wearing a black cloak and blending straight into the night, and was standing next to him, still as a statue. He seemed to be listening. Probably for Peter, who's footsteps had disturbed the deep silence of the forest.

When Snape seemed satisfied that he had only been hearing things, he continued deeper into the forest. Peter quickly cast a muffling charm on his loud feet and hurried after him.

Snape was unnaturally quick in the blackness. Sometimes Peter couldn't see him, and then the moonlight would reflect off of his sallow skin and give him away.

Soon, they reached a large clearing. Snape stepped into it, apparently held up his hand, and murmured something. He disappeared.

Peter's eyes were as large as saucers. _Now_ what was he going to do?

Quickly, he went over to the place Snape had been standing. Uncertainly, he held up a hand, out of the Cloak so he could see it. It disappeared in front of his eyes.

Peter's eyes lit up. He pulled the Cloak closer to him and stepped into the clearing.

When he opened his eyes, he was standing in the same clearing, though it seemed blacker and stinking of rotten magic. He wrinkled his nose and tried not to gag. Black magic was known for having a sickly sweet scent. It reminded Peter of the medicine his mother used to give him when he had the cough.

The entire clearing was completely crowded. Everyone was wearing black cloaks and talking animatedly with one another, eating and drinking. It seemed almost like a party, except for the grotesque symbols drawn on tree trunks and the same glint of insanity in everyone's eye.

Peter quickly moved out of the center of the clearing, closer to the edge of it. Snape was standing near a tree, sipping something. He watched the masses of people with a clear, calculating eye. Peter recognized it. It was the same look Snape gave his Potions book, when a recipe was particularly challenging.

Peter also looked over the crowds of people, and to his horror and slight disgust, recognized many of the students. Most were from Slytherin house, though he saw quite a lot of Ravenclaw, and a fair share of Gryffindor and Hufflepuff.

Bellatrix Black was obviously living her best life. She, out of all of them, was wearing a beautiful blood-red gown. Her hair was combed (for once) and lay around her shoulder in an array of beautiful black curls. Her lips were painted the same blood red as her dress.

Peter also noticed Lucius Malfoy among the younger recruits, and the frightened girl hanging onto his arm. Narcissa looked terrified and tired and resentful all at once. Peter wished that she was hanging onto _his_ arm, not Malfoy's.

"Oh, shut up, he's coming!" Bellatrix suddenly hissed excitedly, and the voices faded to a buzzing murmur.

 _Who's coming?_ Peter thought, craning his neck so he could see.

A figure made their way out of the trees. His gait was elegant, poised, sophisticated. Very unlike the unruliness surrounding him.

He had black hair, blacker than James or Sirius or even Bellatrix, and skin as white as moonlight. He was thin and tall, and wore a Muggle suit. He waved his wand, which was as white as bone, and a tree crumpled into itself and morphed into a chair.

He sat, idly twirling his wand between his fingers. A lazy smirk curled onto his face. He was a very handsome man, so starkly and coldly good-looking that it made everyone nervous.

He had very dark eyes, almost black. And Peter looked into those eyes, seemingly soulless, and was not afraid.

"Everyone is here," Bellatrix said, coming forward and curtsying.

"Hmmm?" The man was smiling. It was a very beautiful smile, though there was something sick and disgusting hidden in it. Peter was fascinated.

Bellatrix curtsied again, gave him a simpering smile, and then skipped off to join the ranks. Everyone was suddenly very quiet and respectful, looking down at the ground.

Voldemort, for it _was_ Lord Voldemort, stood up from the chair, waved his arms, and created seats for everyone else.

He smiled sweetly, angelically. "Sit." he said, gesturing towards the chairs he had created, and Peter sat, too transfixed to realize that Voldemort had created a chair for him as well.

"We have gathered here for one purpose," Voldemort began silkily. He had a very quiet voice, rich and dark and smooth. Almost hypnotic.

He held up one long white finger. "And that is _power_."

An excited murmur swept across the masses of people, and Peter himself felt excited. He glanced over at Snape, who looked dead, as usual.

"Each one of you is crucial to the turning of the tide," Voldemort said, stressing his words. He glided over to the opposite side of the clearing, touching a young woman's face like she meant everything to him.

He pulled away from her. "Each one of you will get your share of power." he promised, face shining. His sweet smile radiated over them.

"However, I shall not order you to join me. Your freedom is ensured both before and during my reign." he said, nodding his head almost humbly. "Your choice will earn my respect, no matter what it is."

He returned to his throne and sat, still sprawled elegantly on it. He grinned roguishly. "So what'll it be?"

A loud chorus of whoops and excited shouts filled the clearing, only permeated by his joyous laughter. Peter almost forgot that he was standing with Death Eaters, instead of friends.

When the meeting was over and everyone began to disperse and sleepily head home, Peter felt as if he had been shaken out of a daze.

As he fell asleep that night, he wondered why he hadn't caught the Death Eaters, and instead celebrated with them.

* * *

"Hey, bitch," Marlene called to Lily as way of a greeting.

Lily didn't stir. "Whassup?"

"No, get up, we're going dress shopping," Marlene said, hauling up her friend, despite her protests.

Lily glared at her best friend. "I can't! I have this whole essay due for Astronomy tomorrow—"

"That's nice," Marlene interrupted uninterestedly. "Okay, come on! If we don't leave now, we can't leave at all."

"But Marleeeeene," Lily whined. "I don't _want_ to go dress shopping."

Marlene continued doggedly dragging her out the door. "I'm sorry Lily, but I don't care."

Sirius watched them leave, loudly eating a cookie. "Where you guys going?" he asked.

"If you give me a cookie I'll tell you," Lily said hopefully.

Sirius tossed her one. She caught it. "We're going dress shopping."

"Oh." Sirius munched thoughtfully. "Can I come?"

"No!" Marlene said, looking appalled at the very idea. "Boys can't go dress shopping. That's crazy. Besides, Lily's your date. You can't see her in her ball-gown _before_ the dance."

"Why not?" Sirius asked.

"Because that's how it is!" Marlene snapped, annoyed. She grabbed Lily's hand and attempted to pull her behind her.

"Marlene just doesn't want you to see how hot she looks in her dress before the dance," Lily whispered fake-loudly, just as the portrait slammed behind them.

" _Lily!_ "

"It's true!"

* * *

Lily was very poking at a rack of dresses in an enormous store that was probably too expensive for her liking.

She had just pushed one dress to the side when she saw a familiar pair of eyes through the rack. Her own eyes widened. "Black?"

"Shh!" Sirius hissed, putting a hand over her mouth. "Shut up, McKinnon's going to hear you!"

"Are you following us?" Lily asked incredulously.

" _No_ ," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "I just want to see how hot McKinnon looks in her dress, obviously."

Lily glared at him. "Why haven't you told Remus about you two yet? You're being an ass, and you know it."

"We haven't fucked or anything," Sirius said crudely, but Lily could tell that he only said it because he felt uncomfortable and guilty. It was written all over his face.

"You're being a pathetic excuse for a friend." Lily said, lifting her chin haughtily. "You don't deserve to see how hot Marlene looks in her dress."

"That's not fair!"

"It is _too_ fair!" Lily shot back. " _You're_ the one that's creepily following us around!"

Sirius looked outraged. " _Creepily?_ "

"Aha!" Lily shouted victoriously. "You admit you're following us!"

"All my friends have ditched me!" Sirius said piteously.

"Don't tell me lies, Sirius Black!" Lily said sternly, wagging a finger in his face. "James Potter cannot leave you alone."

"He's probably somewhere looking for _you_ instead of _me_ ," Sirius moaned, throwing his hand to his forehead in mock-sorrow. "I've been _replaced_ , Evans."

Lily frowned, now slightly grumpy at the mention of Potter. "He's probably looking for Dorcas Meadowes, not me."

"Then we've _both_ been replaced! We can be in misery together!"

"Oh, shut up," she growled, turning away to look for her aforementioned best friend.

Sirius hurried after her. "Lily, don't leave me alone in here," he hissed, grabbing onto her cloak. "The scary clerk lady keeps on eyeing me— I feel so _violated_ —"

He hid behind her. Lily glared at the scary clerk lady, who looked about fifty years old. She smiled creepily at Lily, making her way towards her.

"Hide," Lily hissed, and they both dropped down to their knees, crawling behind a rack of clothing.

"We're safe," Sirius whispered, mopping his forehead with his shirt sleeve.

"Wait, I'll take a look," Lily muttered to him, and bravely stuck an eye out behind the rack. The clerk lady's shoes were visible beneath the tassels and ribbons of various dresses.

"Not safe!" Lily muttered, and the two of them crawled as fast as they could towards the opposite side of the room.

"That was close," Sirius whispered, looking visibly terrified.

Lily was staring at the pair of shoes in front of her, then looked up, wincing.

Marlene stared back at her, her left eye twitching.

"Oh, hello, McKinnon," Sirius said, also looking upwards at her.

"The hell are you doing?" Marlene demanded.

"We're hiding from the scary clerk lady." Sirius explained.

Marlene took a deep breath and count to thirty. "I have a couple dresses, Lily." she said finally. "Could you come help me out in the dressing room?"

" _I_ could come help you out in the dressing room!" Sirius volunteered.

Lily smacked him in the back of the head, getting up and patting down her skirt in embarrassment. Marlene shook her head at her, looking like a disappointed mother.

 _Wait here_ , Lily mouthed at Sirius when Marlene turned around. Sirius gulped.

 _What if the scary clerk lady comes back?_ he mouthed back desperately. Lily shrugged apologetically. He watched the two of them disappear into the masses of color and fabric.

Marlene was holding a whole bunch of dresses. Lily sighed loudly upon seeing them all, and Marlene gave her the evil eye.

The evening went by slow and torturously. Marlene tried on different dresses, Lily made an ' _it's okay, I guess_ ' face, and Marlene went back into the changing room.

Lily was picking at her nails when Marlene came out for the twenty-eighth time. "Lily? What do you think?"

Lily looked up, uninterested, and then her jaw dropped to the floor.

Marlene was wearing a beautiful cerulean gown that hugged her in all the right places, but fell down her body like a waterfall. It trailed behind her, elegant and simple and so, _so_ very Marlene. Tiny flowers and crystals dotted across the bodice.

Marlene was looking at Lily hopefully. "Yes?"

" _Yes_." Lily breathed. "Goddamn, _I'd_ do you."

Marlene snorted. "That's reassuring." But the sarcasm was only halfhearted. She looked giddy. "So it's nice, right?"

"That's the one, Mar," Lily said, nodding, and the two giggled and squealed together like real girls.

"Wait, what?" Sirius appeared from behind the racks.

Marlene positively screamed. Lily jumped heroically in front of her friend, blocking her from view, and Marlene practically sprinted back into the changing room.

Lily punched Sirius in the chest. "YOU. CAN'T. SEE. A. GIRL. IN. HER. DRESS. BEFORE. THE. DANCE!"

She punched him again, just for good measure. "YOU. ASS!"

Sirius blinked, rubbed his chest, and sadly went back to where he was.

Lily nodded, mentally giving herself a pat on the back. "That's it, Evans, kick 'em to the curb," she said.

Marlene hurried out of the dressing room, wearing her normal clothes again, but clutching the blue dress. "Is he gone?" she whispered, eyes flitting around like she thought he'd pop out of a dress or something.

Lily nodded proudly. "Of course."

Marlene breathed an audible sigh of relief. "Good. Now it's your turn!"

Lily's proud expression quickly turned to one of horror.

And the process began again, except with Lily inside the changing room and Marlene sitting outside, making vulgar comments.

Lily came out, visibly more grumpy than she had been half an hour ago.

"Strike a pose!" Marlene demanded. Lily struck a halfhearted pose.

"Next!" she barked. Lily filed back inside, robotically picking up the next dress.

This one happened to catch her eye. It was green, almost the same color as her eyes. It was cut mermaid style, and the straps fell around her shoulders. The embroidery was silvery and dotted with sparkling gems. It was a dress meant for a princess.

She stepped outside, visibly holding her breath.

Marlene looked as if she was about to burst into tears.

"My BABY!" she shouted, and hugged Lily so fiercely. "You look so grown-up and beautiful! That's the one!" She did her own little dance.

They squealed and giggled a little together, and then Lily changed out of the dress and back into her old clothes, clutching the dress in her arms.

They paid for the dresses, (they were a lot of money) and went to retrieve Sirius at Lily's request.

He was where they had left him, sitting on the floor behind a rack of clothing, twiddling his thumbs together.

"Dress shopping sucks," he commented, as they returned to Hogwarts together.

"Tell me about it," Lily sympathized, rolling her eyes.

"Okay. Dressing shopping sucks."

"Both of you are _so_ annoying," Marlene said, shaking her head, but there was a smile on her face.

Lily glanced at Sirius, who was looking at Marlene with a soft expression. It was a beautiful expression, and she smiled secretively to herself.

When Sirius saw Marlene at the ball, he was going to _shit his pants._

* * *

 **A/N: Lily is so damn cute. Also, can I just say that I ACTUALLY _AM_ SIRIUS BLACK. LIKE, HE IS ME. I AM HIM.**

 **Shoutout to xxRainSongxx. Our bee conversation gives me hope to live.**

 **Okay byeeeee I have a shitload of chemistry to do. Only reviews can save me now. *makes puppy-dog eyes at you***


	26. Human

_Chapter 25_

Sirius Black was sucking on a lollipop and strolling through the Hogwarts grounds.

He saw a lone figure cutting a lovely picture through the grayness and largeness of the sky above them. The snow was falling in great white flakes around them like glitter, like tears, like diamonds. Sirius had an affinity for the sky.

Sirius stopped near a pillar, twirling the lollipop in his fingers. The wind was ruffling the lone figure's hair. They weren't moving, just standing there, looking at the ground. Like they were waiting for something, and knew it wouldn't come.

 _Hang on_ , Sirius thought in slight surprise. _That's Remus_.

He waited a few more minutes. The snow continued to fall, except, only worse. Soon, Remus was lost amongst the whiteness surrounding him.

Sirius tossed the unfinished lollipop into the snow and hurried forward. "Remus? Remus!"

He nearly bumped into him. Remus did not move, just continued staring at the ground.

Sirius surveyed his best mate. Remus had not spoken to him for so long, always hurrying off before he or James or Peter could say anything to him.

Sirius was almost afraid to touch him. Cautiously, he put his hand on Remus's shoulder. Remus flinched.

"Remus," Sirius asked, almost quietly. It was not in his nature to be quiet. "Has someone done...something...to you?"

Remus did not reply. He stared fixedly at the ground. He was so pale. Pale, and sickly, and sad.

"Because you know I'll kick their ass," Sirius added, just in the hope Remus might smile.

Remus did not smile, or speak. Sirius wondered if he was even breathing.

The snow fell down, hard and quick on them. Remus's sandy hair went white. It went well with the wrinkles near his eyes, the deep, dark bags beneath them.

"I hate myself," Remus finally said, cracking his mouth open. His voice was strained and crackling, as if he hadn't spoken in a while. His hands were tight on the strap of his book bag.

Sirius searched his friend's face, but there was only sadness and exhaustion. He hugged him fiercely.

"Life is shitty, mate," Sirius said, pulling away. Twin tracks of tears were falling down Remus's face.

Remus gave a sob in response. Sirius hugged him again. (Sirius was not a hugger.)

Remus messily swiped his arm across his eyes. "Did I hurt James that night?" he whispered. "Did I hurt him?"

"Which night?" Sirius asked, looking at him in confusion.

"The— full moon," Remus whispered, staring down at his shoes.

Sirius sighed. "It's not your fault."

Remus gave another sob, rubbing his face. "God."

Sirius sighed again, rubbing his friend's back. "It's my fault, really. I— egged on Snape, told him to meet you in the tree. And James saved him, and, I mean—" He broke off, rubbing the back of his neck. "Have you ever thought about humanity?"

Remus swiped his sleeve across his face again. "What?"

"Humanity. How human we all are." Sirius said quietly, and looked out into the snow. "We're stupid, we make mistakes, we break everything. We're selfish. And no matter how hard we try, there's no backing away from the mistakes. We're human, we're so damn human."

Remus swallowed, like he was trying to breathe. "I know. I fucking, _fucking_ hate myself."

"You have no right to hate yourself," Sirius said. "Remus Lupin, you are one of the most selfless, incredible human beings I have ever met in my life. For a human, you're alright." He gave him a bitter smile. "Maybe it's because you're less human than all of us. Maybe that's a blessing, not a curse."

"I hurt people."

"So do I," Sirius said, shrugging. He took a deep breath. "In fact, I'm doing it right now." He looked at Remus, almost desperately. "Please don't hate me."

Remus gave a choked laugh. "I could never hate you."

"You might now," Sirius said. He took a breath, struggling for air. "I'm in love with your girlfriend." He blinked. "There. I said it."

Remus raised an eyebrow.

"And I've kissed her. While she was involved with you." Sirius blurted out. "And you might not believe me, but I'm sorry. I swear to God, I am. And you know what? If you want me to, I'll stop. Our friendship is much more important to me than anything else." Sirius nodded. "And that's a fucking fact."

Sirius did not anticipate Remus's gentle smile. "Okay."

Sirius stared at him. "Okay?" _Had he heard him right?_

"Okay." Remus repeated. "I'm going to break up with her." He smiled again. "We were always better off as friends, you know. We've never kiss or hold hands." He gave a bitter laugh. "Now I know why." He sighed. "I just wish she'd have told me."

"She wanted to," Sirius said quickly. "It was me. It's all my fault. I didn't want her to tell you."

Remus shouldered his bag. "We're all shitty people."

"Obviously. Because you had a deep talk without me." A voice floated out from the snow.

James's glasses appeared in the storm. "Assholes."

Peter's chubby face also appeared. "I second that."

Remus gave a watery laugh, and then enveloped them all in a hug.

For a moment, they were all frozen. They never hugged. Marauders didn't _hug_.

And then they all cautiously hugged him back.

Time froze. The snow fell down over them, encasing them in white, as if even the snow wanted to hold that moment forever. In that moment, all of them were warm and whole. In that moment, they all forgot about the war, they forgot about Voldemort, they forgot about darkness.

There they were, just them and the sky and the snow. In that one split second of their lives, each of them wished that they'd never, ever have to let go of each other.

This particular memory never really lost its effect on them. Years later, James Potter would suddenly remember it, in his last few moments of death, and Sirius Black would bitterly recall it from behind the bars of an Azkaban cell. No matter the level of torture or Legilimency skill, Peter Pettigrew hid it from his master. And Remus Lupin would one day look upon his best friend's son, the one that looked so like his father, and the moment would strike him. And he'd have to hunch over his desk, suddenly so full of pain he could barely breathe.

But each one of them, when their time came, thought of that moment, and were at peace.

* * *

"Remus?"

Remus Lupin looked up. He was sitting on the sofa in the Common Room. "Hmmm?"

It was Marlene. She looked at him, almost nervously. "Um. Would you like to come with me to the Christmas Ball?"

Remus considered, resting his elbows on his knees and propping his chin up. "As friends, right?"

Marlene looked as if her heart had stopped. "What?"

Remus gave her a small smile. "Marlene, I know."

Now it looked like her heart had _definitely_ stopped. "W-what?"

"It's alright. Sirius told me. I understand." Remus said, standing up and coming towards her. "Here, do you want to sit down? You don't look so good."

"W-what?"

"Sirius told me how you two felt about each other." Remus said clearly and slowly, so she couldn't miss a single syllable. "And I understand and support it."

Marlene blinked at him. "Remus, are you an angel?"

"I wish," Remus said modestly, and Marlene hugged him fiercely.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Marlene said, voice muffled by his shirt. She sounded like she was crying.

He sympathetically patted her back. "I know. It's okay."

"I was the worst girlfriend in the history of the world," Marlene said, sitting up and sniffling.

Remus shook his head. "Of course not."

Marlene hugged him again. "You deserve all the love in the world. I didn't give you even a hundredth of that. You deserve so, so much better."

"Thanks," Remus said, smiling slightly. "You're one of my best friends, Marlene."

Marlene started crying again. "Stop _being_ so _sweet_ —"

"Oh, dear," Remus said worriedly, and went and found a tissue. "Here, I'm sorry—"

Marlene ran out sobbing, screaming something about the evils of undulated kindness.

"Are we still going to the Ball together?" Remus called after her in a small voice.

She came back, furiously rubbing at her face. "Of course we are!" And then ran back the same way she'd came.

Remus settled into the sofa. "Well," he said to himself, after a long moment. "I guess Remus Lupin is single again."

* * *

 **A/N: Can I please marry Remus Lupin? What a damaged, beautiful soul that I want to hug for the rest of my life.**

 **A deeper, more sentimental chappie for you! Hope you liked it :)**

 **Also, apparently I reuse my jokes in the A/N. Sorry about that. I have no originality. That's why I write fanfiction lolololol *runs and hides from outraged ff writers***

 **lmao I'm just kidding. Real talk: I legitimately do think fanfiction is probably one of the best creative outlets out there. It really gets you started. You build on something that you love, and that's some good shit.**

 **Review?**


	27. Mischief Managed

_Chapter 26_

Sirius was sitting on the bed, eyebrows furrowed in deep thought.

James sat next to him, resting his elbows on his tarnished jeans. "What's up?"

"I'm just thinking." Sirius replied, after a long moment.

"About what?"

Sirius frowned at him. "Take a hint, asshole."

James laughed. "I can't, mate. Your business is my business."

Sirius cracked a smile at that. "You know how I really don't have boundaries when it comes to girls?"

James shrugged. "Sure. So what?"

Sirius shrugged too. "I go after who I want, whether they're in a relationship or not. I call fall in love in three seconds. Girls are so interesting." He grinned at James. "You know?"

"Sure." James said, though Lily had always been the one girl he'd ever wanted.

"Yeah, so. I'm thinking I _should_ have had boundaries. Marlene was Remus's girl." Sirius continued after a moment, his smile fading. "I shouldn't have done that. I feel extraordinarily shitty."

James considered. "Well, at least you feel guilty about it."

"Only because she used to belong to Remus." Sirius said, sighing. "Prongs, why did I do that?"

James shrugged. "You always do it."

"Not to Remus," Sirius said, like an afterthought. "I shouldn't have done it to Remus."

"Actually," James said thoughtfully. "you shouldn't do it at all. I think that kissing a girl who doesn't belong to you is wrong."

There was a silence, and Sirius considered. "Probably."

They were silent for another moment. "Good talk," James said finally, got up, and left.

* * *

"Hey, what's that?"

Peter nearly jumped out of his own skin, stuffing the Death Eater note back into his pocket. "W-what?"

"That note," Lily Evans came over and sat down next to him. Out of all the Marauders, he was the one she talked to the least, and she was determined to change that.

"It's— nothing," Peter replied evasively, and looked at his toes.

Lily studied him for a moment. "I mean, I won't tell." She gave him a friendly sort of smile.

"It's a note from Narcissa," Sirius appeared in the doorway, nursing a cup of tea. Peter glared at him.

"Whoops, sorry, I wasn't supposed to tell," Sirius said apologetically, miming locking his lips. He sat across from them, crossing his legs.

James also appeared from the doorway, sitting next to Sirius and avoiding her gaze. She glared brutally at him.

And then in came Remus and Marlene, talking animatedly. Lily smiled secretively at that. They seemed so much more at ease being friends than dating. However, she was still annoyed about Sirius and Marlene and their obviously uncontrollable hormones.

"This was supposed to be a private conversation," Sirius commented loudly, and James elbowed him in the side. Remus and Marlene joined their little sitting area.

"Is it really a note from Narcissa?" Remus asked. His arm was hanging lazily over Marlene's shoulder, playing absently with strands of her hair.

Peter glared at him. "None of your business."

"Ah, but it is," Sirius cut in. "We share businesses, unfortunately."

"Besides when you were sticking your tongue down McKinnon's throat," Peter shot back. Marlene turned the ripe color of a strawberry, while Sirius went completely white.

Everyone looked at Remus with slight terror.

Remus shrugged, giving them a small smile. He gave an awkward laugh, but removed his arm from Marlene's shoulders, as if suddenly realizing she no longer belonged to him. "It's alright." he said, but Sirius glared at Peter.

Peter sullenly crossed his arms and sank into the couch behind him. The tension was palpable.

"You're right, Pete, that isn't my business at all." Remus said, deciding to lighten the air. "That's why I'm ordering you to tell me, not asking." He grinned, biting into an apple from the table fruit basket.

Peter rolled his eyes. "And I'm under a vow of silence."

"I don't think you and Narcissa can be a thing," James piped up suddenly. Lily's head snapped up, looking at him. He still stared at the ground. "She's too busy with Snape."

The Marauders broke into laughter, all except Peter. "Yeah, you noticed that?" Sirius asked, grinning at James. "She follows him around like a lost puppy."

"Why is she still dating Malfoy, anyway?" Marlene asked, frowning. "It's obvious they don't love each other."

Sirius's smile disappeared. "Arranged marriage."

The mood darkened once more. "Ah." James said uncomfortably.

A silence reigned over the group.  
"So, Evans," Sirius said suddenly. "What color is your dress? For tie coordination and all that shit."

James was looking at her very hard, which made it hard to concentrate on her lap. "It's green."

"Green?" James parroted. "Like, one of the Christmas colors?"

She glared at him. "Why not?"

He put up his hands in surrender. "Nothing. Just saying you'd look too beautiful. I won't be able to keep my eyes off of you all night." He smirked at her, but there was a hint of pleading in it. Like he was asking her to forgive him. Lily glared at him, but couldn't stop the red flush that sprang suddenly into her cheeks.

"I'm going to throw up," Sirius announced.

"I second that," Peter said, looking slightly green.

Remus laughed and clapped James on the shoulder. "No one's used to you actually causing a reaction." He jerked his head towards Lily, who's blush reddened.

"Oh, shut up," Lily said, swallowing and blinking, looking anywhere but James. "Remus, did you ask Marlene what color she's wearing."

"She's wearing blue," Sirius answered instead.

Lily looked at him, outraged. "How did you know?"

Sirius grinned. "Lucky guess?"

"I already know, anyway." Remus said, laughing a little. "I asked her yesterday."

"Pete," James said. "You're the only one who doesn't have a date yet. Get a move on." He grinned a little. "I think Narcissa is going with Malfoy."

Peter glared at him, opening his mouth to reply, but Marlene beat him to it. "Actually, she isn't." she said, a little thoughtfully. "There's been rumors going around that he's not able to come to the Christmas Ball, so she'll have to find someone else."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Then she's probably going with Snape."

"Snape's already got plans with that Potions book he used to carry around," James said. "Key word: _used to_." The two of them snickered immaturely together. Lily kicked James in the leg.

But Remus's eyes widened. "Snape. Potions book. Potion— _shit!_ " He got up suddenly and raced out of the room.

"What was that all about?" Sirius said.

Then Remus returned, grabbed Sirius by the shirt, who in turn grabbed James, who grabbed Peter. And all three of them were dragged out of the room.

"You know," Marlene said, turning to Lily. "They get weirder by the day."

* * *

"It's ready." Remus said.

The four of them were huddled around a bubbling cauldron on a toilet seat.

Peter voiced his opinion. "I still think it's kind of weird that we're making the Map on a toilet seat in a girls' bathroom."

"Beggars can't be choosy," James said wisely.

"All legends start out with a cauldron on a toilet seat," Sirius said. "Obviously."

"Padfoot, that doesn't make it less _weird_ —"

"Shut up!" Remus hissed, glaring at them. "James, you were supposed to be counting seconds. What second are we at?"

"We're at second one-hundred-and-sixteen," James recited obediently.

"Your watch sucks," Remus said, stirring the pot a little. "So we'll probably be off by a second or so, but that's alright. It won't make much difference."

"But Mooooony," Sirius complained. "I want it to be _perfect_."

"Peter, shove his head in the toilet water."

Sirius slapped away Peter's hands. "What second are we waiting for, again?"

"We're waiting for second one-hundred-and-thirty," Remus replied. "What are we at now, James?"

"One-hundred-twenty-two."

"Tell me when," Remus said, holding a sprig of parsley above the cauldron.

They waited with baited breath.

"Now!" James squealed excitedly, and the sprig of parsley fell in.

A loud hiss came from the potion, a couple bubbles escaping and popping in the air. Sirius sniffed. "Smells like ink."

"That's a relief," Remus said. He was stirring. "It's finally complete." He was grinning. "Where's that parchment we wanted to use?"

James pulled it out of his pocket, carefully opening it's folded edges. "Right here."

Remus took it from him, balling it up. James looked horrified. "Remus!"

Remus gave him a quelling look. "It's supposed to happen, James."

He dropped the ball of parchment into the cauldron, and another loud hiss echoed from inside it.

They all peered inside. There was a long silence.

"Now what?" Sirius asked loudly. Remus clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Watch," he breathed, and they all peered inside again.

The ball of parchment resurfaced. Now it was curled up like a scroll. Slowly, it rose, shimmering and sparkling, and lifted out of the cauldron, fluttering in midair.

Slowly, Remus plucked it out of the air. He cracked it open.

James leaned over his shoulder, then frowned. "There's nothing there."

Remus turned towards him and grinned. " _I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good_."

And slowly, ink blotches spread across the parchment, spelling out different names and different places in the castle.

The three of them stared at Remus, open-mouthed.

Sirius laughed incredulously and punched him in the shoulder. "You ass! That's the password?"

Remus grinned sheepishly."What? You don't like it?"

"Are you joking?" James said, grinning like a maniac. "It's perfect, it's absolutely perfect!"

"How do we close it up again?" Peter asked excitedly.

Remus's smile widened a little, and he tapped the parchment with his wand. " _Mischief managed_." The ink blots receded, until they faded into the parchment.

"Oh, this is fucking brilliant!" James said, looking like he was about to burst with excitement. "Remus, this is _brilliant!_ "

"It's not finished yet," Remus said, chuckling. "It needs your essences, remember?"

"Oh." Peter said, looking slightly disheartened. "We have to piss on it?"

Remus smacked him with the Map. " _No_ , you idiot!" He rolled his eyes, sighing loudly. "Remember how you used your essences for your Animagi?"

"With the Patronus charm," James remembered.

"Very good." Remus said. "So that's all you have to do now. Except I have to do it too."

"You first, Moony," Sirius said, nudging him forward.

" _Expecto Patronum!_ " Remus said, and silver light burst from his wand and delved into the parchment, which shimmered with a silvery shadow of a wolf.

" _Expecto Patronum!_ " James said, and a stag appeared on the parchment.

" _Expecto Patronum!_ " Sirius said, and a large dog faded into the Map.

" _Expecto Patronum!_ " Peter said finally, and his rat Patronus scurried into the parchment.

They were all quiet for a moment. "It is done." Remus said solemnly. It felt like a sacred moment. He folded up the Map and handed it to James, who carefully tucked it into his pocket again.

He looked up at his friends, grinning. " _Mischief managed_."

* * *

Severus Snape was sitting by his window, doing his homework. A noise from outside distracted him, causing him to look up.

An owl was tapping at the window with its beak, shivering from the cold. Frowning, Severus unlocked the window, and the owl flew inside.

Hooting at him loudly, the owl dropped whatever it was carrying onto the bed, and then flew out the way it had came. Severus closed the window behind it.

He picked up the parcel, undoing the ribbon and brown paper around it. He cocked his head in confusion. It was his old Potions book.

He opened it, and a note fell out. He read:

 _Thought you might need this back. Who else will go with you to the Christmas Ball?_

 _Much exaggerated love,_

 _Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs_

* * *

 **A/N: And the Map is finally finished :) I found it kinda cute how both the Marauders and the Golden Trio made illegal potions on a toilet seat in the girls' bathroom. Warms my heart, it really does.**

 **Also, I thought this chappie felt kinda boring. Sorry about that. Today feels so uneventful.  
**

 **OH! Reply to Willa, a reviewer:  
I made this happen to show how strong their friendship really is. Their flaws make them better, in a weird, twisted sort of way. And they love each other despite their flaws. That was the whole point. But your review and opinion is appreciated. *bows humbly* I'll try to make it better.**

 **Peace out, girl scouts.**


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